Legalities around paying back gifts of money

Theaze

A couple of years ago we were in a difficult financial position through no fault of our own. Our house was up for sale and all of our savings were going on debt payments due to the collapse of our business which again happened through no fault of our own.
At the time we weren't speaking to my parents but they decided they wanted to gift us some money to help us out. At the time I told.my husband and my parents I did not want to take the money ( I have returned gifted monies in the past) but the money was transferred into my bank ac and as we were absolutely desperate - about to be made bankrupt and homeless I backed down and accepted . I received a hand written note from them at the time outlining they wanted to help us but I also text them expressing how uncomfortable I felt as we probably wouldn't ever be able to pay back the money.
2 years later we are just getting back on our feet. We still dont speak to my parents.
A year ago I received texts and letters from my father saying his circumstances had changed and he now wanted the money repaying. I ignored the contact as we were unable to do so.
We have since sold a property and the proceeds of which ( all in my name) are again going towards paying off the final debts we have been managing.
In January my husband personally received legal correspondence on behalf of my father. It stated that the money given was apparently a personal loan to my husband to help his business ( his business had already closed when the money was put in my bank ac) and that it had only been deposited in my bank account because my husband didn't have a bank ac- another lie.
It stated that because we had now sold some property my father wanted the money returned.

Where do we stand legally?

There was no contract or even informal signed notice .
He has approached my husband claiming it was a business loan yet we were told the money was a gift to help us out and it went into my account.
We have a hand written note to this effect- that they wanted to help us out so we didn't have to sell.our home.
There are genuine reasons why I have no contact with my parents so , respectively, I'm not requesting advice reflecting the perceived morality of the situation, just the legal position.

[Deleted User]

It's up to them to provide evidence that it was a loan. If needed, a judge would then rule on whether it was or not.

davidwood681

They helped you out when you needed it.

Do the same for them.

After that, you're both in the same position and can see where the relationship ends up.

Edit...Just read your last line.

National_Debtline

Hi Theaze and welcome to MSE,


Unfortunately, the only way to know your legal position is to get some legal advice. There are organisations that can offer cheap/ free legal advice, this is just one you may choose to use www.lawcentres.org.uk


At this stage it sounds as though you are simply being asked to repay (albeit formally asked by a solicitor your parents may have sought their own advice from and/or employed to act on your behalf) and you can either engage and dispute/ negotiate with them now, or ignore it and see if they raise a claim in the county court.


If they do send you claim forms, do not ignore them, get legal advice and respond accordingly. There are free advice services that can advise you how to reply to claim forms if it goes that far.


Laura
@natdebtline

dealer_wins

Legally you dont have to repay them as it was a gift, morally you should though.

[Deleted User]

Seems like there might be a difference between what is legally correct and what is morally the right thing to do. I suppose one question would be if you have children would you like them to treat you in this manner?
I know you may think this is me being harsh but I suspect it will be what others are thinking.

Shakin_Steve

Deleted_User wrote: »

It's up to them to provide evidence that it was a loan. If needed, a judge would then rule on whether it was or not.

Spot on. It really is as simple as that.

antrobus

venison wrote: »

Seems like there might be a difference between what is legally correct and what is morally the right thing to do. I suppose one question would be if you have children would you like them to treat you in this manner?
I know you may think this is me being harsh but I suspect it will be what others are thinking.

Given that the OP states that they have "a hand written note" confirming that the money was a gift, what sort of parent would be prepared to go to court and commit perjury to claim otherwise?

If you have parents, would you like them to treat you in this manner?

sourcrates

I really dont like posts such as this, I dont know your reasons for not speaking to your parents, and I dont want to know, but whatever it is, it didnt stop them coming to your aid when you needed them, you should show them the same courtesy.

boo_star

sourcrates wrote: »

I really dont like posts such as this, I dont know your reasons for not speaking to your parents, and I dont want to know, but whatever it is, it didnt stop them coming to your aid when you needed them, you should show them the same courtesy.

Agreed.

They helped you out despite having no legal obligation to. How about you help them out despite not having a legal obligation to?

stuartJo1989

Wait, hold on a sec...

You say "we weren't speaking to my parents but they decided they wanted to gift us some money to help us out"

How did they find out the following?

- That you were in financial difficulty
- The amount you needed to get straight
- Your bank account details (they might have that saved on their online bank account to be fair)

Seems a bit weird how you weren't on speaking terms, but they cottoned on? I'm thinking that either you DID approach them, or maybe your husband went behind your back a bit (not in a bad way) and contacted them?

Based on other parts of your post (proceedings being issued against your husband + you saying "At the time I told.my husband and my parents") I reckon your husband has made the arrangements with your parents. If that's true then HE might be the one liable, and you can get off scott free without even having to debate whether it was a gift or loan (happy days!). The only rub is that if you don't support your husband through this then he'll likely take off!

Oh and your husband isn't family. And you aren't on speaking terms with your parents. So I'd imagine that it would more likely be a LOAN than a gift, that's fairly common sense.... If you don't get on with someone then you don't really gift them money, you are more likely to LEND them money because you don't like them *that* much. MAYBE it was a gift, but your parents must be absolutely **amazingly** good people to do that (which is a poor reflection on you).

Ultimately, you need to pay it from a moral perspective. But from a legal perspective, you probably need to pay someone for proper advice and you've got at least a 50-50 chance I'd say. I would just be wary about the possibility of stitching up your husband here and stretching your relationship.

Personal comment: This is one of the most depressing things I've ever read on this forum. Makes me appreciate my mum and dad so much more.