Overwhelmed

sanfrancisco

You know what... I think you are doing brilliantly.

You're raising 4 kids, caring for your terminally ill father, working in a satisfying career.

Have you ever defaulted on any of the debts?

If you havnt I would just carry on as you are. The loan will be cleared in not too long and then just move that money to the overdraft.

Give yourself a pat in the back.

I think whoever said above to prepare financially for when your dad dies (I know this is awful) is a good idea. If you want to buy your sibling out or sell and buy its good to be prepared.

Rubyblossom

Thank you all for your replies. I will get back at the weekend. I am exhausted on my work days, so just ready to flake out. Quick ones. I have made a boob on the energy. I need to check through it again. My ex husband barely sees his kids. I have repeatedly asked him for help my taking the kids more and it is like to talking to a brick wall. He has used every excuse in the book. My favourite 'He has a right to a life'. Dad has had a good week, so at least thats good.

Smodlet

Sorry if this sounds harsh but maybe, if that is his attitude, your children are better off without him, do you think? I doubt they would enjoy his company if he resents their very existence; he sounds a bit like my pathetic excuse for a father. I would have preferred never to have met him.

At least you have a decent father, I imagine, if you are so devoted to caring for him. I hope you can try to find the time and energy to remember the good times, occasionally and, fwiw, I think you're amazing. Please hang in there and keep the faith. You can do this.

S x

On_my_way

Yes, he has a right to a life and so you do!! Also, he is only paying £200 per month as maintenance which isn't that much really. How old are the children?

Jon_B_2

Sorry to hear your plight. What a ridiculous state of affairs that you are basically working for zero income once childcare and related expenses are taken into account.

It's morally wrong on so many levels, but I'd quit work - take the benefits and look after your Dad.

haycorns

Hi , sorry to hear you have so many challenges at teh moment , but hats off to you. A busy working Mum can do amazing things - you just need some more financial backup

Are you claiming Carers allowance? It looks like you would qualify as you can take childcare costs off your income, but seeks some advice. If your dad is over 65 he can claim attendance allowance. Both of these will make it easier for you to manage.