Disabled Person Personal Assistant leaving without giving notice

AlisaK

Hi there,

I am posting today on behalf of one of my friend that has been left in a really tricky position by his personal care assistant.

Please find below a short version of his story. He would need help on what to do concerning that situation.

I am a disabled person employing live in carers.

On Friday, one of my employee informed me that she wanted to quit in order to go back to her home country in France as she was feeling home sick.

I told her that I understood her situation but that I would need her to give me the 4 weeks notice in order for me to get a new live in carer. She agreed with it, but then the very same day had a panic attack in front of me because she was becoming to emotional.

On Saturday, as I was talking to her about my plans for the month as she will still be working for me, she started panicking again and hit the wall many times and told me she wanted to hurt herself. I asked her to go for a walk and calm down.
When she came back she was on the phone with her partner that wanted to talk to me which I refused but then I was forced to by my carer. The partner then shouted at me, accusing me of making my carer ill and that she needed to leave straight away. I tried to keep calm but it is hard when someone is shouting in your ear.
I then asked my carer to help me into bed so I ordered her to put her phone down as you cannot work while being on the phone.
She refused, saying that she could work like that. I asked her again to put the phone down, but she refused once more. She then started undressing me, grabbing my arm really violently. I straight away asked her to leave.
She then took my keys and left them on the side before leaving and never coming back.
I was expecting her to leave for an hour or so to calm herself down and then come back, but she just never showed up again.

Ronaldo_Mconaldo

Wind up....

TELLIT01

Working on the basis that it's not a wind-up, there is nothing that can be done to force a person to carry on working if they are insistent that they are leaving that day. The person with the caring needs should concentrate their efforts on getting hold of a new carer.

Malthusian

Find a new carer. Call the police if the other one returns. But it sounds unlikely that the friend will ever hear from them again, thankfully.

BorisThomson

What does your friend want to happen?

If they are an employer then they'll need to pay the carer any outstanding wages and holiday pay. The relationship has clearly broken down so I would not recommend any effort to get the carer to complete her notice period.

Can they ask one of the other carers if they will do some extra hours whilst another is recruited? An agency would be able to provide cover, but that will be more costly than doing it yourself. Social services may be able to offer support in finding a new carer.

PasturesNew

You have rights.
She has rights.

You have issues.
She clearly has issues.....

You'd not want her back in your house. I'd rather eat dry bread for a week and wet myself than have that loon back under my roof.

She assaulted you - that's a matter for the police. She damaged property - that is a matter for the police.

In her fragile mental state you probably came over as "impossible and demanding and incessant".... a "control freak" behaviour. You were disregarding her breakdown and wanted her to carry on working when she was mid-mental-breakdown.

If I were her, in that state, I'd have walked out and never returned. She's done you a favour in that bit. At least, this way, the question isn't how to evict somebody who is violently abusing you in your own home and scares you.

You need to just decide whether to go to the police or not ... and crack on with finding a replacement.

kingfisherblue

The disabled people that I know who employ carers have support from Social Services - they need an assessment to determine how many hours of support they need, they have money from SS to pay the carers, SS arrange for DBS checks, etc.

Assuming that this is not a wind up, the first thing that the friend should do is contact their social worker. It won't be the first time that a vulnerable person has been let down, and there will be some (limited) support available, although this might be in the form of agency staff until a new employee is found. They can help (via the Direct Payments finances department at the council) to ascertain how much is due in wages and holiday pay, and can, if necessary, arrange an additional payment to cover short term increased costs such as agency workers.

SS can also support the disabled person in informing the police of assault, if he wants to go down that path.

martinsurrey

PasturesNew wrote: »

You have rights.
She has rights.

You have issues.
She clearly has issues.....

You'd not want her back in your house. I'd rather eat dry bread for a week and wet myself than have that loon back under my roof.

She assaulted you - that's a matter for the police. She damaged property - that is a matter for the police.

In her fragile mental state you probably came over as "impossible and demanding and incessant".... a "control freak" behaviour. You were disregarding her breakdown and wanted her to carry on working when she was mid-mental-breakdown.

If I were her, in that state, I'd have walked out and never returned. She's done you a favour in that bit. At least, this way, the question isn't how to evict somebody who is violently abusing you in your own home and scares you.

You need to just decide whether to go to the police or not ... and crack on with finding a replacement.

Don't forget that we've only heard one side of the story.

The OP even said

"I tried to keep calm but it is hard when someone is shouting in your ear. "

But doesn't elaborate on what they did or said!

OP, you best bet is to pay her what she's owed (pay to leaving day and holiday pay owed) and then move on, try and force her back or anything like that and she'll be off ill for her 4 weeks notice, with extra costs to you, without the benefit of any work getting done (she would easily get a doctors note for stress based on what you have said).

FBaby

It sounds like she could have been signed off sick, in which case, she would still not have been in a position to provide care in the coming days.

fraserbooks

The whole story sounds a bit fishy but it does raise a few important issues. Any one in that sort of situation should have a back up plan if a carer does not turn up, has an accident, falls I'll or indeed walks out mid shift. A good nursing agency will often be able to provide staff at short notice.

jobbingmusician

Yes, I do feel that two different issues are becoming confused in the OP's mind here (or potentially could be confused. It may be that the OP is fine about this, in which case I am posting for the benefit of others reading this thread.)

1. The fact that the carer has walked off without giving notice. Yes, very annoying, but if they have definitely resigned without giving notice, then it is possible you don't have to pay them notice pay. (You do, however, have to pay them any holiday you owe. BUT if they have caused you any liabilities or ADDITIONAL expense by walking out, you could pursue them for this.)

2. The fact that your carer has suddenly gone off sick. And this is what sounds to have happened, that your carer has suddenly found that they can't cope any more. Anyone can break a limb/be run over by a bus etc. at any time. God forbid, and all that, but it's not worth confusing a sudden sickness with your anger at the carer walking out. Treat it as a sudden illness and do the best you can to cope on that basis. And consider any contingency plans you can for the future - would Social Svcs help with this?