Life is awful at work advice pls

mummy2014

Hi all
I am looking for advice again. I was off sick for 7 weeks and I returned to work on a phased return in October.
When I contacted work he said they could only accommodate me one day a week on a phased return.
My first day in the office I had a meeting with my line manager who is also hr.
we got to the meeting and the first thing was said explain yourself, why you haven’t bothered to keep me in the loop. I had said that I had text and emailed her all the details and I had tried to call her and left messages for her on a couple of occasions. She said I had no consideration for her as she was doing her own job whilst covering mine. She said I should have kept calling her until she answered.
She said Because of my time at hone she hasn’t been able to take any time off.
She said that because my doctor had put on my sick note that it would be advisable if work were not to contact me with work related issues. This was because whilst being in sick I was receiving emails about various things, things that she was aware of and correspondence was in the files at work.
She said that she has had to remove certain responsibilities from my role as they clearly cause me stress. I tried to explain this wasn’t the case that it was a build up of things but she wouldn’t have it.
Now I feel like I have been made out to be incompetent. I have done my job 13 years and I feel like she is punishing me for being ill.
I don’t know what to do!!

Blatchford

mummy2014 wrote: »

Hi all
I am looking for advice again. I was off sick for 7 weeks and I returned to work on a phased return in October.
When I contacted work he said they could only accommodate me one day a week on a phased return.
My first day in the office I had a meeting with my line manager who is also hr.
we got to the meeting and the first thing was said explain yourself, why you haven’t bothered to keep me in the loop. I had said that I had text and emailed her all the details and I had tried to call her and left messages for her on a couple of occasions. She said I had no consideration for her as she was doing her own job whilst covering mine. She said I should have kept calling her until she answered.
She said Because of my time at hone she hasn’t been able to take any time off.
She said that because my doctor had put on my sick note that it would be advisable if work were not to contact me with work related issues. This was because whilst being in sick I was receiving emails about various things, things that she was aware of and correspondence was in the files at work.
She said that she has had to remove certain responsibilities from my role as they clearly cause me stress. I tried to explain this wasn’t the case that it was a build up of things but she wouldn’t have it.
Now I feel like I have been made out to be incompetent. I have done my job 13 years and I feel like she is punishing me for being ill.
I don’t know what to do!!

Bearing in mind the previous posts on this matter it seems clear- find another job or grievance. I think we've already covered a lot of the detail about not texting or emailing sickness notifications, not being able to complain about work not contacting you if you've asked the doctor to tell them not to etc. And it's hard to consider what is wrong with removing some of your duties when you have said that work plays a part in your poor health, and your are only working one day a week.

What is it that you actually want here? It isn't clear to me what you expect to happen. Or even exactly what you think they've done wrong. Where do you see this going?

mummy2014

I work 3 days a week.
It’s not my job as such it’s being hounded in my day off and being blamed for things that I no nothing about which causes me stress all done by the same person.

Dox

mummy2014 wrote: »

She said that she has had to remove certain responsibilities from my role as they clearly cause me stress. I tried to explain this wasn’t the case that it was a build up of things but she wouldn’t have it.
Now I feel like I have been made out to be incompetent. I have done my job 13 years and I feel like she is punishing me for being ill.
I don’t know what to do!!

...but it clearly IS the case, judging by your posts here. You are clearly unwell and I suspect finding it hard to react as logically and calmly as you might if you were feeling on top form - but that makes it next to impossible for your employer to help you.

Only you can decide whether to go on as you are, or accept that calling it a day in the interests of your mental and physical health would be the best option.

I do hope things improve for you once you've decided how to proceed.

Blatchford

mummy2014 wrote: »

I work 3 days a week.
It’s not my job as such it’s being hounded in my day off and being blamed for things that I no nothing about which causes me stress all done by the same person.

I'm sorry but that doesn't answer the question - what is it that you want / expect to happen?

Being logical, isn't she complaining (in your eyes) about the same thing - too much work to do, never getting any time off, the stress of the job? If that is the case, then maybe that isn't right, but can't you see her point? As I said, we have already covered some of the points extensively in the last few months - you didn't engage with her, and it was you who asked for no work contact then complained that they had cut off your work access.

I'm not saying the she or your employer is perfect. But you do seem to be part of the situation too. If you are going to move forward you need to decide whether this job has run its course or whether you wish to put in a grievance. And if the latter you need to decide exactly what you think is wrong here, and what you expect. We can't really tell you what to do, but you can't complain about things and then complain when they stop doing them that they've stopped. You asked for no contact, got it, and complained about no contact. You said your work was part of the stress, they have removed some of your responsibilities as a result of that, and now you are complaining they are removing some of your work. You can't have it all ways, and you can't have it so that only the things you want to happen, happen, and in the way that you want them to happen. Clarity is down to you, and you don't appear to be being at all clear.

TELLIT01

From this and previous posts it would seem that the only practical solution is to find another job. When your problem is HR and your manager, and that is one and the same person, there are few options open to gain a resolution which would enable you to continue working there.

pickledonionspaceraider

Find another job OP, remove yourself from this godawful situation

It really is for the best x

Comms69

mummy2014 wrote: »

Hi all
I am looking for advice again. I was off sick for 7 weeks and I returned to work on a phased return in October.
When I contacted work he said they could only accommodate me one day a week on a phased return.
My first day in the office I had a meeting with my line manager who is also hr.
we got to the meeting and the first thing was said explain yourself, why you haven’t bothered to keep me in the loop. - "Because I was off sick." I had said that I had text and emailed her all the details and I had tried to call her and left messages for her on a couple of occasions. She said I had no consideration for her as she was doing her own job whilst covering mine. - "That's a you problem, not a me problem" She said I should have kept calling her until she answered. - "I had better things to do than chase after an inconsiderate manager"
She said Because of my time at hone she hasn’t been able to take any time off. "That's a you problem, not a me problem"
She said that because my doctor had put on my sick note that it would be advisable if work were not to contact me with work related issues. This was because whilst being in sick I was receiving emails about various things, things that she was aware of and correspondence was in the files at work.
She said that she has had to remove certain responsibilities from my role as they clearly cause me stress. I tried to explain this wasn’t the case that it was a build up of things but she wouldn’t have it. "Thanks for freeing up more time for me to concentrate on my core tasks"
Now I feel like I have been made out to be incompetent. I have done my job 13 years and I feel like she is punishing me for being ill.
I don’t know what to do!!

Nothing? Why do you feel you need to do anything

Mistral001

This seems to be a classic case of clash of personalities. Such a clash happens when two people of similar personalities are put in a stressful situation. The two of you seem to be addicted to this relationship which seems to be one of arguing with each other.