DMP Mutual Support Thread - Part 12

kram

Hi Amandadwi
I'm new to all this myself, please hang on someone with a lot more knowledge will be able to point you in the right direction soon.
All I can say is it does get better.
Good luck
K

Amandadwi

thanku Kram, I think I understand the process - I have done a lot of reading! Am just scared to take that fist step.
Have seen some amazing diaries and can see it does get better.

January2015

Amandadwi wrote: »

Hi, I have been following this thread for the last few weeks.
Two months ago my husband left the family home due to mental illness leaving me with a big mortgage and £42000 worth of debts in my name, but built together. I have struggled on trying to pay but realistically I cannot afford it. Each month I am having to use my credit cards to pay for food and petrol. Each months my debts are growing and it's really scaring me. I cannot sleep or eat properly.
I have been on SC page and done their debt remedy tool which suggested a dmp. I have a good income but with 3 children it doesn't go far.
I have then spent the last week talking to my friend about my options and reading this thread and some diaries. Some days I feel strong and ready to take that step and some days panicking, worrying that I will loose my house or my parents will find out. I am deeply ashamed but know living as we are at the moment is not fair on the children as they are going without.
I think what i am scared about is cancelling those first payements. I have never missed a payement ever. However they are due out on the 1st and I cannot afford another month with out further increasing my debt. I have no one here to support me and don't want to make the wrong decision.
Also I have a car that is on lease. The payments are high but I cannot get out of the lease. Can I add this as an essential payement? And what on earth do I do when it runs out in 2 years cause presumably I will not get another lease!
I am deeply ashamed of my debt, feel alone and scared about the future. Trying to deal with my husbands mental health, even when he is not in the house, hold down a full time job and look after three children and all this debt is draining me.
Any advice or help would be gratefully received. Thanks

Hi and welcome :wave:

If you are going to start a DMP then stop paying your creditors immediately. If you have any debts with the bank your have your salary paid into then you will need to open a new bank account - with a bank that has no links to any of your debts. Do this asap and arrange for your salary to be paid into the new account asap as well.

Contact your creditors and tell them you are seeking support with your financial situation. This will immediately implement a 30 day no contact, no interest period.

Start the process with Stepchange and make sure you allow yourself enough in each expenditure heading to live comfortably - if you set your budget too tight you will struggle on your DMP and are more likely to fail.

I think you can prioritise your lease payments - Stepchange will advise. If you have 2 years until the lease runs out then build in £100 a month into your budget (add bits here and there if necessary). Make sure you save that month without fail. That will give you £2,400 in 2 years to buy a car. Plenty of money for a reasonable family car.

Once you are settled into the DMP - which only takes a couple of months during the set up period - you will find the financial worries will disappear and life will begin to improve.

kram

I totally agree 1st step is the hardest, but once you have made the call to any of the debt charities they will do their utmost to help you.
The relief you get from having their guidance and support is great.
I have just had my 1st payment taken by SC this month.
All I can say is everything was straight forward and easy.
K

Amandadwi

Thanks January2015. I am sat here trying to get up the courage to cancel direct debits. Fortunately I don't owe my bank any money so that's one less concern.
I do however owe money to the catalogue 'very' who I have heard are very difficult to deal with. I have a BNPl deal on my washing machine. Is it wrong for me to pay this off with with my credit card before defaulting on it? I have just read a lot of people struggling with them and then very banging on interest at the end of bnpl.

heavenlyharry01

Amanda - my husband and I have two accounts with Very....they are now wacking on the BNPIL interest. £70 this month, £60 next....which is a lot considering we are paying them £1 per month. I wish I paid off these on our credit cards, before entering our DMP.
Don't let it scare you though.
We've asked them to remove the interest, which they said no to. But I will write again and ask in the future.

January2015

Amandadwi wrote: »

Thanks January2015. I am sat here trying to get up the courage to cancel direct debits. Fortunately I don't owe my bank any money so that's one less concern.
I do however owe money to the catalogue 'very' who I have heard are very difficult to deal with. I have a BNPl deal on my washing machine. Is it wrong for me to pay this off with with my credit card before defaulting on it? I have just read a lot of people struggling with them and then very banging on interest at the end of bnpl.

Pay off the Very account with your credit card.

In the month before I entered my DMP I withdrew cash from all my credit cards to build up my emergency fund. Yes it increased our debt total but it gave my emergency savings fund a boost. I'm not recommending that others do that - but you are going to default your credit cards anyway regardless of whether the balance is at the limit or not - so paying of Very just moves the debt balance from one creditor to another ..... and credit card creditors are easy to deal with than Very.

Pay Very first.....then cancel direct debits

Be very sure you have absolutely no debts linked to your existing bank account, e.g. Barclays and Barclaycard are linked. As are Halifax and Lloyds. Just worth checking.

motivated

Hi Amanda
I was a little cheeky with my CC before entering my DMP. I made a money transfer into my new basic bank account and this is now my emergency fund.

I too was panicking only January of this year never missed a payment had a very good credit rating, worried about taking the first step into DMP land and was stressing myself out over it all thinking all the very worse scenarios.

Over £82,000 in debt, one call to SC and here I am, actually wishing I made that call I dreaded so much a lot sooner than I did. The stress and anxieties just lifted and I could see clearly for the first time in years.
As January2015 said the CC companies have been brilliant with us to be honest. They all accepted our situation and payment plans and been very accommodating.

You will be fine and good luck on your new journey
M

Amandadwi

Thanku for everyone's advice. That was my feelings with all the posts I had read about very.
January2015: I have debts with Tesco personal finance, Barclay card, mbna, Halifax, creations and very. My bank account is with the cooperative so I think I am okay unless anyone knows any different.
It is so good to hear from everyone. Making me feel more confident already. Going to go onto the step change site in a minute and redo my finances. I did do them a few weeks okay but with all the advice and reading I have done I am concerned that I have been very strict with my budget and could struggle.
Is there a template for a letter I can send this month with token payements saved somewhere? And I have noticed people tend to send postal orders. Is this because they don't have a cheque book or for some security reasons??
Thanks again for all of your responses x

January2015

Amandadwi wrote: »

Thanku for everyone's advice. That was my feelings with all the posts I had read about very.
January2015: I have debts with Tesco personal finance, Barclay card, mbna, Halifax, creations and very. My bank account is with the cooperative so I think I am okay unless anyone knows any different.
It is so good to hear from everyone. Making me feel more confident already. Going to go onto the step change site in a minute and redo my finances. I did do them a few weeks okay but with all the advice and reading I have done I am concerned that I have been very strict with my budget and could struggle.
Is there a template for a letter I can send this month with token payements saved somewhere? And I have noticed people tend to send postal orders. Is this because they don't have a cheque book or for some security reasons??
Thanks again for all of your responses x

Sending cheques is fine. Most people have to stop using the current accounts when entering a DMP - you will be fine staying with Co-op as your creditors are not linked to them.

Template letter from National Debtline here