Suspended from work

Spittingmad

Hi, my partner is currently suspended from work pending an investigation. Her terms of suspension prevent her from making contact with any colleague. I am being told that although I have a relationship outside of work with my partner and she works with me I am not allowed any contact with her nor is she with me. I tried to clarify this point given we cohabit and are due to go on holiday in 7 days time but the same answer was given.


I feel this is an unreasonable condition to enforced given we are in a relationship. If I don't comply I could be disciplined further for non compliance as well she could also lose full pay while suspended.


The other element of this is my partner is 5 weeks pregnant and the stress of this situation has possibly caused a miscarriage according to the GP.


The suspension letter was worded in such a way that the suspension implies that the investigator has prejudged as it also details that my partner has been accused of a gross misconduct offence not just the allegations. Surely the investigation should determine the potential offences and the suspension should be a neutral act not imply guilt?


My partner has been asked today by email to prove she is pregnant. Can they ask her to prove this, her GP stated they will not provide information until a later date and was shocked at the question. In addition why would this be relevant in a case where I the allegations are in relation to 'Obscene Behaviour' and 'serious breakdown in trust'? I feel that my partner is at serious risk being discriminated against if I answer the pregnancy question.


Any advice would be much appreciated

Takeaway_Addict

Spittingmad wrote: »

Hi, my partner is currently suspended from work pending an investigation. Her terms of suspension prevent her from making contact with any colleague. I am being told that although I have a relationship outside of work with my partner and she works with me I am not allowed any contact with her nor is she with me. I tried to clarify this point given we cohabit and are due to go on holiday in 7 days time but the same answer was given.


I feel this is an unreasonable condition to enforced given we are in a relationship. If I don't comply I could be disciplined further for non compliance as well she could also lose full pay while suspended.


The other element of this is my partner is 5 weeks pregnant and the stress of this situation has possibly caused a miscarriage according to the GP.


The suspension letter was worded in such a way that the suspension implies that the investigator has prejudged as it also details that my partner has been accused of a gross misconduct offence not just the allegations. Surely the investigation should determine the potential offences and the suspension should be a neutral act not imply guilt?


My partner has been asked today by email to prove she is pregnant. Can they ask her to prove this, her GP stated they will not provide information until a later date and was shocked at the question. In addition why would this be relevant in a case where I the allegations are in relation to 'Obscene Behaviour' and 'serious breakdown in trust'? I feel that my partner is at serious risk being discriminated against if I answer the pregnancy question.


Any advice would be much appreciated

You'll prob find that if she does say she is pregnant most employers would actually tread alot more carefully, some will of course go completely the other way.

But its not an unreasonable question to ask if you're claiming the stress has caused a miscarriage? Should they just take your word on it?

And it really depends on what she is being accused of. If it is of theft for example then its fine to say this could be gross misconduct if found guilty of the accusation. EDIT- Just reread the bottom, obscene behaviour could be GM so to state this I can't see an issue with.

I can't see how the employer can enforce the no contact with someone the person suspended with lives with.

xapprenticex

Sorry about the miscarriage.

What did she do?

KrankieLad

xapprenticex wrote: »

Sorry about the miscarriage.

What did she do?

I'm not sure we'll find out.

Tiddlywinks

Spittingmad wrote: »

The other element of this is my partner is 5 weeks pregnant and the stress of this situation has possibly caused a miscarriage according to the GP.

My partner has been asked today by email to prove she is pregnant. Can they ask her to prove this, her GP stated they will not provide information until a later date and was shocked at the question.

I'm struggling to accept that a GP would say that xxx happened as a direct result of work related stress.... that's just not something that a GP could back up.

! in 4 pregnancies ends in a miscarriage and often the cause is completely unknown. At 5 weeks there is no way the GP could give a reason.

Please look here for information:

https://www.tommys.org/our-organisation/why-we-exist/miscarriage-statistics

You need to move away from this allegation for a number of reasons.... primarily as it will cause you bitterness to lay blame where it very probably doesn't belong (hence the employer's request for 'proof') and, secondly, because it will appear you are trying to deflect attention away from the investigation by waving unsubstantiated allegations around.

pioneer22

Tiddlywinks wrote: »

I'm struggling to accept that a GP would say that xxx happened as a direct result of work related stress.... that's just not something that a GP could back up.

! in 4 pregnancies ends in a miscarriage and often the cause is completely unknown. At 5 weeks there is no way the GP could give a reason.

Please look here for information:

https://www.tommys.org/our-organisation/why-we-exist/miscarriage-statistics

You need to move away from this allegation for a number of reasons.... primarily as it will cause you bitterness to lay blame where it very probably doesn't belong (hence the employer's request for 'proof') and, secondly, because it will appear you are trying to deflect attention away from the investigation by waving unsubstantiated allegations around.

Are you a doctor? A GP could say the stress is a likely cause of miscarriage......which it is when 9/10 women with increased cortisol levels miscarry.

Cortisol does incredible things to the body

Tiddlywinks

pioneer22 wrote: »

A GP could say the stress is a likely cause of miscarriage......which it is when 9/10 women with increased cortisol levels miscarry.

Cortisol does incredible things to the body

Raised levels of cortisol are natural during pregnancy. You are conflating two theories and mashing up stats... like saying that people with a heartbeat are likely to suffer a heart attack.

Not wanting to go off-topic too much but there is no way a GP could evidence the cause of a 5 week pregnancy miscarriage without commissioning extensive tests.

http://www.nhs.uk/Conditions/Miscarriage/Pages/Causes.aspx

So, it would not be sensible to continue this accusation / assertion during the disciplinary process unless the GP is able to provide absolute proof.... anyway stats don't evidence cause in individual cases - you need expert opinion for that (particularly when making accusations of corporate culpability).

Plus, is it really in the best interests of the OP's partner's mental wellbeing to go down this route?

seashore22

Agreed.

Early miscarriages are incredibly common and I suspect that it's only the sensitivity of early testing that makes women more aware of them. A doctor would be very foolish to ascribe such an event to stress.

TELLIT01

xapprenticex wrote: »

What did she do?

Of absolutely no relevance to the questions posed by the OP.

tacpot12

Regarding not being allowed contact with your partner because they are also a colleague is unreasonable. If you employer wanted to put you up in a hotel and refund the cost of the holiday, that might be different. I would write a letter to HR confirming that you will have contact with your partner and will provide moral support to her but will not discuss any aspect of the investigation that includes your knowledge of the workplace. You need to put your partner first but try to respect your employer's needs at the same time.

Guest101

pioneer22 wrote: »

Are you a doctor? A GP could say the stress is a likely cause of miscarriage......which it is when 9/10 women with increased cortisol levels miscarry.

Cortisol does incredible things to the body

GPs would never state that the cause of X was Y without being able to prove it.


Typically a GP could say: I believe that Y (e.g. stress) could have had a contributing factor to X (the miscarriage). However they would avoid saying that the stress was down to a particular situation (e.g. work)