References

Miss_Heartilly

So as many of you may remember I am looking for paid work within a charity shop starting off as a retail assistant and then in the future possibly going into charity shop management.

The problem is my references are non-existent in a way.

For example the first place i worked for over 13 years ago has closed down and i am not sure how to go about contacting managers, i was only there 12 months so I doubt they'll even remember me anyways.

My second place of employment insists on only a written reference as he doesn't speak good english (obviously better at writing it although it does make you laugh in parts as it's almost as if a child has written it.) for example he wrote 'Miss Heartilly likes to learn and has a big heart and is kind to everybody however but has two boys who can be a handful i am not used to how boisterous these boys can be as in China children are more respectful. Another example he wrote is 'Miss Heartilly has a mother who worked in the chip shop too, she was hard of hearing but her husband didn't mind her working. Women working is much different in UK then it is in China, women are very opinionated and challenging, and this is my first year managing staff, I am still learning the ways.' Then he spends 2 paragraphs complaining about how the local council runs it services. <--- as if that has anything to do with me lol. So as you can see due to differences in culture this reference comes across as a bit like :doh::doh::think::think: so not sure if it will be taken seriously. If you ever met this man you'd see how strange he is. He won't let me give out his number as he says he hates being called. And all he can do is a written reference.

Then my third employer a job I had in a nursing home last year just never answers my request or anyones request for a reference. I was only doing bank work there so only did 13 shifts there.

My first volunteering experience would be awkward to get a reference from. I volunteered twice a week for CAB (citizens advice bureau) but due to the way the volunteer co-ordinator spoke to me because I was 10 minutes late one day (the train was late ) amongst other things like giving other people credit for work I had helped with and giving others better tasks to do while I had more experience and was stuck with boring tasks I decided to leave. I sent the co-ordinator a email expressing my concerns so feel weird asking for a reference. Even though I know i did nothing wrong.

Then my more recent volunteering experience in a charity shop.. if anyone has read my last thread you will all know that my manager has took a disliking to me to the point he wont even offer me training and seems to train everyone other than me. He obviously doesn't agree with a decision I made when running the shop so is holding it against me. So not sure if i will get a good reference of him. Even though I work my socks off 3 days a week and even came in while my son was injured in hospital.

Does anybody have any suggestions or advice. As I would really love to get a job ASAP without lack of references letting me down.

ScorpiondeRooftrouser

For a start, never show that chip shop reference to anybody. Burn it.

How long did you work in the chip shop. If it wasn't long then you have worked, for the look of it, for a handful of months in 13 years.

Working for a few months in 13 years is not materially different to not working at all.

You would be better off saying that you haven't worked at all, for whatever reason it is that you have hardly worked which you will have to explain anyway, and then not be bothered about references.

If on the other hand you worked for a long time in the chip shop go back and ask him to simply write your dates of employment and that your work was satisfactory. Surely he can do this.

xapprenticex

Yes, my Chnese colleague (actually born and raised there) says things that would get us in trouble if we said it. Stuff like "Women should be in the kitchen", "Why are women here, you should be a wife at home", "learn to cook" etc and he doesnt take banter very well though he laughs in hysterics at random minor things that leave us scratching our heads. Has a bit of a temper when you wind him up too much but he's only like 5 and half foot and probably weighs 7 stone, Top guy though.

Fireflyaway

A lot of referees don't go into much detail because they don't want to be responsible for you not getting the job and then you raise a case against them.
I know you didn't get on with the volunteer coordinator at CAB but if your work was up to standard I don't see why she wouldn't write you a reference. Same for your current place. You might be frustrated with the manager and being overlooked, but you have been dedicated and hardworking so I'd put them down. Most jobs will find it strange if you don't use current or most recent employer. If you miss them out and use a really old one it looks like you are hiding something.

Miss_Heartilly

[QUOTE=ScorpiondeRooftrouser;72599373

How long did you work in the chip shop. If it wasn't long then you have worked, for the look of it, for a handful of months in 13 years.

.[/QUOTE]

I worked there for about 2 years, until he decided to give half my hours to a new employee that had just started. I had to leave then as I was financially better off being on benefits and I could no longer afford my rent with what he was paying me.

I haven't really worked since as i struggled to find jobs, I'd apply for them but would never here back. Then my children were born so i decided to be a stay at home mum while their dad went back to work full-time.

Miss_Heartilly

xapprenticex wrote: »

Yes, my Chnese colleague (actually born and raised there) says things that would get us in trouble if we said it. Stuff like "Women should be in the kitchen", "Why are women here, you should be a wife at home", "learn to cook" etc and he doesnt take banter very well though he laughs in hysterics at random minor things that leave us scratching our heads. Has a bit of a temper when you wind him up too much but he's only like 5 and half foot and probably weighs 7 stone, Top guy though.

This sounds exactly like my ex-boss, almost word for word. He would often laugh at random things and come out with sexist marks. He even once told me to lose weight as british women were too fat. I was only a size 10 as well.

Miss_Heartilly

Fireflyaway wrote: »

A lot of referees don't go into much detail because they don't want to be responsible for you not getting the job and then you raise a case against them.
I know you didn't get on with the volunteer coordinator at CAB but if your work was up to standard I don't see why she wouldn't write you a reference. Same for your current place. You might be frustrated with the manager and being overlooked, but you have been dedicated and hardworking so I'd put them down. Most jobs will find it strange if you don't use current or most recent employer. If you miss them out and use a really old one it looks like you are hiding something.

I get what you are saying. They don't want to be blamed for me getting the job but I think in a way not writing much or nothing at all is also hindering my chances. Might explain why nobody ever gets back to me after i have filled out job applications.

I have nothing to hide at all, but I suppose some things may not look good if they are blown out of proportion, for example the time i was late by 10 minutes for the volunteering position and the way I quit by email. (But it was the only way I could express myself at the time) and with the manager at the charity shop he could mention that I can't be trusted as I asked somebody I knew very well to check I had done the till correctly as I had to rush out to the hospital short notice as my son had been took there by his school. So had like 20 minutes to get all customers out the shop (there were loads in so took awhile) then i had to cash up the till (i was rushing) and tidy up shop and lock it up and pull down the shutters and hand the keys in to shop down the street. I was short staffed that day as there was only me in so was quite stressed as i was worried about my son. so everything was rush rush, but the other manager said i'd done a good job but the manager in question has been off with me ever since, giving me boring jobs to do with alot less responsibility. I would hate if he mentioned this situation to a new potential boss. I'm enthuastic and a hard worker and don't think i should be judged by one mistake that ended up turning out all right in the end. But i can see why he is being the way he is.