Is this the way to debt free paradise?

daydreams.of.an.angel

I have thought of starting this diary several times and, like many other things in life, I have always talked myself out of it but here I am today actually going ahead.

The reason for starting the diary is threefold really:

1. Beyond the bills, buying food and petrol I genuinely have no idea what I spend my money on. This diary will serve as a spending diary/reflection on things I have bought. I hope to not only discover where the money is going but also to reflect upon and explore the reasons why I buy the things I do. Is it because I’m trying to keep up with the Jones’ or because I’m happy/sad etc.
2. I also hope this will help motivate me to make some extra cash throughout the month that I can throw towards my debt. I currently do matched betting and hope to find other decent little money makers. Tomorrow I, again after talking myself out of it several times, am going to set up an EBay business account to sell preloved items (mainly clothes). Hopefully a little diary will help keep me motivated when the going gets tough.
3. A place to set myself a daily to do list and actually get things done as opposed to write lists in my notebook that just get ignored. I will come back each night and update the list with the aim of having completed it every single day.

Hope you’ve brought along some snacks cause we’re in for a loooooong journey!

daydreams.of.an.angel

Where to start? I am in my 30s and live with my amazing DH in his lovely home. We have two decent incomes and don’t/won’t have children. DH is the complete opposite from me, he’s a sensible saver whilst I’m an impulsive spender.

I have quite a bit of debt (£31,082.18 to be precise!) from before we met, although nothing new since April 2018!! I’m determined to pay this off by myself whilst also maintaining a lifestyle with a few treats here and there (experiences over material things). DH is the only person in the entire world who is aware of my debts and has recently very kindly offered to help contribute towards them. Whilst this would be wonderful I have politely declined. Yes, we are a team but I feel very strongly that I got myself into this mess therefore I should be the one to get myself out and why should he use the savings he has worked so hard for to pay off the bad choices I made over 10 years ago.

As I moved into DH’s home and he was already paying all the bills we agreed to leave everything as it was and I would contribute an agreed figure each month. When I lived on my own I really struggled to budget and I was always paying everything late and borrowing more to pay basic bills. The relief of not having to worry about ensuring bills are paid has been a massive weight lifted off my shoulders and I cannot thank DH enough for carrying this responsibility which allows me to focus on ensuring my debts are paid.

As DH deals with the bills I have decided not to post my SOA in great detail as to be honest I could tell you the amount of the mortgage/broadband etc but I trust DH 100% that he has the best details for us. Therefore, here is my own version of a, very short, SOA

Income………………………..£1,450

Bills……………………………….£650 (this includes small overpayment to the mortgage & a little savings/joint spends throughout the month)
Petrol…………………………...£120
Food……………………………....£250 (need to look at reducing this)
Union…………………………….£14
Pet Health plan…………….£16
Dog’s savings……………..£20 (my mum and I save £20 a month each for when she needs to go to the kennels - Edit: the dog goes to kennels not my mum!)
Mobile…………………………...£35
Gym……………………………….£17
Car………………………………...£165
Debts…………………………...£11

This means I have £152 a month left over to buy bits & bobs for myself as well as paying extra to my debt. I also have a help to buy isa which I would love to start contributing to but that feels a little too ambitious right now.

Debts - £31,082.18

I have 11 different debts all of which have been defaulted on. Previously, when living on my own and having very little disposable income, each company agreed they would stop the interest and I could pay £1 a month which I have done now for years. I have paid off several small debts recently by concentrating on just one and paying more to that every month while the others just get their £1. This is what I would like to continue doing as I’m terrified of agree to pay more to each one as I know I’ll get overwhelmed, panic and end up not paying them at all.

daydreams.of.an.angel

I woke up feeling very positive and motivated this morning, long may it continue! Up early as I have a busy morning planned doing lots of bits and bobs then this afternoon DH and I have a date afternoon planned then we're going to come home and snuggle in front of the tv, so I need to get all my bits done this morning. Money related items on the agenda are:

• [STRIKE]Check bank account and move money if necessary[/STRIKE] done

• [STRIKE]Set up standing order as one DCA has changed[/STRIKE] done

• [STRIKE]Set up Ebay account / Paypal / dedicated email address[/STRIKE] Took way longer than expected, think it's done now though

• Put 3 things on Ebay - didn't manage to do as the whole setting up Ebay thing was a pain
• [STRIKE]Sort SIL's birthday gift[/STRIKE] done

• [STRIKE]Matched betting[/STRIKE] made £16.24
• [STRIKE]Go through box of Ebay packaging and see what I need[/STRIKE] Don't need anything
• [STRIKE]Make a few small purchases on new Ebay account to gain feedback[/STRIKE] only bought one thing as I couldn't think of anything else we needed
• Set up health care plan for the dog - still to do
• [STRIKE][STRIKE][STRIKE]Set up Ebay spreadsheet for expenses/profit[/STRIKE][/STRIKE][/STRIKE] done
• [STRIKE]Cut DH's hair[/STRIKE] - done
• [STRIKE]Only planned spends[/STRIKE] achieved!
• [STRIKE]Hopefully get a couple of loads of washing out on the line[/STRIKE] didn't get them hung out but everything's drying on the clothes horse instead of in the tumble drier
• [STRIKE]Meal plan for next week[/STRIKE] done
• [STRIKE]Report back about today's spends[/STRIKE] only £2.25 on ebay
• [STRIKE]Look into signing up to some survey sites[/STRIKE] signed up to curious cat and yougov. I have a long list of others to look into
• [STRIKE]Payment a day[/STRIKE] £7.25 to savings which I will transfer to loan when I have saved £100
• Get petrol if we take my car today - Took DH's car

I’ve joined in on the “make £10 a day challenge” aiming for £320 before the end of the month. I also had a look at the “Payment a day challenge”. I think this is a great idea and, I saved that thread and plan to contribute every day.

daydreams.of.an.angel

I had a lovely day out with DH yesterday, we went trampolining and then for lunch. The trampoline place was full of kids and most of the adults were just watching them then there’s DH and I having the time of our lives :rotfl:. Today’s plans are to potter around the house this morning then we’re off to visit family. We’ll need to pop into Tesco on the way home to get some bits and pieces, I’ll write a list and stick to it! Today’s to do’s:

- Help Mum with job application form we made a good start, going back on Thursday to help her make a cv
- Nip to shop and only get what’s on the list ended up getting a chippy on the way home
- Surveys didn't even look at them
- [STRIKE]Make sure Ebay is ready to go [/STRIKE] done!
- [STRIKE]Payment a day[/STRIKE] paid £5 to savings account
- [STRIKE]Matched betting[/STRIKE] made £79.54 matched betting
- [STRIKE]No spend day[/STRIKE] done - DH bought the chippy!
- Set up pet health club can't do it online will need to call them instead

findingthisdifficult

:hello: daydreams of an angel

Good Luck on your journey, I'll subscribe so I can pop in every now and then.

ceb1995

daydreams.of.an.angel wrote: »

Where to start? I am in my 30s and live with my amazing DH in his lovely home. We have two decent incomes and don’t/won’t have children. DH is the complete opposite from me, he’s a sensible saver whilst I’m an impulsive spender.

I have quite a bit of debt (£31,082.18 to be precise!) from before we met, although nothing new since April 2018!! I’m determined to pay this off by myself whilst also maintaining a lifestyle with a few treats here and there (experiences over material things). DH is the only person in the entire world who is aware of my debts and has recently very kindly offered to help contribute towards them. Whilst this would be wonderful I have politely declined. Yes, we are a team but I feel very strongly that I got myself into this mess therefore I should be the one to get myself out and why should he use the savings he has worked so hard for to pay off the bad choices I made over 10 years ago.

As I moved into DH’s home and he was already paying all the bills we agreed to leave everything as it was and I would contribute an agreed figure each month. When I lived on my own I really struggled to budget and I was always paying everything late and borrowing more to pay basic bills. The relief of not having to worry about ensuring bills are paid has been a massive weight lifted off my shoulders and I cannot thank DH enough for carrying this responsibility which allows me to focus on ensuring my debts are paid.

As DH deals with the bills I have decided not to post my SOA in great detail as to be honest I could tell you the amount of the mortgage/broadband etc but I trust DH 100% that he has the best details for us. Therefore, here is my own version of a, very short, SOA

Income………………………..£1,450

Bills……………………………….£650 (this includes small overpayment to the mortgage & a little savings/joint spends throughout the month)
Petrol…………………………...£120
Food……………………………....£250 (need to look at reducing this)
Union…………………………….£14
Pet Health plan…………….£16
Dog’s savings……………..£20 (my mum and I save £20 a month each for when she needs to go to the kennels - Edit: the dog goes to kennels not my mum!)
Mobile…………………………...£35
Gym……………………………….£17
Car………………………………...£165
Debts…………………………...£11

This means I have £152 a month left over to buy bits & bobs for myself as well as paying extra to my debt. I also have a help to buy isa which I would love to start contributing to but that feels a little too ambitious right now.

Debts - £31,082.18

I have 11 different debts all of which have been defaulted on. Previously, when living on my own and having very little disposable income, each company agreed they would stop the interest and I could pay £1 a month which I have done now for years. I have paid off several small debts recently by concentrating on just one and paying more to that every month while the others just get their £1. This is what I would like to continue doing as I’m terrified of agree to pay more to each one as I know I’ll get overwhelmed, panic and end up not paying them at all.

how many pets does that cover? you might be able to find a cheaper deal , if the food is just two of you, you could cut that down a bit. we've been struggling to cut our food down from £200 with two of us and a cat but meal planning and batch cooking lunches for work helps

daydreams.of.an.angel

Hi findingthisdifficult and ceb1995 :wave: thanks for stopping by. The pet health plan is just for one dog, this covers all injections and worming etc for the year (the kennels won't take her unless this is all up to date) saving £130. The food budget definitely needs to be looked at. The freezer and cupboards are jam packed and I need to stop buying things. When I was growing up our cupboards were always bare and I was always hungry so now as an adult its like I'm trying to make sure that will never happen. Crazy I know, its hard to stop but if I could get the food budget under control I would have a little more to spend on the debt each month.

My mental health hasn’t been great recently and yesterday I had a complete meltdown over the most trivial thing. I need to start taking better care of myself (easier said than done). I need to sleep better, eat better, exercise more and change the way I think as well as stop being so hard on myself. No to do list from me today other than take things slow and chill out. I’m working tonight so I’ll make sure I get a nice big nap this afternoon. Sometimes we just need to stop and recharge the batteries before we go flat completely.

daydreams.of.an.angel

Sold one thing on Ebay this morning but that was my mum's so I've not made anything from it. I paid £7.35 to the savings account, I can't wait to see that go up to £100 and make a payment to my loan.

Kitten868

Hello there,

Have you been on the main debt free wannabe board? Given your debts are so old have you considered sending a CCA request? It means you ask if they have the original paperwork for the credit product. Without it they cannot take you to court so there is no need to pay them.

Another note have you checked on your credit rating how these debts are showing? Were they all properly defaulted at the right time? Are they still showing?

Hope this helps and if you need more help with doing this theres help on the boards.

Keep going xxx