A Simpler Life...

jenberry

Hi everyone,

I've been so inspired by the diaries on this forum and thought I'd start my own. Admittedly, my journey started a few months back, but I thought a diary would help me tighten the purse strings further and hopefully help others along the way.

In a nutshell, I was a shopaholic. Every month, when I got paid my fairly average wage of £1,200, I would go straight on Amazon or ASOS, and splurge on things I didn't need. I was receiving parcels on a daily basis. I remember I was away for a few days and when I returned, my landlord came round with about 12 parcels for me. 'Is it Christmas?' She joked. No. It was June.

I was deep in the red with no savings to my name. I have moved area many times over the past few years, from Glasgow (where I'm from) to Swansea then Durham, Richmond and now finally Hull. Moving around so much meant that I would have to lug all my things with me, most of which I had never read/ used and so I realised recently what a burden having so much stuff was. I moved to a better job about two years ago and was steadily able to clear my credit card debt and eventually, able to save. In the past few months, I have given at least 8 bags of stuff to charity, sold many things on eBay and Amazon, and avoided making any new, unnecessary purchases. My money has gone on the essentials: rent, bills, travel, food...though even in these areas, further cutbacks can be made. I am proud of how far I've come though: from certified shopaholic to being quite frugal and definitely valuing money more. At Christmas, I bought presents only for my family instead of more or less everyone I'd ever encountered, and for the first January in a long time, didn't feel like I was living on beans on toast to compensate.

I am now self-employed, which comes with its own financial idiosyncrasies, and determined to save for a house deposit. My father has motor neurone disease, so it is my aim in the next few months to move back to Glasgow to be close to him and my mum. I would like to buy a flat, though am definitely not opposed to renting in the interim. The main thing I want to achieve is a bit more financial freedom, and a more peaceful and happy life generally: a happiness that isn't attached to 'stuff'. I used to go into town because I was bored, and just like that, spend £100. Now I think twice about every purchase I make, and hopefully that will serve me well financially in the long term. I was anxious, depressed and always chasing after the next purchase or item to alleviate that, which it didn't do for long. I am living proof that more possessions does not equate to more peace or happiness: I believe the opposite is true.

So, here goes. My aim for the next week until I get paid, is to spend as little money as possible. I have £100 in my current account and would like to think there will be at least half that remaining this time next week (though I'm going out tonight so that may be a challenge). I like having a couple of no-spend days each week too, so I'll report back soon!

Good luck everyone on your own saving/ debt-free journeys xxx

angelpye

Hi jen, thought I would return the visit

Your story of moving around reminded me that I used to know someone who could put all of their personal possessions, literally everything that was not furniture in the back of their rather small car...at the time I thought they were strange and now I realise that they already knew what I now know. You don't have to own a lot to be happy and in fact I now believe the less I own the happier I am.

Good luck with saving and reaching your goal! Will pop in every now and then for a catch up

jenberry

Thanks so much Angel

It is my ultimate aim to move back to Glasgow being able to take all my possesions with me in only my little Fiesta, and without having to get a moving van costing hundreds of pounds! I think I'm pretty much on target if I were to make two journeys, but would love to cut it down to one...

I agree, the less I own, the more free I feel and the more I appreciate the non-thing things like my friends and family. I guess we all come into the world with nothing and leave with nothing, so it feels more natural and easy to have fewer possessions!

JoJoC

Hi Jenberry, just thought I'd stop by and say hi. I feel like I could learn a lot from your journey already so i'll subscribe and pop in to keep up with how you're getting on.

I live just outside Glasgow so not to far from where you want to return to - I can see why family would pull you back to your roots, especially when there's illness with loved ones.

When my brain is functioning better and I'm not feeling so chaotic, I want to spend time watching the documentaries that you and angelpye suggested and write a list of how to make inroads into becoming stuff-free. I do feel like it would help me a lot, although maybe not so easy with two young boys who accumulate stuff on a daily basis.

Good luck and i'll look forward to reading!

J

angelpye

Wow! I can't imagine that. I am guessing you don't have furniture to move?

angelpye

JoJo, with my DD I just try to make sure what we have here is relevant to her plus have a few things that I am keeping due to emotional attachment. So all clothes she grows out of, books, toys etc get sorted through every few months and what can go, does. I don't think I can impose my change on her retrospectively but it has meant I am definitely a lot more conscious about what I buy for her now and what I allow to come into the house from others.

It's a slow progress thing and once you do manage to start it can just find its own momentum. It will come because you have already started to think about it and if you are anything like me it will nag away in the background until you do it

jenberry

JoJo: Lovely! Where near Glasgow are you from? Every time I return home to visit my parents, I feel such a pull towards Glasgow, it's difficult to leave so I'm very much looking forward to returning. Not that I have experience of this, but I do think minimalism is more difficult with children, though not impossible. Check out Leo Babauta, he has 6 kids and writes a lot about minimalism and family.

Angel: You're right, I've always rented 'furnished' houses, so have no furniture other than a side table. I think taking a sofa in my car would be a bit more challenging!

vintagegal

Hi Jenberry, I'd love to follow your diary. I think I may be a shopaholic and wondered how you managed to beat it?
Well done on managing to turn your life around. I wonder if I am feeling suffocated by possessions too. I'm not happy with my weight and I think I hold onto things thinking 'one day I will get into this again'. For example I sorted out my swimming costumes. I am currently wearing a size 16 and had two of them. I also had 7 others in 14, 12 and 10....:eek:

ChasingSunshine

Hi Jenberry, I feel your pain about moving around so often. I am luckily in my current place for last few years and tbh the thought of having to pack it all up is enough to keep me from seriously thinking of moving again unless I have to before I eventually get my own place.
Well done on embracing minimalism and the plus side is not only do you have less stuff to cart around but you save money by not buying all the rubbish in the first place!!
Have subscribed and will follow your journey

JoJoC

jenberry wrote: »

JoJo: Lovely! Where near Glasgow are you from? Every time I return home to visit my parents, I feel such a pull towards Glasgow, it's difficult to leave so I'm very much looking forward to returning. Not that I have experience of this, but I do think minimalism is more difficult with children, though not impossible. Check out Leo Babauta, he has 6 kids and writes a lot about minimalism and family.

I'm from Hamilton so just about 7 miles south of Glasgow - I work in town so am there every day (except when working from home). I love it here, would never move away, but my reasons are predominantly family-oriented too.

I'll note Mr Babauta's name down too for a little research later. I think any form of progress towards minimalism at this point would be gratefully received by my poor, busy head. I do have the desire, just not the plan or understanding on how best to make it work for me so I think some reading/ listening will help clarify things for me.

Have you got any savings goals?

jenberry

Vintagegal: You sound just like me! When I moved out of my mum's house, I had 4 swimming costumes, all in different sizes, none of which had ever been worn. I was always buying things for the future, when I somehow manage to attain my ideal body. I have since thrown away everything that doesn't fit me NOW, because to hoard things for 'some day' when I fit into them is a complete lack of acceptance for my current body and weight. Answering how I kicked my shopping addiction is tricky but I think it was due to increasingly my knowledge of why I shop and also getting an insight into consumerism. I read a lot about minimalism and watched the Minimalism documentary on Netflix, which really put things into perspective and helped me to see how manipulative this capitalist world is and how we are so conditioned into believing that more and better stuff equals a better, more fulfilled person. Now when I see adverts, they seem so transparent: force-feeding us this idealistic lifestyle that comes with buying the newest innovation in skincare or that new mop. It's all nonsense. I buy non-branded, basic shampoo and conditioner for under £1, and it's just as good as the £7.99 rubbish I used to splash out on! I think shopping addiction and overeating often go hand in hand (they certainly did for me). It's very subconscious, but for me it was always chasing more, trying to get away from what I had in the present moment. When you strip back to basics and question every purchase, you see that we actually don't 'need' very much at all: food, warmth, rest, peace of mind. Everything else is just what we're told we need by people who have a profit to make!

ChasingSun: Thanks so much for your support, I'm so happy you've subscribed! Moving is apparently one of the most stressful things you can do in life. It's become second-nature to me, but I would like to think that lessening my load will mean it's more simple than it has been previously!

JoJo: I'm quite familiar with Hamilton, I had a good friend who lived there at university and even looked for a flat to rent in Hamilton at one point. It's great when you find somewhere you can't imagine moving away from. Hopefully that will be Glasgow for me, though I'm more of a country person these days! I so hope minimalism strikes a chord with you. I know exactly what it feels like to have a busy head, and while I am not quite free from it, I definitely feel free from stuff and all the thoughts that come along with financial hardship. I really hope I can help you achieve a more peaceful head!
My savings goals are a bit vague at the moment: Over the next 6 months or so, I want to save as much as possible, without feeling like I'm missing out on life. I would like to think I would have a 10% deposit on a flat by that stage (maybe around £10k), and possibly even more if I'm stringent! I live alone so that is a bit expensive, but have discovered a lot of activities that can be done for not very much money!