Because my parents are homeowners, will they get care?

Smoothwise

I am desperate for help, so if you know anything that might help us move forwards, please reply to this thread...

8 years ago in 2008, I was living at home after graduating. My elderly parents were renting, but the landlord decided to sell and they needed to move. We decided to get a joint mortgage between me and both my parents (95%, 40 years, fixed at 6.5% until 2018) and bought a house. I long ago moved out, but have continued to send my share of the mortgage home ever since.

I have since bought a house with my girlfriend, and while we never argue over the money I send to my parents, since I was made jobless due to ill health, I feel awful that my girlfriend is working to pay our and my parents mortgage.

My parent's have no savings, and they couldn't afford the mortgage without my help. They had hoped to live there the rest of their lives, and then of course the house would eventually be mine.

However... my mother now has ever advancing dementia. She is eventually going to need full time care. At present she receives no care, but if anything happened to my father, she would need to move IMMEDIATELY. If anything happened to my mother, my father would not be able to afford the house on his pension on his own.

I spoke to my council (50 miles away from parents) about getting my parents in an apartment with an onsite warden. He said they only assess people currently in council provided accommodation. Obviously my parents will never get council provided accommodation while they are homeowners.

What do I do?

I can't afford to buy them out their share of the mortgage because I am now jobless. My first thought was they need to sell, rent for a bit, and be assessed to get council provided accommodation. Is this risky? Is it likely?

Please no comments on how stupid we were taking the decisions so far. I was young and trying to help my parents, yes they've made some bad decisions.

candy8234

I don't know a lot about this, but I work in an IT dept in an Housing Association and I believe we offer flats in sheltered housing to people who were home-owners but need some support. We have some accommodation of this sort that is immediately available for reasons such as not being near shops or not having a lift, which some people could manage. I don't know all the rules but how about approaching housing associations in their area? Also are Social Services involved they may (not sure how good this would be though because of cuts) be able to offer advice as your mother has dementia.

loveka

I think you need to phone Age Concern for advice.

What I do know is that your father would not be forced to sell the house to fund your mother's care.

Good luck.

AnotherJoe

Terrible situation not aided by horrendous mortgage rate and lock in with no doubt huge early repayment charge which makes some ideas ruinous. I think your first thought about selling and renting on the face if it seems plausible but has many issues in addition to cost. For example if father can't afford to pay mortgage by himself, how would he rent? Might council regard him as making him intentionally homeless ?

I think you have to focus on getting your mother in care first, that will simplify the situation. Then father can sell once the ERC period has elapsed and downsize into renting a smaller place. Is your father able to care for her? This is a very wearing disease on careers. Do you have any feeling for how long your father can cope? Will it go past the ERC, eg two years away ? What happens now?

Do you have a power of attorney for mother ? If not, even selling up may be a problem.

You should also contact the alzheimers Society they will have encountered these kind of situations before and know the ins and outs of dealing with social services.

tlc678910

Hi OP,
For what it's worth I don't think you have made any "stupid" decisions so far. Only kind decisions which unfortunately have been made more difficult by several turns of circumstance outside of your control.

Have you been in touch with the social services department in your parents local authority. Ask for a needs assessment for your mum as a person in need of care and support. Your father may be entitled to help with your mum and even respite care to give him a break.

I'm not saying care would be free but they do financial assessments and obviously your parents can't pay what they can't afford. If charges build to be recouped if your house is sold I would assume it would only be from your mums share of the equity in the house but you can ask them how this works. If your mum gets a social worker he/she can help you and your parents consider their housing needs particularly as your mums illness progresses - it can't hurt to ask.

Wishing you and your parents all the best
T

Edit: I have no idea if this would get you anywhere but again it can't hurt. If you and your parents feel you might need to sell up why not write to enquire if under these extenuating circumstances the mortgage company might wave the early repayment charge i.e. that your parents intended to remain in the property for life but your mum has been diagnosed with Dementia and it no longer meets her housing needs. Enclose proof of your mums dementia. You may be wasting your time but it will only cost you the price of a stamp to find out.

Editing again! I'm wondering if drawing attention to your mums condition might make the sale process more tricky so if you can wait out the early repayment charge you might not need to do this.