How to deal with a colleague I've worked with before?

Lone_Shark

Good afternoon,

Last Wednesday, I started in a new job. The job is with a very reputable company, and I have passed two rigorous interviews, along with an enhanced DBS check and provided two satisfactory previous employer references.

However, last week I discovered someone who I have worked with in the past is working there. This person was my supervisor at a conference centre we worked at when I was 18, and lets just say we did not end on a good note. Although my official reason for leaving the conference centre was done by an accepted letter of resignation. I, in ways. Resigned before I could be dismissed because of a heated argument involving the supervisor and another member of staff.

The argument was quite fierce, and I came down hard on that supervisor with quite a bad verbal put down. I well and truly put him in his place. I am now worrying that he could cause trouble for me within my new job. I don't believe he can say anything to my new employer, because on both sides there is a counter argument and as my official reason for leaving was resignation. This person could end up being sued for defamation of character if they aren't careful about what they say.

I don't want a situation to develop that far, but I have to protect my interests. If anyone knows where I stand in this situation, and what an ex colleague can or can't say my new employer. I would be grateful to know.

Thank you.

Undervalued

Lone_Shark wrote: »

Good afternoon,

Last Wednesday, I started in a new job. The job is with a very reputable company, and I have passed two rigorous interviews, along with an enhanced DBS check and provided two satisfactory previous employer references.

However, last week I discovered someone who I have worked with in the past is working there. This person was my supervisor at a conference centre we worked at when I was 18, and lets just say we did not end on a good note. Although my official reason for leaving the conference centre was done by an accepted letter of resignation. I, in ways. Resigned before I could be dismissed because of a heated argument involving the supervisor and another member of staff.

The argument was quite fierce, and I came down hard on that supervisor with quite a bad verbal put down. I well and truly put him in his place. I am now worrying that he could cause trouble for me within my new job. I don't believe he can say anything to my new employer, because on both sides there is a counter argument and as my official reason for leaving was resignation. This person could end up being sued for defamation of character if they aren't careful about what they say.

I don't want a situation to develop that far, but I have to protect my interests. If anyone knows where I stand in this situation, and what an ex colleague can or can't say my new employer. I would be grateful to know.

Thank you.

By whom?

Have you any ideas of the costs and risks of bringing such an action?

Basically he can say anything he likes as long as it is true, you cannot defame somebody with the truth however damaging or unpleasant it may be.

Beyond that then it comes down to the practical problem of finding out exactly what he has said (how are you going to do that unless the employer chooses to tell you?) and what, if anything, you can realistically do about it.

Given that you have just started the new job keep in mind you can be dismissed for no reason at all during the first two years.

lincroft1710

Do you know how much it costs to bring a case to court for defamation of character?

He can say what he wants to your new employer, if it is the truth, nothing you can do about it.

You will just have to avoid any confrontation, with only a few days employment you can be dismissed without reason.

theoretica

How long ago was this?

This person can tell the truth, for instance as you have here. I would suggest clearing the air before it gets to that - as you came down on him with a hard verbal put down -'I think I owe you an appology from when I was young and foolish/less professional.'

Undervalued

theoretica wrote: »

This person can tell the truth, for instance as you have here. I would suggest clearing the air before it gets to that - as you came down on him with a hard verbal put down -'I think I owe you an appology from when I was young and foolish/less professional.'

Indeed. They could perfectly well say to the new employer "I think you should be aware that Loan Shark behaved so badly towards me in a previous job that s/he had to resign so as not to be dismissed". By your own account that would be perfectly true.

So the worst case is....

If your former supervisor is now an established and valued member of staff at the new company and makes it clear that he would find it hard to work with you, they may feel the easiest solution is to simply terminate your employment. With less than a month's service they don't even have to give you any notice unless there is a contractual requirement to do so. The company does not have to give you any reason at all.

Alternatively he may be perfectly happy to accept your apology and move on.

What you are certainly in no position to do is re-debate the rights and wrongs of what happened before.

sangie595

It sounds like you are still young, and holding on to it. You don't seem at all sorry for what you said and did, so assume that this incident is still on his mind as it is on yours. However, as others have said, if it is, then he can tell people what happened, and it's up to the employer what they do about it ,- you have no employment rights so you can be dismissed in a second if they wish. And again, as others have said, you won't be suing anyone for defamation because it is likely that everything he will say is true, and anyway, it costs £10k just to put a deposit on the court hearing before all other costs!

Really, it's best if you grow up and stop wondering around issuing ridiculous threats, even if only on an anonymous board! If you have obtained a job with a reputable company, and done so after rigorous testing and with good references, you should know how to act as a professional. So do so and show the employer that they made the right choice, even if he says something.

elsien

When you say you well and truly put him in his place, that makes it sound as if you still think your way of dealing with the situation at the time was correct. Given that you resigned rather than be dismissed, clearly this wasn't the case.
You need to be careful that any dealings you now have with him are professional from your side and that your manner towards him doesn't reflect the previous situation in any way.

ohreally

Lone_Shark wrote: »

This person could end up being sued for defamation of character if they aren't careful about what they say.

Hows that going to work out?

TELLIT01

Sounds like you did 'well and truly put him in his place' He kept his job and you had to resign or be sacked. Great result!

PixelPound

You are assuming he remembers the incident. To you its an emotional memory in which you lost your job, to him it might just be a time he had an argument with a subordinate who then left the company, and probably forgotten all about it.

Personally, I wouldn't mention anything, raising it could risk your current job - even if you did so with an apology, it's tainting the new relationship in that he may then remember you and whilst accepting your apology will intrinsically link you with the previous incident. It also could show that you haven't grown up from those days which may make him raise concerns you may be unsuitable. If he does mention it, then clearly it was a memorable incident and offering an apology then could well put everything to rest (eating humble pie for the sake of your new job)

Lone_Shark

Thanks for your replies.

This happened over 10 years ago. We were in quite a difficult situation and what caused the argument was him being arrogant and lying saying something I claimed was happening wasn't true, when it was true. Through a moment of stress from working in a pressurised environment, I fed him a few home truths.

He took me to the office with the senior manager who tried to calm the situation and it was there where I really laid into him. It was humiliating for him and to be honest, he looked like he was going to cry. I do not think he will forget me after that.

In my letter of resignation, I did apologise for what I said to him. There was remorse from my side the next day. I wasn't too bothered about losing the job because I had another job to go to. What is worrying me now would be retribution from him. I'm not a teenager anymore, and I have progressed well within my career.

We won't be working together either. There is over 100 members of staff so it looks like I will have to lie low for a little while in the hope he doesn't say anything and in that time build a good relationship with my colleagues to show my employer that I am not the same person that had the argument with him.