Can people really take time off work for "stress"?

antonic

As someone who was driven to the brink of suicide by stress (by throwing myself under a train) caused by a manager, its all to real.
I was lucky and came through the other side and made it back to full time employment after 6 months off with stress.

clairebearpr

TELLIT01 wrote: »

Agree totally tizerbelle. I think you've summed the current situation up beautifully. It's like people claiming to be traumatised because the latest Boy Band has broken up! There are people genuinely suffering from depression, stress, PTSD etc who are getting lumped in with the 'snowflakes'.

See, I think your wrong. Imagine you're a teenager, maybe you're being bullied. Maybe you feel alone and this BAND makes you feel less sad and lonely. Imagine liking a boy band, listening to their music makes you feel happier for a little while. You enjoy listening to interviews , looking them up etc. They are the one thing you FEEL you can look forward to. Now imagine that being taken away. It can be traumatising, for some people a Band or tv show or book series can feel like a security blanket. Not everyone KNOWS how to deal with stress or anxiety or depression so they focus on something that makes them feel better. It might not be healthy but it may be the ONLY way they know how to cope at the moment. And yes, this can be the same way for adults also, we develop crutches that may seem stupid and trivial, sometimes they are but like you say, some people don't know how to deal with trauma. So, they bury it and cover it with these trivial things. If these little things are taken it can be the last drop in a glass that causes it to overflow.

Fireflyaway

I have to admit as a manager I used to be skeptical about stress. Same with depression and anxiety. Reason being some people will falsely claim they have these conditions to get time off sick. No blood test or scan will reveal these conditions so they are easy to fake.

Having now experienced work related stress I can tell you it certainly can be real. Due to bullying from a manager my stress began to have physical symptoms. Headaches, sickness, Racing heart, dizziness and being unable to sleep or think clearly. I've worked since the age of 16 and I'm nearly 40. Never felt that way before even though I've worked with difficult people and in difficult circumstances. I wouldn't say I'm particularly emotional and ive been praised for my resilience and strong work ethic. However there is only so much someone can take!

A bit of stress is normal but there is a difference in having a stressful day and actually suffering from stress. Just like someone casually says ' I'm so depressed, I put on a pound this week'. Obviously that's not real depression.

Keep an open mind. There will always be fakers out there but anyone can suffer stress at some point. It's very real and very unpleasant. Someone in a bad place could really do with a smile or an invite for coffee etc. It could literally save someone.

elsien

Out of interest, just wondering why you searched the forum to resurrect a thread which was last active in July for your first post?

FBaby

It's a very difficult line. I've experience stressed in my life for about 25 years. A lot of it, I managed it because it made me resilient. I've seen people going off sick stressed when their level of stress didn't reach half mine. Resilience has of course a lot to do with it.

However, like Firefly, it reached a point when it just got too much. No one denied that I wasn't under unmanageable amount fo stress, everyone felt sorry for me, but nothing was done assuming I'll manage as I always did. This time, it turned physical, exactly as you des ribd Firefly.

It was my clue to do something drastic. I did and 1 year on, my life has never been so unstressful. It should be great but it isn't because its left some damage that I'm really struggling to undo. I am still always tense, on the edge, I still don't sleep well, and just can't seem to relax.

So sadly, it's not just about the intensity but also the prolonged effect.

I do get cross with some people whose resilience lelves are almost non existent, but at the same time, I see some people who I keep going and are on a bomb timer and it's very sad.

Mrs_Ryan

I’ve just gone back to work after 4 weeks off with work related stress/depression. I cried myself to sleep every night before work as I didn’t want to go in. The trigger for me being signed off was crying solidly between leaving work on the Saturday at 1pm until bedtime on the Monday. As I have other physical issues which are exacerbated by high emotion I was quite unwell after that.
My manager thinks she’s my best friend but in fact she’s the cause of my stress/depression. She’s been off sick last week and it has been absolute bliss. However she is now back and I could already feel my hackles rising when I got her email this afternoon- I can’t be bothered at the moment as I’ve got a lot on my plate right now so if she starts on me tomorrow I will just walk out. She knows I have a personality disorder and not to push me but she doesn’t seem to believe this (she’s got a bad rep from her previous workplace as well as there are people who work with me who know her) and seems hell bent on winding me up. I don’t wish to blow at work but she’s really getting on my nerves.

Davidc4

I am currently signed off with stress and have been put on medication. Four other members of my team are also on medication for stress and anxiety with one of them also signed off. 

Strangely the company can't see the issue 🤔

GHolmesAdmin

Stress is indeed a physical as well as a mental condition, if you do not get away from the stressor severe physical symptoms can follow, and yes I am speaking from experience. And the knowledge that once you own up to stress your employer will only want to get rid of you, probably by causing you more stress, and nothing you do will be judged adequate, makes people suffer in silence only exacerbating the initial problem.

JustAnotherSaver

Reading some of this I imagine some of you are from the macho puff your chest out stress doesn’t exist brigade. 

I work with many many of these kinds of people unfortunately. 

Where I am they can heap loads on to you and expect the impossible because you simply don’t have the tools for the job and then you get roasted for not doing it. You’re put in positions where you can either do A or B but it is beyond possibility to come close to doing both but rather than accept this you can be threatened with your job and they seriously go to town on you. It isn’t a case of try harder, it can literally be impossible. 

You can only take so much before you pop and when you do you’re a “soft [insert expletive here]”. 

AW618

Stress is certainly real.  It's not necessarily the job's fault though.   I was stressed by work when I started out because I was in a  job I was completely unsuited to.  That was nobody's fault but mine, so I quit and got a different job which I was much better at and haven't been stressed by work since.  Sometimes it doesn't matter how much time you have off; it's not going to make any difference if the reason for the stress is that you simply are not capable of doing what you are supposed to do.