MMD: Should Donald send Huey, Duey, or Lewy to private school?

seasider007

Both my kids went to the local primary school, my eldest a very intelligent girl, never really fitted in, bullying, excluded by her peers etc. The youngest sailed thru' , lots of friends & very popular.

When it came to secondary school, they both went to a very good school outside our catchment area, with virtually none of their peers from primary school.
The result of this was my eldest all of a sudden had lots of new friends and looked like she had been there all her life, and yet when my youngest started there within 3 months he was a "school refuser" and literally for the next 4 months barely went to school. Whether it was bullying or he just could'nt settle we have never found out. He eventually went back full time, but was never truly happy.

The result of this is that the final 2 years of his secondary education will have been spent in private education at a cost of £10000 a year, and is now a straight A pupil and he will go to 6th form there.
My eldest was offered the chance to go to 6th form at this private school but declined in order to stay with her friends and is also a straight A pupil, and has very high hopes of going to Oxford University, having been invited there twice in the past as a potential high achiever.

I suppose the moral of this is that you never really know how a child is going to settle at a school and that sometimes you have to bite the bullet & put your money where your mouth for you child's happiness.

Elainer

I agree with some others who have said local comp, then extra tutoring or sports clubs etc.
Both my children go to state schools, and my daughter was placed on the register as on over achiever at infant school at age 4. There are some very good state schools and lots of very good, committed teachers out there. My son isn't as academic as my daughter, and has been placed in lower sets for literacy and numeracy, but I'm just as proud and I wouldn't want him any other way, because its all part of his personality.

MoneySavingMummy_5

I don't think you could send one and not the others as this would just cause resntment. I send my daughter to an independant school and it was the best decision I ever made (apart from marrying her father I guess) but she is an only child and so I can afford to do it.
When I was young I passed the 11plus and went to a Girls Grammer but my brother went to the local comp. He was doing so badly that my Dad was forced (by Grandma) to offer to fund him going to a fantastic independant but he refused to go. I thought it extremely unfair at the time that he was given such a great opportunity for being so bad. If he had taken up the offer I would have seriously resented it (even though my school was a pretty good one).

Aldahbra

"Schools have your children for a lot less than half the time."

When children are only awake for 12 hours a day, Whats the good of having them for more than half the time if there asleep!!!! Before school, you spend all the time just getting them there. After school they are to tired to do much with. Then they're asleep. After school has worn them out all week, you get them at the weekend.

School has them when they are at their best, you get them when they are tired and hungry.

Parents inflance is important, but peer group pressure starts at 4 with full time school. They believe anything they've heard at school more than things discussed at home.

grecophile

Move-or help your local school become a better place by becoming involved.It's unfair to just send one child and it will cause problems in later life between siblings( ducklings?) My husband's bad experiences of private schools led him to teach in state schools.
Don't forget that not going to the local school restricts friendships.......
Who knows- all three make take to the local school like ducks to water!

inkie

We were in this situation - my DD1 got one of the top marks in the competative entrance exam for a top girls school - we were hoping that she would get 100% award, but was only offered 50% fee reduction - this meant that we had £6k to find to make up the shortfall - we could at a push have done it - but there was no way that we could have done this for DD2 as well, and so DD1 has gone to our local ce/catholic school, and i am hoping that the gifted and talented scheme will stretch her. Those that make the assumptions that it's only rich people that go to private schools, forget the fact that a lot of private school are competative, and so, in those cases doesn't matter if you are loaded, if that child hasn't got the ability, they won't get in.