Our SOA...

theoretica

JamesEmma wrote: »

[...] argue every month is totally different... [...] When we are off we may or may not do things that cost more or less money. If we happen to decide one Sunday morning go out to a national trust for example... We'll undoubtedly have coffee and cake etc there... and then perhaps a pub lunch and a couple of pints in the afternoon. This sort of thing month to month may or may not happen...sometimes we may go twice a month an then other months not at all. The same goes with it spending whilst out at work.

To budget, you don't need to make every month the same, but you want a framework of expense that you can fit everything into. If you never consider the cost and decide not to do something then you aren't yet budgeting. If you always went for the cheapest option and a walk in the park even though you are bored of it you probably wouldn't be budgeting appropriately for your circumstances either.

Fireflyaway

My comment would be to change your spending habits and the way you view credit, otherwise you are likely to get into debt again. Do a written budget, allocate some spending money ( or you will probably get frustrated and quit) and the throw as much as you can at the debt.
Your story reminds me of myself a bit. We live in the South East and so high housing costs is something we have had to bare as well. My husband and I lived the lives we had become accustomed to whilst living at home, not stopping to think our folks had a 30 year head start. I don't remember my parents having my nans terrible old sofa or struggling to buy food as it happened before I was born.
At some point your debt will be gone, your income will go up and childcare costs will stop. Your situation is temporary. Try to do what our grandparents did. If you want something save for it.

speakingofart

It might also be worth checking out YNAB - I used to spend in a similar way to you and it's honestly been life changing for me.

The absolute key here is awareness - ultimately at the moment you are unfortunately only a job loss away from a major issue. The good news is you have both the income and the will to sort it out! :T

JamesEmma

speakingofart wrote: »

It might also be worth checking out YNAB - I used to spend in a similar way to you and it's honestly been life changing for me.

The absolute key here is awareness - ultimately at the moment you are unfortunately only a job loss away from a major issue. The good news is you have both the income and the will to sort it out! :T

I just googled YNAB and it appears to be America? Any issues using it from the UK?

JamesEmma

Also just want to thank EVERYONE who has contributed so far. I am reading and digesting everything though with a baby finding time to sit down together and get us both up to speed is easier said than done. Will keep you all updated and keep the suggestions coming!

kindofagilr

You can change YNAB to £££

I just started using it this week, got a two month free trial from a video tutorial on youtube (which made so sense) and I am in love with it so much already, highly recommend

DannyPearce90

I think you should seek professional advice for this. It looks like a very touch and go situation you are in.

JamesEmma

DannyPearce90 wrote: »

I think you should seek professional advice for this. It looks like a very touch and go situation you are in.

Professional advice such as? And why so?

Willing2Learn

Another vote for YNAB. The YNAB method helped change my life from perpetual debt to thrifty saver.

It worth trying out, as the trial is free.

enthusiasticsaver

DannyPearce90 wrote: »

I think you should seek professional advice for this. It looks like a very touch and go situation you are in.

I don't think that is necessary.

The OP can sort this with their income, some financial discipline and a willingness to sort this out. What sort of professional advice do they need? They are not at the stage of needing a debt management plan, iva or bankruptcy.

Any debt counsellor would tell them to get to grips with budgeting and focus on paying the debt down and getting into the habit of saving rather than borrowing.