Paying 16 year old directly?

Hi all,

My OH pays maintenance every month without fail, at the set amount via a private agreement, the CSA have never been involved, however we have huge concerns that none of this is being used on the children. We buy them clothing and pay for school trips etc on top of maintenance and happily do so. Currently the money is being used as a method of attack with the ex telling the elder child (16) that nothing is being paid. Are we allowed to pay his share directly to his account, with him being 16, or could the ex then take things further and claim he's stopped paying as a result? Should add he is very responsible financially (as far as 16 year olds go). We would continue to pay the younger child's share to the ex.

Thanks in advance,
Lil'H
Riding out the receession.........

Comments

  • tattycath
    tattycath Posts: 7,175 Forumite
    First Anniversary First Post
    lil'H wrote: »
    Hi all,

    My OH pays maintenance every month without fail, at the set amount via a private agreement, the CSA have never been involved, however we have huge concerns that none of this is being used on the children. We buy them clothing and pay for school trips etc on top of maintenance and happily do so. Currently the money is being used as a method of attack with the ex telling the elder child (16) that nothing is being paid. Are we allowed to pay his share directly to his account, with him being 16, or could the ex then take things further and claim he's stopped paying as a result? Should add he is very responsible financially (as far as 16 year olds go). We would continue to pay the younger child's share to the ex.

    Thanks in advance,
    Lil'H
    I think the ex could claim that you aren't paying maintenance if you pay it direct to the child.
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  • mum2one
    mum2one Posts: 16,279 Forumite
    Xmas Saver!
    while its a nice thought, in reality its a no go area, as the ex could say its pocket money/xmas/bday/school trip etc etc...

    x
    xx rip dad... we had our ups and downs but we’re always be family xx
  • duchy
    duchy Posts: 19,511 Forumite
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    edited 18 March 2016 at 2:25AM
    So the money you'd be paying to a sixteen year old you'd expect them to pay to their Mother for food and board .........or simply spend of "stuff" so you'd be effectively giving them a couple of hundred of pounds pocket money and leave the mother short of the money meant to help house and feed the child ?

    Sounds like game playing is going on from both sides.

    If you want to give a child spending money over and above the child support you are legally obligated to pay the parent he lives with you of course can - but that doesn't release you from the legal obligation to pay child support to the parent with care of the child .
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  • DUTR
    DUTR Posts: 12,958 Forumite
    First Anniversary Name Dropper First Post
    lil'H wrote: »
    Hi all,

    My OH pays maintenance every month without fail, at the set amount via a private agreement, the CSA have never been involved, however we have huge concerns that none of this is being used on the children. We buy them clothing and pay for school trips etc on top of maintenance and happily do so. Currently the money is being used as a method of attack with the ex telling the elder child (16) that nothing is being paid. Are we allowed to pay his share directly to his account, with him being 16, or could the ex then take things further and claim he's stopped paying as a result? Should add he is very responsible financially (as far as 16 year olds go). We would continue to pay the younger child's share to the ex.

    Thanks in advance,
    Lil'H

    If you are happy to do so then continue to do so, there will come a day when liability ceases.
  • shoe*diva79
    shoe*diva79 Posts: 1,356 Forumite
    No, you cant. I assume the child is fed, has a roof over their head, hot water to wash with, a warm home... I could go on forever with how much kids cost. You could just pay the legal minimum and then extra to the child directly if you so wish.

    All the time that child benefit is in place, CM is payable to the PWC.
  • System
    System Posts: 178,093 Community Admin
    Photogenic Name Dropper First Post
    the ex telling the elder child (16) that nothing is being paid
    The next time that your OH sees his son he should show him the bank statements showing the payments to his mother.

    The son can then tackle his lying mother directly having seen the evidence.
  • missmontana
    missmontana Posts: 1,994 Forumite
    First Post First Anniversary Combo Breaker
    No, you cant. I assume the child is fed, has a roof over their head, hot water to wash with, a warm home... I could go on forever with how much kids cost. You could just pay the legal minimum and then extra to the child directly if you so wish.

    All the time that child benefit is in place, CM is payable to the PWC.


    What I was going to say, PWC has rent and bills to pay, shopping to buy.
    You can show him that you pay her the money.
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