Amigo Loan Guarantors - Taking your sister to court

CumbrianWolf

At present the sister in law is looking for work and may and only may for the first time have funds to begin to repay a reasonable amount to us, or towards the loan.

As said earlier the sister in laws ex, although we know has no liability to the amigos, loan has said he will be paying the loan from next month (this may happen but it’s just as much likely to be lip service) he does have a son to the sister in law and she is his prime carer so there is some tie between them.

I think the route we need to follow is.

1. Make our final threats that we are mobilized to now pay off the loan and we will take them BOTH to court, and for the courts to enforce the money from them and us to enlist Bailiffs, have CCJ and HCEO's at our disposal. We give them a deadline to begin paying the loan amigo so us as guarantors aren’t.
2. We know her ex has no liability here, perhaps unless my sister in law can prove the loan was to cover his joint debts, but he may still fear it and not be savvy enough to know he in untouchable. We think he has assets/shares in a joint business which is where he has been putting his money to get ‘back on his feet’ before approaching us to say he will pay the loan from next month, the threat of bailiffs stripping him of that might scare him).In truth we have been ‘mobilizing’ in the last few months sorting our finances after moving house in order to clear our credit profiles enough to take on a loan/money transfer to pay off amigos.
3. If they miss the deadline we apply pay off the amigos loan and take the sister in law to court only, she is the only one liable for the loan, although it sounds uncertain if we will win from what has been said on here, though I thought it would be pretty clear cut.
4. If the sister in law finds work and starts garnishing us with funds between now and sentencing at small claims courts we will cancel/postpone the court proceedings

If we did go to court and it ruled in our favour we pursue the money, as we can, from her over the next 6 years in whatever way is realistic of feasible, or actually worthwhile for us.


If it cost us £80 in legal fees + £60 to take to the higher courts to enact High court enforcement officers I think I’d happily pay that as money well spent if it makes her life hell. Be it for our satisfaction, or that she might actually be better to sort things with us directly.

chrisw99

Something else to consider - you said a couple of times there was a suicide attempt, was that a serious one, or just a fake cry for help? If it was serious, and you go through with this kind of plan, it could force her over the top and if the worst happened, could you live with yourself if you brought that on?

CumbrianWolf

chrisw99 wrote: »

Something else to consider - you said a couple of times there was a suicide attempt, was that a serious one, or just a fake cry for help? If it was serious, and you go through with this kind of plan, it could force her over the top and if the worst happened, could you live with yourself if you brought that on?

This has played on our mind, and is probably why we have given the Sister in law time to change, or for her and her now ex to take some responsibility over the last few months of us paying as guarantors

It’s a difficult one, whilst the suicide attempt was genuine (she was caught preparing herself for an overdose by her mum who popped in unannounced) at the time she still had my wife’s council and sister ship/friendship. She was at her rock bottom living in a rented home she couldn’t afford and was in arrears and two kids to fend for, generally the amigos loan had been paid up to this point. The landlord didn’t force her out for months and in the end I believe he became very stressed as he couldn’t bear to throw her and her children out on the street.

Over a year has passed since and she now has a new rental and is ignoring any commitment to us and the loan so we assume she his balancing the books and is covering rent and essentials, possibly supported by her ex who may be offering some financial support (due to the shared child). That we don’t know, but yes we do see the nights out, hair, nails, eating out, going to events/shopping with friends etc.

Mentally we judge her in stronger than it was, she is a better situation now (arguably at our expense) and generally she does not display the worried, sombre facade that she had. But now more so now a selfish one, or at least one that act is if she has no concern.

It may well be hiding the truth and inner worries and denial of her problems. But the fact that she has shown little remorse to her sister even before or after she was told she was basically no longer a sister tells us she doesn’t care enough about it. There has been no promise to repay what we have had to cover for her, and attempt each month (a few pounds) or communication to tell us she is trying. She may be quite frankly really doesn’t appreciate how bad she has been and what wrongs she has done. There may also be truth in that she is immature and perhaps doesn’t appreciate the consequences of her actions on others and takes liberties on family.

macman

Re point 2 of post 52: her ex is not liable under any circumstances. It doesn't matter if she handed over the entire loan to him and he blew the lot on Mexican dancing girls. His name was not on the loan agreement . Only you and your SIL are liable, as signatories.

CumbrianWolf

macman wrote: »

Re point 2 of post 52: her ex is not liable under any circumstances. It doesn't matter if she handed over the entire loan to him and he blew the lot on Mexican dancing girls. His name was not on the loan agreement . Only you and your SIL are liable, as signatories.

Agreed...I thought I said that in my post.

It doesn't mean he doesnt realise that or at least feels morally responsible if he feels the heavies are coming for him.

Hence why I said in the latter point it would only be the SIL we would take to small claims court

glennstar

CumbrianWolf wrote: »

We have had to cover the loan as guarantors for the best part of a year now, meanwhile my sister-in-law has shown little remorse or even paid a penny towards her debt. At the same time she can still have sky TV installed, get her hair and nails done and go on nights out getting trollied. As you might expect, a family rift has ensued and My wife and her sister are not on good terms, and only keep the peace so that our son and cousin can see each other.

Do not stand guarantor unless you expect to pay the loan back yourself, regardless of the circumstances - that's what standing guarantor means!

Furthermore, you may have a difficult time convincing a court that you are owed the money and should be paid back as this is not the basis on which the agreement was made - and may just end up costing you more in fees than you manage to recover.

Your soundest course of action (as per other comments) is;

1. learn a lesson, hard as that may be to do,
2. write the money off, hard as that may be to do,
3. rebuild your relationship with sister in law, hard as that may be to do... life is too short and regrets linger too long.

dealer_wins

I would also recommend all family members put a protective CIFAS fraud alert, it costs £20 for 2 years and alerts any potential lenders she fraudulently applies for loans with, making them do many other extra checks and stopping any possible further frauds by her.

https://www.cifas.org.uk/services/identity-protection/protective-registration

macman

CumbrianWolf wrote: »

Agreed...I thought I said that in my post.

It doesn't mean he doesnt realise that or at least feels morally responsible if he feels the heavies are coming for him.

Hence why I said in the latter point it would only be the SIL we would take to small claims court

Whether he feels morally responsible, or couldn't give a damn, either way you cannot take him to court anyway.
I'm not convinced you even have a case against your SIL-you really need professional legal advice.

Paul_DNAP

The only certainty in all of this is that if you take, or threaten to take, your SiL to court then your chances of ever having an amicable relationship again will take an incredible nose dive.


In my opinion the phrase "neither a lender nor a borrow be" should be appended with "and absolutely don't ever be a guarantor, that's basically like being both and neither of them at the same time".

JimmyTheWig

Paul_DNAP wrote: »

The only certainty in all of this is that if you take, or threaten to take, your SiL to court then your chances of ever having an amicable relationship again will take an incredible nose dive.

Can they get much worse when she has, in effect, stolen thousands of pounds from the OP?