It's all such a mess and I don't know where to turn

Scarlett.1974

Warning - this could get VERY long!

Hi everyone,

We're in a Big Mess and I don't know what to do. There's (a LOT) more going out than coming in and I just can't make it work any more. I'm sat here crying (so please excuse any typos) and I feel sick to my stomach because I just can't see any way out.

Some brief history:
My H is not working at the moment, due to ill-health. He did receive some 'pay-off' from his previous job, but that's long since gone. He was able to make some money to help towards the bills by playing on-line poker, but that's now gone tits-up and he can't play anymore because he hasn't got the funds. He is now desperately trying to find work, although neither of us are 100% sure he's well enough - but even if he does get a job I can't see us being massively better off because we'll lose our tax credits & his sickness money as soon as he is working - this comes to almost £800 and the sort of jobs he's able to do don't pay much more than about £1000 per month.

We have been living the last few months with 1) his poker money and 2) credit cards and 3) help from parents. But we've really no-where else to go now, we've exhausted all our options. H is already on a DMP (is that what it's called?) with payplan, which *does* help a bit, he pays them £100 per month for all his debt (CC's, loans) and I'm wondering if that's what I should do too. I'm going to do our SOA in a minute for you and ALL the CC and loan debt is in my name only. I'm confused about DMP's, IVA's and all the other terms. I've even looked int0 bankruptcy as a possible option, but the thought of losing our home breaks my heart in 2. I have 2 children and he has 1 from his first marriage.

The long & short of it is this - we have the money in our account to cover this month's bills and the mortgage company have kindly given us a payment holiday for November, but come this time next month we're going to be in serious trouble :sad: I have already asked First Plus (you'll see that below in our SOA) if they can help in anyway, reduced payments or anything, but they said they cannot because our loan with them is less than 12 months old.

Anyhoo, this is getting very long and I don't want to bore you good people any more than I have to, so here it is <deep breath>, our SOA: (I know you guys like a challenge; if anyone can suggest any ways out of this mess I'll be impressed).

Statement of Affairs

Incoming:
H sickness benefit - £244
My salary - £700 (net)
Tax Credit - £545
DLA (for my son) - £172
Child Benefit - £121
Maintenance for daughter - £120

Total - £1902


Outgoing:
Mortgage - £527
First plus loan - £476 (secured on the house )
Council tax - £90
Gas services (maintenence plan, we really need this as our boiler breaks down frequently) - £14
Gas - £45
Electric - £34
Water - £40
Life Insurance - £60
House insurance (contents & buildings) - £36
TV Licence - £11
Sky - £55 (am trying to convince H to reduce this to a lesser package)
Internet - £10
HFC (sofa) - £49
BT phone - £17
My mobile - £30
H mobile - £25
Daughter mobile - £15
Pet insurance - £7
Food - £400 (I am working to try and reduce this to £300 of less)
H payplan payment - £100
H car payment - £135
H maintenance payment - £20 (supposed to be £175, but his ex-wife is kindly accepting reduced payments at the moment)
NSPCC payment - £2
Inland revenue (for overpaid tax credits) - £10 (approx. £1200 still to pay)
Tesco loan - £125 (£5000 outstanding, only took out in July, over 5 years)
Next directory - £130 (£1600 outstanding)
Llloyds CC - £120 (£6000 outstanding)
Virgin CC - £90 (£3000 outstanding)
Egg CC - £30 (£1100 outstanding)
Barclaycard - £15 (£500 outstanding)
Additions - £15 (£170 outstanding)
Freemans - £40 (£130 outstanding)
Overdraft interest - £56 (£4000 OD)

Total: £2829

A couple of points - all our mobiles are on the lowest tarrfis available to us. You will also see that I haven't included any other car expenses - H's parents kindly paid for a years insurance & tax last month for us, so we don't need to worry about that for a while. The car currently has almost a full tank of petrol, when that runs out I don't know what we're going to do frankly.

I'm sorry this is soooooo long, but I've tried to give all the relevant information. If I've missed anything out that you need to know, then please ask.

Am going for a little cry now......

Thanks for reading,
Scarlett xx

RoxieW

Hi Scarlett

I just wanted to give you a quick hug and say hi. I'm sure lots of lovely people are looking at your SOA's and will post advice for you as quickly as they can. I'll have a good look in a second but I just wanted to say hi first, i really feel your despair - it seems like you're trying to hold things together for your family - and have been doing for a while - and now its all too much. while you're low - remember you're in the best place and things are about to get better.

Cheery_Daff

Oh scarlett, have a hug (((((Scarlett))))) Sit yourself down with a cuppa, you'll feel better.

Some lovely people will be along soon to help. I'm sure there's plenty you can do - I don't know much about insurances and things, but someone will.

You're right, you can reduce your food bill by a lot - when you've sat and had a cuppa, go and look at the Old Style board, they'll help you find much cheaper ways of eating.

And you need to contact one of the free debt charities, like CCCS (I think! Again, someone else will be along with proper details). They'll contact creditors for you, and help you work out a payment plan you can afford.

Don't worry, there is a way out, honestly.

Sit tight with your cuppa, and wait for the lovely people to help

Daffs
xxx

the_cat

Hi and welcome to MSE.

Well done for posting, try not to worry, the advise will soon come flooding in.
Grab a cuppa and take a few deep breaths, honestly you have done the hardest bit.

My first thought was your husband's health. I think he should establish whether it is right for him to consider work yet. Perhaps a trip to discuss the matter with your GP? Remember at the end of the day that money is no substitute for his health and dashing back to work in a panic will not help you in the longer term.

I'm afraid I don't know a lot about IVA, DMP etc either but I would suggest you get in touch with either CCCS or Payplan for free help with your finances. Most on here have found them extremely helpful and they can go through everything with you and deal with your creditors too.

Certainly there are lots of areas in your budget which can be cut - sky, food mobiles etc but as their is a large deficit this in itself will not be enough to turn things around. Get some advise on the big picture first and the rest can fall into place around it.

Hugs, Cat

EDIT Crikey just crossed posted with the 2 above - we like our tea on here don't we!!!!!

Floss

Scarlett.1974 wrote: »

Warning - this could get VERY long!


Statement of Affairs

Incoming:
H sickness benefit - £244
My salary - £700 (net)
Tax Credit - £545
DLA (for my son) - £172
Child Benefit - £121
Maintenance for daughter - £120

Total - £1902


Outgoing:
Mortgage - £527
First plus loan - £476 (secured on the house )
Council tax - £90 do you pay over 10 or 12m?
Gas services (maintenence plan, we really need this as our boiler breaks down frequently) - £14
Gas - £45 is this the cheapest tariff for you?
Electric - £34
Water - £40
Life Insurance - £60 seems high - is there any reason (sorry for asking)?
House insurance (contents & buildings) - £36 is this the cheapest you could get? When due shoop around & use Quidco for cashback
TV Licence - £11
Sky - £55 (am trying to convince H to reduce this to a lesser package) cut it down, get onto a bundle with internet & phone (see Martin's article for info)
Internet - £10 see above
BT phone - £17 see above
My mobile - £30 drop a tariff or go PAYG as soon as you can
H mobile - £25 ditto
Daughter mobile - £15 does she NEED this?
Pet insurance - £7
Food - £400 (I am working to try and reduce this to £300 of less) look on Old Style board for help
H payplan payment - £100 what for?
H car payment - £135 do you need the car?
H maintenance payment - £20 (supposed to be £175, but his ex-wife is kindly accepting reduced payments at the moment) Does it go thru CSA? Do they know he's on benefits?
NSPCC payment - £2 sorry, but for the moment you are the charity

HFC (sofa) - £49 how much do you owe on this?
Inland revenue (for overpaid tax credits) - £10 (approx. £1200 still to pay)
Tesco loan - £125 (£5000 outstanding, only took out in July, over 5 years)
Next directory - £130 (£1600 outstanding)
Llloyds CC - £120 (£6000 outstanding)
Virgin CC - £90 (£3000 outstanding)
Egg CC - £30 (£1100 outstanding)
Barclaycard - £15 (£500 outstanding)
Additions - £15 (£170 outstanding)
Freemans - £40 (£130 outstanding)
Overdraft interest - £56 (£4000 OD)

Total: £2829

A couple of points - all our mobiles are on the lowest tarrfis available to us. You will also see that I haven't included any other car expenses - H's parents kindly paid for a years insurance & tax last month for us, so we don't need to worry about that for a while. The car currently has almost a full tank of petrol, when that runs out I don't know what we're going to do frankly.

Ok, take a deep breath.
Make a list of what you have in your cupboards, fridge & freezer. Then plan as many meals as you can from that, buying as little as possible. Then plan your meals for a week at a time, only buying what you need for that week's menus.
Start a spending diary to keep track of the bits & bobs that get frittered away on papers, chocolate etc.
Have you thought about contacting Payplan & explaining to them your suituation? Do they manage all your debts?

:grouphug:

Floss xx

Scarlett.1974

Thank you Roxie and Cheery Daff. You've made me cry (more!), but in a nice way. It's good to know that people care.

I just feel sick every time I look at our SOA - it's such a massive difference from what's coming in and what's going out........ but it's the first time I've actually worked it all out and I suppose acceptance is the first step, right?

Thanks again for your kindness, you have no idea what it means to me.

xx

Shineyhappy

I am afraid that I am going to sound a bit harsh, but there are quite a lot of savings to be made and to be honest I think its better to go without a few luxuries that constantly worry about debt and being harressed by loan companies

Outgoing:
Mortgage - £527 - can you turn this to interest only for a while?
First plus loan - £476 (secured on the house )
Council tax - £90
Gas services (maintenence plan, we really need this as our boiler breaks down frequently) - £14
Gas - £45- go through quidco and uswitch and see if gas/electric are the cheapest available
Electric - £34
Water - £40- would it be cheaper to get a water meter installed?
Life Insurance - £60- go through quidco this seems expensive
House insurance (contents & buildings) - £36 as above
TV Licence - £11
Sky - £55 (am trying to convince H to reduce this to a lesser package)- get a freeview box and ditch
Internet - £10
HFC (sofa) - £49
BT phone - £17
My mobile - £30
H mobile - £25- do you need to spend 87 pounds a month, 1044 pounds a year on 4 phones?
Daughter mobile - £15
Pet insurance - £7
Food - £400 (I am working to try and reduce this to £300 of less) Go to the Old School board and aim to halve it, also look at the living off smart price food challenge on here
H payplan payment - £100
H car payment - £135
H maintenance payment - £20 (supposed to be £175, but his ex-wife is kindly accepting reduced payments at the moment)
NSPCC payment - £2- cancel
Inland revenue (for overpaid tax credits) - £10 (approx. £1200 still to pay)
Tesco loan - £125 (£5000 outstanding, only took out in July, over 5 years)
Next directory - £130 (£1600 outstanding)
Llloyds CC - £120 (£6000 outstanding)
Virgin CC - £90 (£3000 outstanding)
Egg CC - £30 (£1100 outstanding)
Barclaycard - £15 (£500 outstanding)
Additions - £15 (£170 outstanding)
Freemans - £40 (£130 outstanding)
Overdraft interest - £56 (£4000 OD)

Total: £2829

Also look at ways of bringing in extra cash, whislt hubby is at home can he Ebay unwanted items, Amazon books, join up to online surveys, mystery shopping? Have a look at cash back sites Quidco, Topcashback and there are ways of making free cash to signing up for free trials of DVDs, Experian etc and as long as you remember to cancel them within the free period then you will be making money for nothing.

I know this will all only help to a certain extent but if you ever hope to be debt free then you will need to cut back a bit or you will be on a DMP for ages.

Hope I have been of some help! Good luck sorting through this.

(Land_of)_Maz

Scarlett.1974 wrote: »

Warning - this could get VERY long! - S'okay, we like detail hun!


Statement of Affairs

Incoming:
H sickness benefit - £244
My salary - £700 (net)
Tax Credit - £545
DLA (for my son) - £172
Child Benefit - £121
Maintenance for daughter - £120

Total - £1902 - this is not too bad. Think positively.


Outgoing:
Mortgage - £527
First plus loan - £476 (secured on the house )
Council tax - £90
Gas services (maintenence plan, we really need this as our boiler breaks down frequently) - £14
Gas - £45 - check for cheaper via Quidco, get cashback and switch
Electric - £34 -as above
Water - £40
Life Insurance - £60 - as above
House insurance (contents & buildings) - £36 - as above
TV Licence - £11 - a necessary evil
Sky - £55 (am trying to convince H to reduce this to a lesser package) - keep trying!
Internet - £10 - a necessity!
HFC (sofa) - £49
BT phone - £17
My mobile - £30 - you say you're on the cheapest... can you cancel any contracts? There are plenty free sims available if you can keep the phones.
H mobile - £25 - as above
Daughter mobile - £15 - how old is she, PAYG i'm guessing...
Pet insurance - £7
Food - £400 (I am working to try and reduce this to £300 of less) - well done. Go old school and you will chop this in half.
H payplan payment - £100
H car payment - £135
H maintenance payment - £20 (supposed to be £175, but his ex-wife is kindly accepting reduced payments at the moment) - Nice woman! - see my other comment below though.
NSPCC payment - £2 - It's only little but consider stopping this.
Inland revenue (for overpaid tax credits) - £10 (approx. £1200 still to pay) - ask them to drop to £5... explain situtation. Have you appealled anyway, maybe you can lose this.
Tesco loan - £125 (£5000 outstanding, only took out in July, over 5 years)
Next directory - £130 (£1600 outstanding)
Llloyds CC - £120 (£6000 outstanding)
Virgin CC - £90 (£3000 outstanding)
Egg CC - £30 (£1100 outstanding)
Barclaycard - £15 (£500 outstanding)
Additions - £15 (£170 outstanding)
Freemans - £40 (£130 outstanding)
Overdraft interest - £56 (£4000 OD) - DO NONE OF THESE GET COVERED WITH YOUR HUSBANDS PAYPLAN? CAN THEY BE ADDED IN? - not shouting, sorry! Just trying to encompass all of above.

Are the debts your OH paying all his, or were they his ex wifes as well?

Total: £2829

A couple of points - all our mobiles are on the lowest tarrfis available to us. You will also see that I haven't included any other car expenses - H's parents kindly paid for a years insurance & tax last month for us, so we don't need to worry about that for a while. Godlove the in-laws, eh! That was sweet of them.
The car currently has almost a full tank of petrol, when that runs out I don't know what we're going to do frankly. - Start walking now, you can make that last all month and some, if you conserve petrol now.

I'm sorry this is soooooo long, but I've tried to give all the relevant information. If I've missed anything out that you need to know, then please ask. Try not to rely on gambling. Even if he is really good at it, it isn't the best way to make money. Noone can win all the time... Check out the matched betting threads and see if he can make some money by beating the system. ONCE you have some money to "play with".

Am going for a little cry now...... - Aww sweetie, don't worry, you'll get tons of great advice here. You've taken the first step so onwards and upwards.

Thanks for reading,
Scarlett xx

Take care for now, and you'll get loads of help here,

Maz

Floss

It IS the first step, but once you've taken that, it WILL get easier (even though it may not seem it at times!)

Take some time to think about maybe Ebaying anything you can, doing a car-boot before they stop for winter, maybe getting rid of some of the kids old toys? That would probably give you some immediate cash + some Paypal money for clothes for the kids or Christmas pressies.

Also take a look at Pigsback for earning vouchers for Boots etc...take a look at this thread for help. Maybe your OH could do stuff like that & Ebay listing while you are at work? It may help him feel he is contributing a bit to the household too. http://forums.moneysavingexpert.com/showthread.html?t=564858&highlight=pigsback

Scarlett.1974

Hi Floss,

I'll try and answer all your questions

Re: the mobiles - we're all on the lowest tarrifs available to us at the moment (I have contacted the providers and got mine lowered) H & I are with Orange and daughter is with 3. We're all tied into contracts too, they are all up for renewal at around the same time, next April/May, so I don't think there's much we can do with those until then?

We've recently moved from Orange to Sky for the internet (from £28 a month to £10, every little helps right?!), so I guess we're tied into a set term with them, but I'll definitely look into that, thanks

H's manitenance does not go through the CSA, it was part of the divorce/court agreement from his divorce. Like I said, it's supposed to be £175, but the ex is kindly accepting reduced payments for now.

I'll cancel the NSPCC DD

Life insurance - that's to cover the house if either of us die. I think that's the cheapest we can get because we're both smokers <blush>.

Gas bill - we have the old-fashioned blow-air heating and it guzzles gas unfortunately, but obviously at the moment replacing it is not an option

House insurance - has just been renewed (well, August), so not much I can do there at the moment.

Thank you for taking the time to reply

Scarlett.1974

Gosh, lots more replies, you guys are great.

I'm not the fatest typer in the world, so bare with me and I'll read the new replies now and reply as quick as I can