We'd like to remind Forumites to please avoid political debate on the Forum. This is to keep it a safe and useful space for MoneySaving discussions. Threads that are - or become - political in nature may be removed in line with the Forum’s rules. Thank you for your understanding.

How to stick to budget

Options
I'm a student (veterinary nurse) and when I started my course, I told my friend that Christmas will be small this year due to my very small income and we both agreed £10-15 but I've found out she has bought me a gift, my boyfriend a gift, a joint gift for us and a gift for my dog. she is married and ive never bought her husband a gift before apart from for their engagement and wedding and I'm in no position to start to now. I don't know what to do as I feel pressured to now match the number of gifts she has bought. but I really cant afford that. Any suggestions? I feel I should just stick to my budget but I know she wont appreciate it.

Comments

  • tizerbelle
    tizerbelle Posts: 1,845 Forumite
    Name Dropper Combo Breaker First Post First Anniversary
    Options
    You stick to your budget of £10-15. It's what was agreed between you, If she couldn't stick to it, that's her problem. If she won't appreciate you not buying the same number of gifts / spending over the pre-agreed budget then tough - once again that is her problem. And if she truly values friendship on the gifts she receives, is she really worthy of being your friend?
  • C_J
    C_J Posts: 3,064 Forumite
    Name Dropper First Anniversary First Post
    Options
    Some people - me included - get a lot of pleasure from giving gifts, with no desire for reciprocal presents. Maybe your friend is one of those.

    She has chosen to buy gifts for your boyfriend and dog, so that is her decision and you shouldn't feel obligated to buy something for her husband/cat/dog/budgie in return as that was never the agreement.

    How do you know she has bought these extra gifts? If it comes up in conversation make sure you let her know, in a light-hearted way, that your budget really doesn't stretch to any more than your original plan and you hope she won't mind that.

    Of course it's possible that she has only spent a total of £10-15 on all of you so she's stuck the the agreed budget. Does she like shopping in the pound shops?? :)
  • Pollycat
    Pollycat Posts: 34,813 Forumite
    Name Dropper First Anniversary First Post Savvy Shopper!
    Options
    Why do you say she wouldn't appreciate it if you stick to the agreed budget?
    What is the point of discussing and agreeing a budget if one person doesn't intend to stick to it and will get annoyed if the other person does?
    That sounds crazy!

    I would stick to your agreed budget and buy just for her.

    Don't stress over it.
  • CoffeeAndTV
    Options
    Yeah I agree- stick to your agreed budget :)

    If you feel guilty not getting her boyfriend anything why not buy them a joint present with the £10-£15? Something like Prosecco and chocs?
  • adom_thomas
    Options
    I believe, She has given you a surprise! So now it is your turn to give surprise! If there is a budget issue, then just think about the things which can make happy! For an example: Create an environment and sing her favourite song!
  • Pollycat
    Pollycat Posts: 34,813 Forumite
    Name Dropper First Anniversary First Post Savvy Shopper!
    Options
    I believe, She has given you a surprise! So now it is your turn to give surprise! If there is a budget issue, then just think about the things which can make happy! For an example: Create an environment and sing her favourite song!
    The OP's friend knows the OP's financial situation.
    So yes, she has given the OP a surprise but it's an unwelcome surprise.
    So - unless the OP's friend has managed to buy 4 gifts for between £10 and £15 which is the agreed budget, not one set arbitrarily by the OP - she has broken the agreement and made the OP feel so uncomfortable that she felt it necessary to post on a public forum.
    I really can't see why the OP should rack her brains to do something to make her friend 'happy' when spending between £10 and £15 should have the same effect.
This discussion has been closed.
Meet your Ambassadors

Categories

  • All Categories
  • 344.3K Banking & Borrowing
  • 250.5K Reduce Debt & Boost Income
  • 450.2K Spending & Discounts
  • 236.4K Work, Benefits & Business
  • 609.9K Mortgages, Homes & Bills
  • 173.6K Life & Family
  • 249.1K Travel & Transport
  • 1.5M Hobbies & Leisure
  • 15.9K Discuss & Feedback
  • 15.1K Coronavirus Support Boards