We’d like to remind Forumites to please avoid political debate on the Forum.

This is to keep it a safe and useful space for MoneySaving discussions. Threads that are – or become – political in nature may be removed in line with the Forum’s rules. Thank you for your understanding.

📨 Have you signed up to the Forum's new Email Digest yet? Get a selection of trending threads sent straight to your inbox daily, weekly or monthly!
The Forum now has a brand new text editor, adding a bunch of handy features to use when creating posts. Read more in our how-to guide

breaking up (home owners)

I don't really know where to else to go for advice and hoped someone may know or have a similar experience. Myself and now ex boyfriend had bought our first home together. (In both our names) Although I just pay all the bills too him and he then pays the bills that are in our name. So he has all the account details! (Hopefully this is not a problem?) A few months ago he had tried to buy me out the property and that I would just be paying rent as I had quit my job due to the pressures of him telling me to earn more. He's always earned more than me and from the start of the relationship it's also been 50/50 and I've struggled! I can't blame him for having a good job but at the time I said no as I would be able to borrow the money and I also got given my old job back. Everything was fine but he has been making out to everyone that my mental health is really bad and whilst on a work night out he kissed his colleague and they've been chatting away ever since, when I asked him about his night out he never told me about this and it was through Facebook I found out what had happened and seen all the texts back and forth. I feel angry because he knows he will get the flat as he earns more and I had only just got my job back so I wouldn't be able to buy him out.

Last night I told him I wanted to think about things and didn't want to be pushed but then he started shouting and becoming more aggressive as he had expected me out of the property before he got home. He then brought his mum round which he knows how much she intimidates me. They then offered me half of the money of what I've paid into the flat so far and that I'll get the rest as it will take some days to clear. He hasn't told me when he wants to sort the legal side and I don't know where to go from here..

Can this affect me in the future if I want another mortgage when I am able to afford it?
What is the process of it changing to just his name? - Will HSBC do checks again and if he was to not get approved would this then cost us both? Does it have to go through a lawyer too or can HSBC just change this and what would be the costs?

Comments

  • I suggest you speak to a lawyer here asap.

    You are likely to be entitled to a half of the value that the property may have gained since you bought it.

    Also there is no guarantee he will be able to get a mortgage on his own.

    Either way get a legal advice asap.
  • ACG
    ACG Posts: 24,857 Forumite
    Part of the Furniture 10,000 Posts Name Dropper I've helped Parliament
    Dont accept any money or move out until your name is off that mortgage.
    What happens if you move out and he changes his mind or can not get you off the Mortgage?

    As above - solicitors job, get some advice.
    I am a Mortgage Adviser
    You should note that this site doesn't check my status as a mortgage adviser, so you need to take my word for it. This signature is here as I follow MSE's Mortgage Adviser Code of Conduct. Any posts on here are for information and discussion purposes only and shouldn't be seen as financial advice.
This discussion has been closed.
Meet your Ambassadors

🚀 Getting Started

Hi new member!

Our Getting Started Guide will help you get the most out of the Forum

Categories

  • All Categories
  • 353.5K Banking & Borrowing
  • 254.2K Reduce Debt & Boost Income
  • 455.1K Spending & Discounts
  • 246.6K Work, Benefits & Business
  • 603K Mortgages, Homes & Bills
  • 178.1K Life & Family
  • 260.6K Travel & Transport
  • 1.5M Hobbies & Leisure
  • 16K Discuss & Feedback
  • 37.7K Read-Only Boards

Is this how you want to be seen?

We see you are using a default avatar. It takes only a few seconds to pick a picture.