Funeral - organising the Wake

Lleucu

Advice needed. I am organising a wake for a friend who died suddenly last week. Complicated back story, basically was at odds with family and neighbours, things looked up lately, new friends, I am one, we are paying for the wake.

Secular funeral, do not know how many are coming to the Wake, have booked community hall and caterers. The question I have is how to make the room more personalised and friendly. I was thinking of garden flowers and posies, photos of the person,perhaps if I can persuade the family a potted bio. Music? Faery lights? Candles?

I also do not know whether to get some friends there as 'professional mourners' to make up the numbers.

Anybody with any experience please comment.

crafty_witch

Dont know if it's possible in your case, but I went to a funeral recently where the at the wake the family had set up a digital photo frame with a slide show of pictures of the deceased throughout their life. It was not only a nice 'centerpiece' but got us all talking about our memories of her.
Made it feel very personal

Sorry for your loss xxx

Lleucu

Good idea will ask the family

gwynlas

Difficult one, personally would think community hall and caterers over the top unless deceased very popular and wake likely to be large. You would need to provide caterers with numbers and if few turn up there is likely to be a lot of wastage. Unless strongly against alcohol would suggest pub and a few trays of sandwiches with more available should they be needed.
If going ahead with community hall need to break up space if possible so if numbers small you don't look lost. Notice board could be personalised with biography and photos but otherwise there are no guidelines for decorating rooms for wakes

Lleucu

Community Hall, it is actually the bar at the back, local caterers are doing it for £6 a head seems a bargain to me. Break it up - good idea lots of places for chats. Have no idea of numbers minimum 15, maybe 30.

FairyPrincessk

I've seen 'albums' made with photos and little stories typed up and slid into page protectors put out on tables. Friends can also contribute if the family prefers not to. They give people something to look through and can start conversations if people don't know each other.

Marmaduke123

I've seen loose photos for people to look through and choose their favourite, then they stick it in an album and write a few words about their memories of the deceased.

Nice for the family to have, but maybe not so good if they are estranged.

Faith177

For my mums wake I did a massive poster board in her favourite colour with all pictures of her on and little stickers of things she loved so a plane, camera ect and then I had a little memorial book for people to write things in be it words of comfort or memories of my mum I just had it on a little table and that was it

pollypenny

Lleucu, you're Welsh obviously. Are you still in Wales?

We Welsh tend to go to funerals out of respect, so I'd allow for larger numbers, unless your friend had no contacts, no family or colleagues etc.

Lleucu

Dwi'n nol, yma o hyd.

You are right about funerals yng Nghymru, the trouble with this situation is that contact was actively avoided so I do not know how many people actually knew her. We will see hopefully enough food.