Debt Repayment - is there no hope for me??

Jon_J

Do I really deserve any Help?? I feel too ashamed to turn to anyone in person for help. What do you think I should do??

Since I started working ten years ago credit cards and overdrafts have been part of my life. Its now time to change!! I inheritated approx £65k several years ago and since then I have run up debt and payed it off. Whilst I have been fortunate enough to have been given an inheritance I feel extremely guilty about how it has been spent.

Approx £15k was spent on my house, £6k on 3 holidays, £30k is unaccounted for (frittered away paying off credit cards and overdrafts) and still have £14k in a high interest account account.

Believe me or not, my wife and I alongwith child do not have an extravagent, brand focused lifestyle. Our child is never bought the latest fashions, toys etc. Yet I continue to overspend by £200-£400 every month! I know what the problem is - I have no self control or discipline. I now seem to spend my life now thinking about debt, how much money I have wasted and how I could have spend the inheritance more wisely, i.e. reduce my mortgage! Its overtaken my life, I have become a bore to everbody around me. Money is my one and only topic of conversation. I am obsessed with knowing what other people do and how they apparently achieve more and spend more without having an inheritance.

I have now destroyed my credit cards but I am left with a £1600 overdraft and £7500 credit card debt.

What should I do? Using my remaining £14k cash to clear this debt is the easy way out. I keep thinking this would be £36,500 wasted money with not a lot to show for it. I would feel so guilty and probably become an even greater bore to evreybody.

Financial summary:

Income £2000
Bills £1100
Food £340
Other living £360 (going out, child's clubs fees, etc)
Wife part-time college costs £200
Wife's pin money £100

i.e £200 overspend already without any debt repayment.

Please help me, even if its just for the sake of everybody around me. I want a normal life back.

THNKS.

spendaholic

Hello Jon_J - and welcome. You'll find loads of help and advice here. And yes, there is hope.

You need to break down your "going out" and "other living" expenses for a start to see if there are any cuts you can make. Nip across to Moneysaving Old Style to find out ways to cut living and shopping expenses.

Just take a look at my signature - I hope it makes you feel a lot better. And if that £14k is earning less interest than what you're paying on your debts, then yes, use it to clear them.

Good luck!

mountainofdebt

I think that this would be better posted on the debt free wanabee board (even though you strictly aren't!) but you will get some excellant advice....I'm sure those in the know will be able to move this post for you)

It might be better as well if you can post full details of your expenditure along with the aprs & balances etc of your credit cards. To say that you spend £1100 on bills is abit non descript if you don't mind me saying.

Other than that I wouldn't beat yourself about the way that you have spent your inheritance...without wishing to sound too cruel ..you've spent it now move on!

The best way forward is for you to maximise your income whilst minimising your outgoings...if you can give us somemore info I'm sure MSEs' out there will be able to help you do just that!

mrcow

Hi

Beating yourself up about what's already past is only going to cause you stress and isn't going to save even one penny.

What you need is a Money Makeover. The first step IMO is to get rid of your debts (as you can quite easily). Use your inheritance and clear it off. I'm sure whoever left it to you would have wanted you to use it to make your life and that of your family easier and wouldn't have wanted you to feel guilty over the money.

The second step is to start a proper budget and look towards exactly where you are overspending. Your bills listed at £1100 is suitably vague. You need to break this down and then look towards where you can save within it. The food bill of £360 could be cut drastically, and the 'going out' bill should be slashed to a budgeted amount that is affordable and within your monthly means.

I'm sure that none of this is news to you, and certainly it's not diffficult to work it out on paper.....but.....a money diet is the same as any other diet.......it's the perseverance that pays off in the end.

Get motivated. Post some detailed outgoings on the site if you feel comfortable enough with it. It's a painful process, but OMG! you'll save loads of money month on month and after a few months will stagger over how much money you used to spend. I didn't think that I was over spending when I first joined this site, but worked out with my partner the other night that we're about £600 per month better off than this time last year (it's seriously mind blowing stuff!)

As for there being no hope........one thing that you'll soon learn is that there is certainly no shortage of opinions on this site. One thing that there is in abundance on here is hope!

mrcow

Oh and PS......

Cut your credit cards up and don't take any more out!

Willsnarf1983

could ur wife not get a part time job to pay for her own course...for eg minimum wage £5 roughly...to get 200 per month she wud only have to work roughly bout 50 hours a month (this is to include tax etc etc) and whats that two 6 hour shifts a week which is nothing really, even if its at blockbusters at night for eg. theres ur overpayment done and dusted other people will have loads of suggestions

Will

ps good luck

Willsnarf1983

whilst paying the cards of will clear the debt u obviously don't want to do this and its not gonna stop ur habit of overspedning, u have to get in the pattern of budgeting etc etc. its like an addiction, changing it is hard but once done is so much better than carrying on life as it is

Will

mountainofdebt

Now I would have said CANCEL your cards...but hey that's me!

mrcow

mountainofdebt wrote:

Now I would have said CANCEL your cards...but hey that's me!

Thanks for that

It's been a long day!!

Yes....cancel the cards (and cut them up into little pieces too for good measure).

burbs_2

paying them off will not be the problem in your case, sticking to it is going to be the problem. If you spend this money and clear them then make sure that you show somw self control and get yourself sorted otherwise you will end up in exactly the same situation with nothing to get you out of it this time.

Just let this be your mistake, we have all made them, especially me but luckily you can get yourself out of the messw.

good luck

Bossyboots

You are beating yourself up already so I don't want to be too critical but I feed a family of four adults on less than you are spending on three and I would say we eat pretty well.

Also, £360 a month for other living. I think you need to look at making savings here as well. I can't see why your wife needs an additional £100 on top of this. In additon, how much of the £330 is utilities? This seems an extraordinarily high figure.

Just on the face of it, you seem to be spending on yourselves pretty freely. It looks like you need to break the figures right down and see what you can do away with. Walking rather than driving for example. Do you need hot water all day, can you save on fuel by having it switched off for a while. Turn the temperature down 1 degree. The same with your winter heating.

As Will says, you have got to learn to budget. Even if you pay off the cards, you are simply going to rack it up again unless you start spending within your means. If that means making sacrifices so be it.