Giving every £ a job

badmemory

I think helping with driving lessons is a great idea.  When my parents suggested it I think you could have heard my sigh of relief 50 miles away.

Blackcats

@badmemory - the cost of driving lessons is massive!  I think it is a practical way of helping the 17/18 year olds to get a skill for life.

i was chatting to my hairdresser and she told me that for her daughter's 18th she paid for a 4 day trip to New York for 8 people, £1000 towards driving lessons and will buy her a car when the daughter passes her driving test.  There is also £50,000 in a savings account for the daughter🙀🙀🙀.  Hairdresser has 4 children who will all get similar!
No wonder my haircuts are expensive.  

Part of me was horrified and part of me felt - I'm not sure that envious is the right word but it was a definite feeling of wishing that all my grandkids could benefit from a strong financial start into adult life.  

I have decided to set up a savings pot which I will call "fairy dust money" and which I will use to support our family with bits and bobs to help out as appropriate.  I've already sent a little bit of practical support to one of the kids when a domestic appliance broke.  Made them happy and made me happy.

PennysIntoPounds

It would be lovely if we could all be gifted that level of extravagant privilege, and while I'm absolutely bitter 😂 I actually don't think gifting that level of money towards young people is actually giving them a good start in adult life.
Quietly saving to help out where you can with driving lessons or legal bills for a home is one thing, teaching 18 year olds that that's what they can expect is just asking for an incapable adult and miserable family relations when there's resentment that the money has run out before they've even got older than some of your underwear 

Blackcats

PIP - you are right.  So much privilege is too much for an 18 year old.  I can't imagine asking/telling my parents that I wanted to go to New York for my birthday with 7 of my friends, paid for by my mum and dad.    Better still, I can't begin to think what they would have said in response to that birthday present suggestion.
the underwear comment made me laugh!  

PennysIntoPounds

Also, people like to say and believe that they're living the dream and are the best family ever- people are less willing to say or admit to themselves that they're up to the eyeballs in credit card debt, that when they say 'they have' they mean 'intend to have, somehow', and that if them or their partner lost their jobs or became less capable they'd be completely f*cked in every way.
Don't believe the hype, and especially don't believe it from those who tell you that much, they're almost always trying to convince themselves

I have said too much about my loyal undies 👀😁

Makingabobor2

I seem to recall my mum buying me a handbag for my 18th....lol.  It wasn't such a thing then. 21st was the big one back then. I think driving lessons were £1 an hour then. I know they did give me some money on 21st, but can't recall how much. 

ladyholly

For my 18th I got a tapestry frame and went to the cinema with my Mum and Dad to see Paint your Wagon. My parents would never have considered anything that extravagent although they did pay for my modest wedding about 18 months later. 

joedenise

I didn't get anything special for my 18th as my parents just didn't think you should "come of age" until 21 so I had to wait until then.  I got a couple of suitcases!

My DH was asked by his parents what he wanted for his 21st a party or some money.  As we'd only been about a year he opted for money.  They gave him £25!  A party would have cost far more so we were a bit disappointed as thought they'd give him more.

Scott_Weiland79

I agree helping with driving lessons is a brilliant idea. Any driving experience will help.

Driving lessons are flipping expensive, i only passed my test in March and I am 46. I started taking it seriously just 6 months before covid started (bad idea lol). I and was paying 45 quid per hour and a half, that jumped to 65 quid by the time i passed 

Motorbikes were my vice for years hence not getting my finger out sooner but old age and commuting in the freezing cold and getting off the bike looking like a walking ickle i was done.

EssexHebridean

I'm entirely with Pip on this one. I paid for my own driving lessons and first car - the car cost £100 and was character building. My 18th present from Mum and Dad was a "proper" camera - what we would call a bridge camera these days - and I got a good 15 years solid use out of it - I still have it somewhere, along with a LOT of pictures taken using it!  Helping out with the cost of  expensive things is great, but unless young people have the majority of input into things like that themselves do they really appreciate the value of them I wonder?