Advice for an Idiot!

Richmc

Mobile phones pay as you go cheapest phone you can get second hand NO smart phones, use Giff Gaff £5 per month NO top up if you go over you will learn to restrict your use. Destroy your credit cards. Downgrade your car a 3L car must be quite something and completely OTT, medium hatchback cheap tax and insurance.

spudsmum

Dont really have a lot to add as most has already been said but I would look at your shopping habits.

£100 a week for food is a lot. Can you meal plan and shop to a list? That would probably save you money. We plan well so we use all of our leftovers too so nothing is ever wasted.

We spend £50-£60 a week on food for 5 of us and that includes nappies, wipes, milk for TWO babies. I have to do my shopping at Tesco as my nearest ALDI is 15 miles away so I could probably get this down even more.

Have a look and see if theres anything you can sell. It's amazing what people will buy on local selling sites

Look systematically at every single bill and expense and see where you can trim it down - small things make a huge difference.

Please, please get buildings insurance - you have insured your pet but not your home? You have a £20 monthly budget for haircuts - lose this (cut your own or find a local college or trainee that needs models) and use the money for buildings insurence - it's about priorities.

I wish you lots of luck

LabRatty

Hi BA,
Well done for trying to face up to your situation. I would agree with Enthusiastic - read the DMP support thread at the top of the board and learn how others are managing their own DMPs. They are a friendly and helpful bunch and will be able to answer any questions that you can't see answers to already.

Re your family situation, babies and small children are VERY tiring and I would be wary of pushing your wife to work outside the home after a day with the two of them unless she would welcome the change. I had a friend who worked evenings to make extra money, which was then spent on convenience food when she was too tired to cook properly - result: more exhaustion, poorer diet and no more money. This is obviously to be avoided.

From your post, it may be that her best contribution to you tackling your debts is to manage the household budget as efficiently as possible - something which you say has been lacking.

Decide together on a realistic budget for food and essentials (not indulgences...) Plan meals for a week and shop accordingly, not necessarily all in one go. You don't have to live on bread & water; look at the old style board for recipes and batch cook to save time, energy and money. Always have something in the freezer which can be thawed for an evening meal to avoid takeaways and impulse spends. Take packed lunches/leftovers to work rather than spend out. Depending on your work pattern, take a turn cooking when you're available or look after the kids so she can cook/prepare/plan uninterrupted (such a luxury when kids are v. small). Work as a team to overhaul all aspects of your family expenses and see how much difference you can make. Keep a tight rein on your finances and review the situation monthly together.

If you can do this, I think you have the capacity to make significant changes, but you have to see it as a challenge you both embrace rather than a slog you're unenthusiastic about.

All the best,
LR

vegasphil

Does your Help to buy loan increase this year on the house?

Be cautious about using purple bricks if you do decide to sell. Their "fee" is payable regardless. There is research by Jeffries online showing that they only sell around 50% of properties they list (but take their fee on all) - they called it a 50/50 coin toss! Plus watchdog etc.

High street agents are there to be negotiated with and will mostly be "no sale no fee"

Pixie5740

Personally I wouldn't sell the house. You've got to live somewhere so you either rent a property from a landlord or you rent the money from a bank. A few years of knuckling down and you should be back on an even keel.

Lots of good suggestions already about reducing mobiles phones and getting rid of Sky. I have one for boosting your income a bit but every little helps. [STRIKE]If your wife is a SAHP just now are you using the Marriage Allowance to reduce your tax liability? You can even backdate your claim to 5th April 2015.

https://www.gov.uk/marriage-allowance[/STRIKE]

I also think that downgrading your car from a 3.0L to something less thirsty is worth exploring.

Edit: I just realised that in your OP you talk about your partner rather than wife so I assume that means you're not married and therefore can't make use of the marriage allowance. Back to the drawing board.

System

Whatever you can do to save your house must be done. Sell a load of stuff, take another job. Whatever you need to do, going into rented isn't the answer.

lopsyfa

I agree with all the excellent advice above. Don’t sell your house, think of all the house price growth you’ll miss out on while rent and your rent payment will probably be more than your debt interests. Do anything you can to save the house. You also need to think of credit scoring for rentals.

It is probably better to sell the car and use the insurance and fuel savings to reduce the debt. Buy a bus pass and use it to go around - you’ll survive. Better than selling the house.

Also, with the Sky TV, you can usually reduce the expensive bits (HD,sports, box sets and movies) without any penalty. Call them and ask - I did this last year. Once your mobile contracts ends, go SIMO - we pay £15 combined for two fully loaded contracts.

tacpot12

Selling the car and buying something cheaper would also be a good option. You will save on fuel, tax, insurance and maintenance. My 1.8l 55 plate Mondeo cost £900.

Good luck - you can rescue the situation but need to make some sacrifices.

System

Your phones are crippling. I have a deal £34, iPhone 6s (really fast, does everything you need it to) and 12gb of data (which is loads). I use my phone and data a lot so I can't imagine why anyone would need more than that. Unless it's the latest and greatest. Honestly, what's the difference really between an iPhone 6, 7, 8 and X? Just a couple of features.