A Plan at Long Last

chris27chris27 Forumite
74 Posts
Part of the Furniture Combo Breaker
Forumite
So the time came finally a 4 weeks ago where I owned up to my partner on my debts.

I've been keeping it all to myself to shelter her from my stress, and all it's been doing is stressing me out, and then whenever she talked about money and holidays, and buying this or that, I wasn't able to commit, which made me sound like I was uninterested in doing those things or not enthusiastic.

So I kept getting frustrated that she was getting frustrated with me, and then I realised.....how can I blame her or get annoyed at her for getting annoyed with me, when she doesn't have all the information.

So I took the action to tell her, but before I told her I made sure that I'd got a plan in place.

I downloaded the snowball repayment spreadsheet and filled it all in.

I made a spreadsheet with all my outgoings and incomings on to track what I had left each month as well.

Armed with this I let her into my situation and showed her my plan.

What a relief it was.....and her reaction was totally the opposite of what I had feared. Totally supportive and now understands why I've been the way I have when she's talked about spending money on stuff.

There is now context.

My debts total £17'800 that I've spread across multiple 0% balance transfer cards, and now realising that 2 cards I'm paying interest on.

I should have my first card paid off by November this year, which will be one of the cards I'm paying interest on.

Then fully debt free by 2021 which sounds a long way away, but I know it will come quick.

I feels so much better now knowing someone else knows and is supporting me.

Replies

  • UncannyScotUncannyScot Forumite
    2.1K Posts
    Fifth Anniversary 1,000 Posts Photogenic
    Forumite
    Hi And welcome :D

    You have taken that first big step and it is great to hear that your SO is supportive and understanding.

    We are a friendly and supportive bunch on here, so feel free to visit folks diaries, post up any questions you have and join in the community here.
    BUGGRITMILLENIUMHANDANDSHRIMP I TOLD EM! - Foul Ole Ron
    It is important that we know where we come from, because if you do not know where you come from, then you do not know where you are, and if you don't know where you are, then you don't know where you are going. If you don't know where you're going, you're probably going wrong.
    R.I.P. T.P.
  • StarmummyStarmummy Forumite
    537 Posts
    Good luck. Telling partners can be so scary. I remember the moment I told mine. I'd taken him away for the weekend as a Christmas (travel is one of the reasons I got so deep- idiot) and he was asking for me to move in with him and he couldn't understand why I was so reserved about it. What should have been a lovely walk in a gorgeous city ended with me having a huge panic attack before letting him into my big secret. Instead of running away like I'd feared he just wanted to help.

    Well done you on opening up and starting to tackle this !!!9786;
    debt consolidated 16/8/18 £9,788.01/£12,618.12 :( (Total debt at LBM 1st Jan '18 c..£19.5k)
    EF/FIT savings £97.24 Other Savings £12.17 House Deposit £4,762.64/£20,000 23.8% :D
  • louby40louby40 Forumite
    1.5K Posts
    Tenth Anniversary 1,000 Posts Combo Breaker
    Forumite
    Hi and welcome to the forums! You have a plan and best of all a supportive partner. Your debt will be gone before you know it. :T
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