New member. Lots of Debt. Help please

EssexHebridean

sun_city_girl wrote: »

There were lots of spends I didn't add to the SOA as it didn't really have a space for it, and it was extra spending - things we really don't need. Other parts of it I added up directly from my bank statements, clothing and grocery spend. We have been keep tracking of our spending but I think it seems I don't know I guess a bit too stingy to tell me that I shouldn't spend £21 on gym a month when I'm completely over spending on groceries and clothes. I think my issues is really just budgeting than the money not coming in but obviously I want to try and decrease the debts too. I think it's possible with our currently spends but obviously having to not buy coffees and clothes and beers we don't need, rather than giving up my gym membership (which is cheap!) :-(

OK - an SOA needs to be accurate - otherwise it's utterly pointless. Your first pass at it also needs to reflect your current situation as it is NOT what you *think* you should be spending. The whole point is initially to show you where your money is currently going - subsequent revisions happen as you identify savings and it will eventually turn into a final version which will be your "budget bible".

Second - you might re-read your last sentence there - so your gym membership is an essential but his beer isn't? Hmmm? A wee bit harsh possibly expecting him to cut out his luxury/fun spending when you're determined that yours should stay? Maybe you might have more success with getting him on board as well if you're content to prove that you're also happy to make sacrifices - just a thought.

sun_city_girl

EssexHebridean wrote: »

OK - an SOA needs to be accurate - otherwise it's utterly pointless. Your first pass at it also needs to reflect your current situation as it is NOT what you *think* you should be spending. The whole point is initially to show you where your money is currently going - subsequent revisions happen as you identify savings and it will eventually turn into a final version which will be your "budget bible".

Second - you might re-read your last sentence there - so your gym membership is an essential but his beer isn't? Hmmm? A wee bit harsh possibly expecting him to cut out his luxury/fun spending when you're determined that yours should stay? Maybe you might have more success with getting him on board as well if you're content to prove that you're also happy to make sacrifices - just a thought.

We both drink beer and go to the gym! I think he would prefer being healthier and drinking less beer. It's not cheap beer bottles are between £4-£10!

wegle

Well done for facing up to things and deciding to make a change. Your next big step in this is to get your other half on board. There is no way that one of you can change the whole financial situation of the family. It has to be a team effort.

I'd really recommend using the YNAB budgeting software and app. I've been using it since January and I've gone from a zero bank balance at the end of every month to a balance today of £1400. The best thing is though all that money is already ear marked for specific jobs so I'm not tempted to go out and splurge it all. YNAB works like a virtual envelope system. When you get paid you virtually put your money into different envelopes with their purpose written on them. For example each month I put £20 into my Christmas envelope and £25 into my entertainment envelope. Every time I want to spend something from that category I log it on the app and it reduces the balance of that envelope by the amount that I have spent. It's single handedly stopped me buying expensive coffees. You really think twice about spending £4 on a coffee when you've only got £10 in your treats envelope later and you know you'd probably like a glass of wine later in the evening.

You can achieve the same sort of system by setting up multiple bank accounts or even creating a spreadsheet that you keep updated. I'm a smartphone addict though so apps work best for me. You'll find that your budget will be a living thing that changes many times throughout the months and years, however the most important thing is to keep on top of it, to embrace your true expenses. I even put £2 a month into my "Work Tea Fund" envelope. Every piece of money I spend is categorised and budgeted for somewhere.

Good luck, posting here and keeping yourself accountable is a great way to stay on track and focused.