Running my Husband's business with him...

brownsucre

Hello everyone. This will be my first post here. I find this forum very interesting - it's warm and open to all to air their problems and (possibly get solutions). So I hope I will get some help here, please...

My husband runs a small business (self-employed). I signed the registration of this business with him in 2009. Then we had just begun our relationship but wanted to spend our lives together. We are now ten years together, so is the business. Though we officially got married in 2018. We have a 7 month old baby and two little boys as well, aged seven and four.

Over the years, it has been very difficult running a business that is dependent on sales and these do not come regularly. We are at the moment, over Fifty thousand pounds in debt because of the business. We have never been abroad on holiday nor with the children (since) these past ten years, because we cannot afford any spare cash. I just do my best to manage whatever money is available for us, cutting on costs here and there - just so we can at least be able to afford things for the kids. But I love/know the nature of the business and believe that it will get better. You can only run it with perseverance. I stopped working after I had our first child who is seven years old now - and have been the main child carer since having children just so my husband can have time to run the business efficiently.

Sadly, early this January 2019, I found out that my husband had messed with the business finances badly since October 2018, while I was recuperating after a very stressful/agonising childbirth. He had been funding his married daughter (from a previous marriage) and her own family (she is 28 years old, married with a five year old kid and a baby now and they live abroad) so that they could all move to London. While I was down and out in hospital, my husband was busy driving our finances further to the ground...
It's a sticky relationship with his daughter. She is an only child from his previous marriage. Her love for money is so bad that she once tried to defraud the UK Govt of Student Loan - aged 25 years then, by using our house address (we have never lived with her) and running off with the money abroad. Luckily, I found this out before it happened, and gave my husband a good bollocking! She always has fictitious money problems and always asking my husband's family if 'their' grandmother has left her any money in her will (their grandmother is not yet dead by the way). Anyway, you probably get the picture...

So, fast-forward to now... In January 2019, my husband could not pay our rent! That's how bad he messed with our finances. We had to go to the bank to withdraw some money (our joint savings) to save the day. I then started going through the business accounts with him - moving money from one place to the other, trying to offset bills, and payments. Gosh!
So, after a good lashing of the tongue, and days of (he) looking sheepish, he told me that he has decided to add me on to the business, so that I can also monitor the accounts with him - as he says, because I am very good and sensible with money... As much as it pleases me to hear this description of me, My Big Question here....

If my husband adds me to the business account, will this affect me? If so, what are the implications I would/could face? I know that it would be a brilliant idea to be on top of our finances, as husband and wife, but what will be the likely effects on me? Please I would appreciate every opinion here - legal opinions too!

Thank you.

silvercar

He could give you access to the accounts without "adding you to the business", whatever that means.

If the business goes under then it would be better if you weren't associated with it.

calleyw

I would not let him add you to the business as you will be liable.


Another question is the business really viable? Maybe time to draw up a business plan and show it someone who know there stuff. I see so many people who are self employed and they seem to be driving themselves further and further in to debt. Rather than go you know what I need to get a part time/full time to pay the bills and get by.



You are not working as a team as he seems to think its fine to take money from the business to give to his adult daughter and let you and your children go with out. Maybe time for some counseling to talk this stuff through.


Yours


Calley x

Doodles

Don't let him add you to the business account. It's a terribly bad idea.

From an outsider's view, it seems to me that both you and your husband simply aren't facing facts.

The business is not new, and it's £50K in debt - why do you still see it as viable? There does come a point where you have to be honest and think whether you are deluding yourselves.

Your husband is bad with money,easily taken in by others sob stories and worst of all keeps things from you. Yet here you are willing to be dragged further in!

I know my opinion will sound blunt, but it might be better to wind up the business and both get jobs. Then pay off the debt as fast as you can and then start having a more stable, and hopeful future. And take your kiddies on a holiday.

Whatever you decide, I wish you good luck.

kazwookie

Stear well clear of the £50K debt, do NOT get him to add you to this.

Let his give you access, like someone working in the account department of a business would.

TBH the business is not viable, if it is in this much debt.

maman

Is it the sort of business which you could do in your spare time and get paid jobs alongside?

sheramber

You say you signed the registration of the business with him. What do you mean by that? Does that not mean you are already part of the business- a partnership?

You can do the accounts without being part of the business- just as an accountant does the accounts for a business.

MX5huggy

A business with £50k Of debt may not be a bad business, if that £50k is a loan for a machine that makes £5k a month then it’s not a problem.

You need to understand the current legal structure of the business, sole trader, partnerships, limited company? Then what effect adding you will have on you will be easier.

Sounds like it could be a good team.

brownsucre

Thank you for the 'working as a team' thing that you pointed out. I also mentioned that to him when I found all this out. Anyway, I have started going through the accounts with him since January and we'll see how this pans out. I have set some drastic measures in place.

brownsucre

calleyw wrote: »

I would not let him add you to the business as you will be liable.


Another question is the business really viable? Maybe time to draw up a business plan and show it someone who know there stuff. I see so many people who are self employed and they seem to be driving themselves further and further in to debt. Rather than go you know what I need to get a part time/full time to pay the bills and get by.



You are not working as a team as he seems to think its fine to take money from the business to give to his adult daughter and let you and your children go with out. Maybe time for some counseling to talk this stuff through.


Yours


Calley x

Thank you for the 'working as a team' thing that you pointed out. I also mentioned that to him when I found all this out. Anyway, I have started going through the accounts with him since January and we'll see how this pans out. I have set some drastic measures in place

brownsucre

Doodles wrote: »

Don't let him add you to the business account. It's a terribly bad idea.

From an outsider's view, it seems to me that both you and your husband simply aren't facing facts.

The business is not new, and it's £50K in debt - why do you still see it as viable? There does come a point where you have to be honest and think whether you are deluding yourselves.

Your husband is bad with money,easily taken in by others sob stories and worst of all keeps things from you. Yet here you are willing to be dragged further in!

I know my opinion will sound blunt, but it might be better to wind up the business and both get jobs. Then pay off the debt as fast as you can and then start having a more stable, and hopeful future. And take your kiddies on a holiday.

Whatever you decide, I wish you good luck.

I do appreciate your bluntness, Thank you. The thing is, perhaps if I had been doing the accounts of the business with him, things would not have gotten to this stage. He is very vulnerable to soppy stories. It's a good business, if he sticks to 'discipline' which I do observe very much when it comes to money matters. We are going to have a meeting with one of the 'business debtline' people to start with - I have already started the process. Maybe now, we can start to salvage the business somehow. I have always worked all my life, while growing up - that is what taught me discipline financially. I recently started University a year ago so that I can move to a more promising career (which I have always dreamed of). In the past, the jobs I had done was based on 'survival'. But I am studying at my own pace as a mother to my little children, and wife. Running the home with all these responsibilities is not an easy task, and the 'care' for my children is paramount which is why I have been the one doing the 'childcare for them.
After what has happened, I now know, never to let my husband handle the business account alone. I will seek legal advice as well.