is it just my OH

one-day

that likes to hide his head in the sand with the debts even though alot of the debts are from him before we got together. sorry for having a moan the thing is i have some debts but not many but my OH has loads of debts. it was me that fished out his unopen letters from them that he had hide and me that wrote letter asking if they would take so much a month.
to this day he still thinks there is nothing to worry about and when his pay day comes i have to say i have lost the cash card as he just wants to spend don't get me wrong i love him to bits and he is a great dad he is just messy when it comes to money.
sorry for the rant

pania

one-day wrote: »

that likes to hide his head in the sand with the debts

No!!!! i can most definately say hon that majority of us here have OH's that have been a constant source of frustration re money. Please please don't feel alone.

You cannot unfortunately make the horse thats standing at the edge of the lake bend it's neck and drink, all you can do is guide it there and allow it to work out itself what it needs to do. Same with OH's whether male or female.

My OH is an absolute !!!!!! with money but slowly slowly is realising that it's the easy way or the hard way. Don't hide the cash card, agree with him a weekly or daily allowance that is within his budget and hand it to him in cash. make it very clear once it's gone there ain't no more. let him know the reasons why you are doing it this way and that youa e just trying to help him until he sees his situation for himself. I kept bailing OH out for MONTHS after movin g in together, things have got much easier as i refuse to do so now and he is taking much more responsibility for his money.

Let him know that you are there whether things are good or bad financially but you'd rather know so you can help.

Good luck hon. xx

immoral_angeluk

Nope you're not alone. Ste was an absolute nightmare in the beginning. Having strops because I was controlling the money, resenting me because he couldn't spend the money he worked hard to earnhow he wanted to. But slowly and surely he came around and now really appreciates the effort he's put in. We're so close now we can taste freedom! lol!

one-day

thanks to u both i think i need to talk to him about giving him so much a week and hopefully he will come round slowly too

pania

think you got 2 threads running here one day!!! :-)

one-day

i think i do. i have my dd sat on my knee grabbing the keyboard i think she pressed enter then i must of as well

Jacks_xxx

My lovely hubby (bless his heart) thought everything was fine as long as we could pay the minimums and we weren't being turned down for new debt to pay off the old debt.

(Cos loan companies wouldn't lend us money we couldn't afford to pay back would they?????? )

And we're both in the "life is for living" camp so we've always overspent on booze, gigs, and holidays. (and lipstick in my case. )

Cos "if you can pay for it, you can afford it " never mind that it's all going on plastic!

He still hates dealing with finances now, and somehow seems to have managed to sign us up to a new house contents insurance policy that appears to insure the contents of our freezer for up to £55,000 but nothing else in the house is covered!

(I need to get over to the Insurance board! :eek:

You're not alone hon!

Love Jacks xxx

pania

LOL Jacks, that made me laugh! would say MEN! here in a hurumphy voice but think i may just say OH'S!!! instead as they all seem to be the same whether male or female!! lol.

immoral_angeluk

Jacks_xxx wrote: »

He still hates dealing with finances now, and somehow seems to have managed to sign us up to a new house contents insurance policy that appears to insure the contents of our freezer for up to £55,000 but nothing else in the house is covered!

:rotfl: :rotfl: :rotfl: :rotfl: :rotfl: :rotfl:

Jacks_xxx

pania wrote: »

LOL Jacks, that made me laugh! would say MEN! here in a hurumphy voice but think i may just say OH'S!!! instead as they all seem to be the same whether male or female!! lol.

Cheers honey!

I know... bless him... He's like.. :T The Best Bloke In The History Of The Whole Wide World Ever :T but even more of a nightmare with money than I am - which puts me neatly in the role of "The Sensible One" - which is horrible miscasting even if I do say so myself.

It does often seem to be only one half of a couple who's posting on here doesn't it?

Hmmmm...

Love Jacks xxx

meyore

Mine is just as bad. This month I've told him I'm keeping his bank card and he can have "pocket money!" He acts like a child with his money. He has to spend it as quickly as possible on whatever junk he can find. And then he regrets it when theres none left.
He wasn't happy, but he agreed to give it a go. I think he'll come round to the idea when he realises how far his wages could actually go if he wasn't wasting them.