Poor work history/mental health - what should I do?

BigAunty

SpicyChickenBaguette wrote: »

How do people stay motivated when they are in situations like this? It's easy for people to say "just take any job" when they are working in their dream career and are financially stable, but for someone like me who wants a career he can be proud of/passionate about, it's very frustrating to deal with and comprehend.

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Its very frustrating to stay motivated in the face of constant obstructions and rejections. I can't really say how you can continue to inspire yourself, other than to keep on keeping on and try to draw lessons from it and change your approach based on feedback.

I expect motivation can only truly come from within but do you have any close friends or family who can buddy with you and help you with applications and allow you to get things off your chest?

SpicyChickenBaguette wrote: »

I am more than certain that you are giving me good advice (e.g. don't expect anything to just land on your plate, you aren't very employable, just try and get any job etc) and I'm sure it's the right advice, but it's just hard for someone like me who doesn't just want to let life pass me by. I looked people's profiles on LinkedIn and they'll have worked for numerous big name firms in various roles and have a good CV/work history. I want to be proud to say what I've achieved and working as a barista in Starbucks or stacking shelves isn't in any way comparable.

You are having a late start but that's no reason to put unnecessary pressure on yourself and try to accelerate things beyond your capability or control. Patience and planning is a much better strategy than haste and waste.

And don't compare yourself with others, its corrosive and pointless. For every shiny CV you see on LinkdIn, there is a chap like yourself who never gathered the drive to get themselves together and just spiralled into long-term worklessness, mental health issues, homelessness and substance abuse that you won't get to see on LinkdIn. Only you look at the achievers and not what you prevented from happening.

SpicyChickenBaguette wrote: »

It's just hard to accept that I don't feel like I have much of a future, and no matter how much someone tries to sweeten the deal, the future looks bleak as hell. Everyone else seems to have it so easy, on the surface at least.

Again, comparisons are pointless and unproductive. You do have a future but just be patient about where you are going. You've had quite negative feedback and some criticism on this forum but hopefully can use this in a positive way without taking it so personally. It feels personal to you but if anyone posted the kind of dilemma you did, they'd pretty much receive the same range of advice, good and bad.

There are ways for you to restore and improve your confidence - try a different type of voluntary work, get a girlfriend, join community and friendship groups, counselling/hypnotherapy, undertake some free courses online, etc. Not all things that build esteem have to come from employment.

Folander

If you looked at my LinkedIn you would see me with big letters after my name and a couple of massive past and current employers. What you don't see is the working in a sign factory, working in a McDonalds or the bar work. You are comparing apples and pears.

You start a 'useless degree' now, in 5 years time you'll be empowered, would have made friends and contacts and your CV might pass the first round because you have a degree.
OR
You are still on this site in 5 years time moaning everyone has walked into their good jobs, are all millionaires and have the best families. Your CV is not even printed out.

Your sense of entitlement needs to stop. Your humble beginnings needs to start. Google how many famous people have worked in McDonalds etc.

ScorpiondeRooftrouser

Nobody is saying you can't get wherever you choose to go. We don't know.

What people are saying is that you can't choose where to start. Start wherever someone will let you start, and work from there.

Any time you spend now NOT doing an entry level job is wasted. Start next week doing anything you can get. You have to go through that to get to whatever future you have, and nobody can tell you it's going to be great. It might be and it might not be. That's life. But if you sit around waiting for the magic answer, you will have no future at all.

BigAunty

SpicyChickenBaguette wrote: »

I've been referred in the past but the level is more aimed at those with more severe MH issues and the work is at a really basic level. I had a social worker previously who agreed it wasn't really aimed at people like me. Most schemes are more at integrating people into a work environment - not what I need, I've worked in the past and feel ready for work.

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You haven't actually indicated how you are finding your job search - ie. how many jobs you apply for, what areas/type of employment, how long you have been unemployed since your last job, your success rate in being selected for interview, any feedback from employers about applications or interviews. How is this going? What is the lay of the land?

If its' not been very positive and you are struggling, perhaps you should consider contacting those employment charities again? Perhaps you could persuade them to find you a higher level role? Perhaps they could get you a lower level role in an area that you are interested in or where you can see there are opportunities to build a better CV and step up a level in a year or two?

missbiggles1

SpicyChickenBaguette wrote: »

How do people stay motivated when they are in situations like this? It's easy for people to say "just take any job" when they are working in their dream career and are financially stable, but for someone like me who wants a career he can be proud of/passionate about, it's very frustrating to deal with and comprehend.

I am more than certain that you are giving me good advice (e.g. don't expect anything to just land on your plate, you aren't very employable, just try and get any job etc) and I'm sure it's the right advice, but it's just hard for someone like me who doesn't just want to let life pass me by. I looked people's profiles on LinkedIn and they'll have worked for numerous big name firms in various roles and have a good CV/work history. I want to be proud to say what I've achieved and working as a barista in Starbucks or stacking shelves isn't in any way comparable.

It's just hard to accept that I don't feel like I have much of a future, and no matter how much someone tries to sweeten the deal, the future looks bleak as hell. Everyone else seems to have it so easy, on the surface at least.

Although some of us will be financially stable, I doubt that many (if any) of us are working in our dream career of have ever done so.

In addition, many people here, even with degrees, post grad qualifications and many years of experience will have had points in their working lives where they have done basic work in retail, cleaning, call centres, petrol stations and factories. (That list is the work I've done, others will be able to add more.)

The very worst thing you can do now is to follow a long period of mental ill health by a long period of unemployment as this will really blight your future. You need, amongst other things, to show that you can hold down a full time job without making yourself ill again - any full time (or even substantial part time job) will prove that. Sitting round wishing for a "dream career" and a high paid job will prove nothing to anybody.

BigAunty

Can anyone remember the name of the poster (think it may have begun with the Letter K or be related to Greek) who had a MH background and poor CV who used to pop up on this forum, groundhog style, with the same complaints about job seeking, then ignore all advice, then pop up again with the same questions?

It would be nice if the OP could read their threads. That way, they will understand that they actually do have drive and the ability to make and carry out plans, unlike the other person, who constantly prevaricated and had no insight, was quite apathetic and withdrawn (albiet due to anxiety).

I am optimistic for the OP because they have a real commitment to address their issues and perform actions, make decisions to get there.

I think if they read the other threads, they might be able to make a positive comparison for once, one more productive than looking at profiles on LinkedIn.

EDIT- I misremembered the name of the poster. It's Hedylogos and another poster has provided the link to their threads on page 6 of this thread. There is some correspondance in their posts in terms of background/expectations but many differences too in terms of confidence/ planning skills.

steelee_uk

I'm a stay at home mum, with 2 smallish kids and a "breadwinner" husband. We live in a nice neighbourhood, drive nice cars and own a lovely house.

We've both worked hard over the years, in entry level jobs, and we've struggled and sacrificed and scrimped and saved to get to this position. My husband is finally on a good wage and I have been able to give up work. We're 38 and, to the outside world it looks like the ideal situation. To you, it might look like it's been a breeze and is easily attainable. But it has taken 20yrs of work (about 10 of serious hard work).

I don't know anyone who has done what you want to do.

Stories I have heard of people who have turned their lives around financially, in a short space of time, appear to be really self motivated. Not everyone is like that. I'd guess, from this thread, that you are most likely not that type of person.

You have ruled out returning to the only job experiences you have had. Whilst I can understand that, it does seem like you're now waiting for someone here to give you an answer.

I'd say that the advice previously given on here is correct, you need to find your first steady job - maybe even just asking if there's any work experience options. That can be anywhere, but you might be better to look round local independent places first. The chances are that a job from that would mean the salary and promotion prospects won't be great, but you'll be earning something - financially and skill wise too.

2 yrs of steady employment is the closest thing to a magical qualification that I think you can easily get.

If/when you do get the entry level job then you'll have the luxury of looking for something better. Ideally you'll be self motivated enough to work extra hard (always try to exceed expectations) and impress those above you - earning a good reputation- which really is the magic qualification in most national organisations.

In this day and age, no-one (regardless of their background MH issues or not), is going to get very far if they feel they are too good for a job.

I'm personally experienced with a good friend who had qualified in a good profession, then suffered serious MH issues. They, eventually, returned to work. However, despite being "back to normal " for a few yrs before getting back to work, they have found it very difficult coping and have had a few set backs.

I hope you have a good support system in place as you might find that you'll also take a few steps back occasionally.

Good luck x

nimbo

I currently work for a drug and alcohol treatment agency. About half the people here have degrees and the others have a gaggle of different level qualifications.

Many are In Recovery themselves. would you consider working with people who are In Need of recovery co- ordinators? It works for some and not others in recovery. I act as a key worker half my time - deliver group sessions and do assessment and work on the needle exchange too. Obviously different organisations do things differently

You would need to be able to use a computer - they could teach you the rest. And have an understanding of cycles of addiction. I am paid just under 20k. The increments should take this up to about 23k but these have been frozen for about 8 years now. There are more senior roles in the organisation that I could aspire to if I wished. These would pay better.

The work is not glamorous - and although qualifications are handy - not essential.

Training - have you looked at places such as northern college. S. Yorkshire - they offer a range of courses short or other wise live in if you wish - taking up to nine months. Try a few and see why you like? Weekend courses are available in substance misuse fields as well as criminal justice type topics.

People hired by the place I work are often people who have previously volunteered with the service and then get internal applicant only jobs. - they know the computer system and the style of working etc.

You would need to know you would not be triggered seeing people in drink or drugs etc. It can be hard and if it would lead to lapses may be not for you. But it is an idea. So the volunteering may be a good start to see if you are able and like the type of role.

missbiggles1

BigAunty wrote: »

Can anyone remember the name of the poster (think it may have begun with the Letter K or be related to Greek) who had a MH background and poor CV who used to pop up on this forum, groundhog style, with the same complaints about job seeking, then ignore all advice, then pop up again with the same questions?

It would be nice if the OP could read their threads. That way, they will understand that they actually do have drive and the ability to make and carry out plans, unlike the other person, who constantly prevaricated and had no insight, was quite apathetic and withdrawn (albiet due to anxiety).

I am optimistic for the OP because they have a real commitment to address their issues and perform actions, make decisions to get there.

I think if they read the other threads, they might be able to make a positive comparison for once, one more productive than looking at profiles on LinkedIn.

I can't remember that specific poster but it seems to me that we've had several people posting similar enquiries on here recently.

dancingfairy

The main thing is to start somewhere and try and build up a solid work history.
If you want to work in law you could maybe start as a receptionist, find out what entry level qualifications there are then perhaps move on to a more admin based role. As you study more and gain more experience you can progress.
Pick an area ie law/ accountancy/ social type work/ a trade that you think you'd at least like although if it's an office job you can start as a receptionist somewhere a d it should give you the skills to move elsewhere.
Df