A Ditherer's Diary (again)

GeorgianaCavendish

Hey Naomi, sorry I've missed your updates for a while - I've not been very diligent with reading diaries over the past few weeks.

I don't have kids so this isn't first hand experience, but I honestly think that the more you can be open with them about managing money the better. I remember when I was a teenager, I was desperate to get my own bank account with a cheque book because my mum was always asking if shops took cheques and I thought that was the epitome of being grown up. Much later I realised that she preferred to pay by cheque to get those few days "breathing space" while the cheque was in the clearing system, so this wasn't the sophisticated grown up thing I thought it was!

Would you be open to sitting down with your kids when you are doing your monthly budget and explaining how you are allocating money to different bills or pots for groceries, travel, entertainment etc. Maybe get them to help you find bargains to save money from these pots, like finding special offer vouchers for cinema or discounts on some of the groceries?

My cousin does this lovely thing with her girls (they are 9 and 7) where she'll let them pick a recipe they'd like to make and then gives them money to spend in the supermarket to buy all the ingredients for their recipe. This was one of the big activities last time I visited them and it was so cute sitting with them to write "their" list and then go round and do "their" shopping in the supermarket, and make the recipe afterwards. The recipes are things like fajitas or fairy cakes (which involve a box kit so not too complicated) or fruit salad, so its not like they are doing complicated budgeting but I was impressed how good they were at putting back some of the exotic expensive fruit because it was "too much". Better than me to be honest!!

Naomim

GeorgianaCavendish wrote: »

Hey Naomi, sorry I've missed your updates for a while - I've not been very diligent with reading diaries over the past few weeks.

I don't have kids so this isn't first hand experience, but I honestly think that the more you can be open with them about managing money the better. I remember when I was a teenager, I was desperate to get my own bank account with a cheque book because my mum was always asking if shops took cheques and I thought that was the epitome of being grown up. Much later I realised that she preferred to pay by cheque to get those few days "breathing space" while the cheque was in the clearing system, so this wasn't the sophisticated grown up thing I thought it was!

Would you be open to sitting down with your kids when you are doing your monthly budget and explaining how you are allocating money to different bills or pots for groceries, travel, entertainment etc. Maybe get them to help you find bargains to save money from these pots, like finding special offer vouchers for cinema or discounts on some of the groceries?

My cousin does this lovely thing with her girls (they are 9 and 7) where she'll let them pick a recipe they'd like to make and then gives them money to spend in the supermarket to buy all the ingredients for their recipe. This was one of the big activities last time I visited them and it was so cute sitting with them to write "their" list and then go round and do "their" shopping in the supermarket, and make the recipe afterwards. The recipes are things like fajitas or fairy cakes (which involve a box kit so not too complicated) or fruit salad, so its not like they are doing complicated budgeting but I was impressed how good they were at putting back some of the exotic expensive fruit because it was "too much". Better than me to be honest!!

Thanks GC, that's a really good idea for shopping. The 7yo will love it for sure. Not so sure about the 12yo. It's also something we can do at home for a few hours. Bake a cake! I'm not a natural cook/baker. I dislike it to be honest but it keeps the kids quiet.

This week I've planned to take the kids swimming and go by bus. Again the 7yo loves it and travel is free for her and 12yo. I'm free as I have a monthly travelcard for work so that covers all my transport. And I'm taking 7yo to see The Emoji Movie. Again I have a coupon for two tickets for £12. We'll bring our own sweets and drinks. Fingers crossed this week shouldn't really cost more than £20 on our days out.

Three weeks of school holidays left :T

Naomi x

Naomim

In the process of jotting down my thoughts, I forgot about the kind of stuff I'm now doing daily.

I'm making MrM and I sandwiches every day. He brings a drink and crisps from home with him, I keep a multi-pack of crisps in my desk drawer and take advantage of the the free tea/coffee/water tower all day. Once a week when I do my big food shop I will add on a pasta pot for us, just to change it up a bit.

I also have a meal planner so I'm trying to stick to it and mix it up what we're eating. I have to have a secret stash of goodies hidden from the 12yo. If I empty a packed of biscuits into the tin he'd eat them all so I'm just putting a handful in at a time so everyone gets a look in!

We also have a big "change" pot at home that MrM and I both add to. This will be added up at Christmas and is usually around £100.

The budgeting spreadsheet is also being updated on an almost daily basis so I'm still feeling in control of what's coming out when. Except when MrM dips in :mad:

I need to update my card details on Quidco as my old card expired and I think I'm missing out of in-store purchases.

I also think I've found a way around needing a NOW TV subscription for Sky Atlantic. My in-laws have Sky and I can use their ID to get Sky Go on our laptop and watch any shows on Atlantic we usually watch. Currently Game of Thrones but also others.

So all in all, although the debt doesn't feel like it's moving, I feel a bit more in control and happier within myself.

Naomi

Naomim

I can't believe it's a week since I last posted. Time goes so fast!

Had a fairly good week last week. Took 7yo swimming as planned and we went by bus. Total spend was £7.80 I treated her to a McD's after. She has a happy meal and I have been saving coupons out of the metro so I got a chicken sandwich & fries for £1.99. A nice cheap day.

We also went to London with my in-laws for the day. We went to see St Pauls Cathedral and the Monument. I used my student discount so got up the monument for £3.30 . In-laws treated 7yo to a ice cream. The lady on the pitch was very taken with DD's hair (ginger and curly) and the fact she had a Chelsea FC top on so gave her an extra scoop for free :T We took packed lunch too and ate it at a lovely galleria opposite HMS Belfast near London Bridge. I spent £2 on a cup of tea. Total spend for the day £5.30 :j

In other news, I am still job hunting... albeit slowly. I'm being put forward for a job this week by an agency. On paper it sounds perfect so I'm crossing my fingers I'll get an interview. I've already looked on the salary calculator and if I got this it would mean an extra £500 a month.
So keep your fingers and toes crossed for me please!

Naomi

Kittychick

Good luck with the job xx

fiisch

Sorry to read about your cowboy building woes - that is appalling, he should be ashamed.

Just a a few pointers.. - do you really need the Virgin package with all the bells and whistles? I love my Sports channels, but if ever we're struggling, Sky Sports and Movies, Netflix and any other extras are the first things to get cut!!

Secondly, consider moving to SIM only deals for the mobiles. The relatively small monthly payments soon add up, although I guess there's pressure from your 11 year old to have the latest Apple whatdyamacallit. My daughter is six months, so I don't have that problem yet! :rotfl:

Lastly, although one to consider for the future when you've sorted out immediate debts - insurances should be paid annually where possible. Although relatively small bills, the APR's are extortionate - insurance companies are rubbing their hands at people paying monthly as it's free money to them (and I say this as someone working in the industry).

Good luck and keep going - plenty of credit control jobs in the insurance industry in London area!

Naomim

So, two years after I last posted and we are in a worse position than we ever were,

The kids are now 14 & 10. The 14 year old hasn't stopped growing and is now a towering 6 footer with size 12 feet. Trying to keep up with clothes and uniform has certainly been a challenge.

I did manage to change jobs in January 2018. It was a longer commute but better salary and benefits. However for some very stupid reason (nerves mainly), I started smoking again and have smoked for the past 18 months and kept us in debt. This week I have stopped again and this is day 6.

I stopped keeping the spreadsheets up to date, stopped bringing in lunch, started buying coffee's again. Everything that I worked so hard to do, I went backwards and stuck my head firmly in the sand.

More and more recently I have had sleepless nights worrying about the debt and how I'm going to afford to pay for essentials such as clothes for the kids. So here I am, cap in hand but determined I am going to do this.

I have already downloaded and completed Martins budget planner and updated my spreadsheet. So come and join me for the next part of my journey.

Naomi

Naomim wrote: »

I can't believe it's a week since I last posted. Time goes so fast!


In other news, I am still job hunting... albeit slowly. I'm being put forward for a job this week by an agency. On paper it sounds perfect so I'm crossing my fingers I'll get an interview. I've already looked on the salary calculator and if I got this it would mean an extra £500 a month.
So keep your fingers and toes crossed for me please!

Naomi

EssexHebridean

Well done for returning and facing lightbulb moment number 2!

[Deleted User]

Welcome back Naomim xx

DrSpendLittle

Welcome back!