Fell off the wagon, now need to stop the insanity!

its_maths_not_magic

Years ago I had my lbm. I realised that the amount of debt we were in was scary and I needed to turn this situation around. So I did. I moved into more affordable accommodation and not only managed to pay off some of my debts but even had savings as well. For the first time in my life I was handling money in a way that made me feel proud of myself. And I was happy and secure in my financial life.


I don't know how but slowly, bit by bit I went back to my old habits. Which mostly are very black and white. For example, during the day and beginning of the week I tend to be very healthy, eat right, drink lots of water etc but as the week progresses I get cravings for junk food and alcohol so by the time pay day comes around I just blow anything extra I have on food/drink. Then Monday comes around and I go back to being healthy.


I don't know how to get off this rollercoaster. Even though I KNOW how much better I felt (in all aspects of my life) when I was handling my money responsibly. I'm fine up until Thursday and then just lose the ability to care about the future, all I can think about is cutting loose on the weekend and how good the relief will be. Even though I know that if I didn't spend every last penny I would be less stressed during the week and therefore not needing the relief from life alcohol/junk food bring.


Any thoughts, ideas or suggestions gratefully received.

andyfromotley

Hi,

this sounds like deeply ingrained behaviour, which has a hint of lmost self destruction about it. Its a trait that is found often in addicts, that they are able to stop and rebuild their life, then in the face of overwhelming evidence of the good that this has done to their life return to their past behaviour. Almost as if they feel that they dont deserve such a normal and healthy lifestyle.

Clearly you know all of this and seem pretty self aware. The only thing i could suggest is to perhaps try some counselling to try and get to the root cause of this?

Playing_with_Fire_2

Hey, have you considered that maybe you are trying so hard to be perfect that you run out of the energy to even be good? Have a look at Kelly McGonigal talking about the Willpower Instinct on Youtube ( I haven't seen this but her book - Maximum Willpower is great). There are a number of strategies that you can use to make it easier to do the right thing, for example focussing on improving the consistency of your healthy eating rather than being super good on Monday. Maybe you could decide in advance how much 'mad money' you can afford for the weekend and go out with only this in cash? Maybe put the money for savings straight into a savings account on payday.

Also think about how you can 'treat' yourself without undoing your good work - if you've eaten healthily up until Thursday reward yourself with a favourite TV programme rather than a cake. If you've spent your money according to your budget then celebrate by colouring in a square of your debt reduction sheet and updating your MSE signature rather than a shopping trip.

elleJay42

Hello,

I used to get like this sometimes, the thing that helped me was to budget in the takeaways and drinks but only what I could really afford to do. That way I could look forward to the pizza on Friday night but didn't have it again on Saturday AND Sunday night like I used to in the past.

It's like dieting, if you go on a super restrictive diet you give up by the weekend but if you're realistic with your expectations and realise that you're going to slip sometimes it's easier to stick to it.

nannytone_2

find something to occupy yourself from thursday on.
maybe take a course or visit family/friends?