Worse than we thought......

Lemonsqueezer78

foolofbeans wrote: »

Monthly income will increase by £500 in a couple of months and if I can get more work without paying out for childcare that could increase further. I can understand that the high amount of debt would point to a DMP but I'd much rather struggle through as I really think with cutbacks we could get the debt down quicker than a DMP would take. Of course I realise I may be being unrealistic

My only concern here is what is going to happen in the next "couple of months". Clearly, if your SOA is accurate, it can really only add up to you going further in to debt in the next few months.

Not to mention the obvious risks associated with "struggling through" on the basis that you hope for a future increase in earnings.

Lastly, if you really have completely missed off a further loan repayment of £160(!) then... well, you really are in quite deep, I'm afraid.

If you do manage to to survive the next couple of months,and your income increase does happen AND you make some significant changes to your SOA, then I can possibly see some opportunity emerging to start attacking these debts but I really do fear you may be beyond the point of really getting back on top of this.

I would still contact a debt advice/support service if I were you. You really have nothing to lose by doing so and they will only discuss what your options are. They certainly won't force you in to something you don't want to do.

northerner999

You have a.p number of debts, including the two highest, at expensive interest rates.

1 - prioritise any extra income you manage to free up on these, though of course right now that will feel miles away.

2 - look into transferring these onto lower interest rates, preferably 0% but you will probably get life of balance transfers at far lower rates. If you can only pay the minimum and are being charged this interest then they will never come down.

Well done on posting on here, you have taken the most difficult step. There's lots of good advice coming, but it all boils down to maximising income and limiting expenditure.

So, look at what you have in your food cupboards. Buy some tins that sit there for months or years? Use them in future meals. Do a proper stock take when you can and try and plan to live mostly off what you have in, this will at very least reduce some immediate food shopping costs for a week or two while you get a plan together. meal plan, so you only buy what you need - accept that for the next few months you are not necessarily eating the finest brands or getting takeaways.


. Is there anything you can flog on eBay - valuables that are not too sentimental? My mother recently sold a gold watch and ring for a grand combined on eBay, and she could have held out for a little more. Nothing stopping you doing that. CDs, DVDs etc - music magpie them, some places give money for bags of old clothes so round up anything your kids haven't worn for a year and flog them. Sign up a house account for online surveys and combine to fill them in - when I freelanced I earned a steady tenner a week doing this. That's £500+ a year. If your kids do that, perhaps let them have half the income of each survey they do to boost their pocket money?

How old are your two teens who work at home. Are they aware of the debt? Is there scope for them to work and help out a bit?

You spend £720 a year on presents. Stop, certainly between you and your husband. If your kids understand the situation they will be understanding of less expensive but more thoughtful gifts. I haven't spent kore than a few quid on gifts for years, I have a box where I buy nice things when cheap/reduced and store them. Just have to make sure the same gift doesn't go to someone two years in a row, but I am usually complimented on my gift choices.

Lemonsqueezer78

You have mentioned your partner a couple of times (magazines, smoking, entertainment budget being mostly all his...).

Has your partner seen your SOA and is he fully aware of your financial situation? It is a common theme on this board to see that one person in a relationship will have a "light bulb moment" about their financial situation whilst their partner has yet to properly catch on. Leaving the other person with the burden of trying to single handedly transform things.

Fact is, you definitely cannot sort this out without your partners buy in. Believe me, I know how hard it is to have to try and tell the one you love that they have to cut back on the things they like doing.... but, he has to be made aware of all this. Without wishing to panic you, you're situation really is quite urgent and you will need his support (and I'm afraid some sacrifices) to get back on track.

Believe me, it will lead to a great deal of resentment building over time if you cannot get him to support you on this and make some of the necessary changes that need to happen and you end up struggling to take this on alone. You will begin to make a direct link between your stress and sleepless nights - and his nights out at the pub and his nicotine addiction and that won't be good for your relationship either.

foolofbeans

Lemonsqueezer78 wrote: »

If you do manage to to survive the next couple of months,and your income increase does happen AND you make some significant changes to your SOA, then I can possibly see some opportunity emerging to start attacking these debts but I really do fear you may be beyond the point of really getting back on top of this.
I would still contact a debt advice/support service if I were you. You really have nothing to lose by doing so and they will only discuss what your options are. They certainly won't force you in to something you don't want to do.

My income increase for current workplace will be decided in four weeks time so we'll have a clearer picture then. I have refreshed my CV so I can look for other work. Partners income increase is dependent upon the weather so fingers crossed for an early spring!
I will contact Stepchange as I think talking through the benefits or otherwise of a DMP would be beneficial

foolofbeans

Lemonsqueezer78 wrote: »

You have mentioned your partner a couple of times (magazines, smoking, entertainment budget being mostly all his...).
Has your partner seen your SOA and is he fully aware of your financial situation?
Fact is, you definitely cannot sort this out without your partners buy in. Without wishing to panic you, you're situation really is quite urgent and you will need his support (and I'm afraid some sacrifices) to get back on track.

That's the rub isn't it? Partner has nearly always earned a fairly decent wage but has managed to also spend it. I'm trying to avoid the parent role as I want an equal financial input but partner is definitely struggling with the cutting back idea. Serious talks will take place tonight when the kids are all asleep.

concrete_kid

Hi

You can get this sorted but you will have to make sacrifices. I get the impression your partner is used to earning a good wage and feels he deserves nice things / treats.

However, I think you might have to get across to him that your disposable income is very low. Once your debts are taken off, you are earning as a househould the equivelent of £22k per year, so 11k each, and your lifestyle now needs to reflect that. So effectively you are both earning below minimum wage.

It's not nice to deprive yourself (I've been there), but once you both get on board and you see your debt decrease you will feel in control and be much happier.

Good luck!

getmore4less

Even with an extra £500pm you are not breaking even so there is much more commited than you can afford.

At a minimum you need to get under average earning as this is variable
Then aim for the min wage month being the normal spend.
Then aim to get under that

What would the average partner income a month be over a full 12months?


There are a lot of things that need to go, you don' have time to wait for the next pay packet with more money, you are allready spending it now.

I won't go through the list of things to go, people have covered enough to get you started. these are not things that will be ok in month or two they need to be cut out for a year or two.

getmore4less

One measure it to look at how much debt you were in 1 Jan 2015 then look at 1 jan 2016.

If it has gone up thats how much you are overpsending in a year.

anna_1977

Hello foolofbeans
I was wondering whether you managed to have a chat with your partner last night and how it went.
It's horrible facing up to this isn't it but the hard bit is done. I really would recommend you phone stepchange or national debt helpline for some advice.

prosaver

pack in smoking and get the gum, patches etc.

get a jar and put your ciggie money in it,
do this everyday and when u see all that cash u saved, you wont want too smoke again. happy daze