My best mate in debt and so down

Butterfliesarepretty

Hi,

Please can you help me help my best friend. Its not me who is in debt, I have claimed my charges back. My mate broke down to me on the phone yesterday saying she had been thinking of committing suicide (she is on anti-depressants). She earns around £900 net a month, has a £60,000 mortgage at £400 a month and owes £25,000 on top of that. She has the Citizens advice bureau helping her pay a minimal amount each month to each of her debts but she really is down. She has thought about bankruptcy but I am sure there is another way out. She will tell me but will not tell her dad about her situation. she carried this debt which was not hers from her marriage 9 years ago divorced. I have advised her to stick it on her mortgage over 30 years - she is 43. But what choices does she have? Please help me to help my best friend. I fear for her.

immoral_angeluk

IF she is already on anti depressants but still feeling suicidal she needs to go back and see her doctor ASAP. Forget the debt... her main priority is getting herself stable enough to be able to deal with everyday life let alone the debt.
Don't get her to put her debt on your mortgage.. all that's going to do secure all of her unsecured debt so if things get really bad she'd face losing her house which would NOT help her depression. Then suggest she called either the CCCS or Payplan for help and advice.

First and foremost she needs to go and see her doctor before it gets even worse.

Crown

Hi, Thank heavens that She has a friend like you. I myself wnet through bad depression last year when my debts snowballed in the wrong direction and although I hadnt considered suicide I understand how low debt can make you feel and at times it does seem like there is no way out.

PLEASE DO NOT LET HER CONSOLIDATE THE DEBT ONTO HER MORTGAGE!!

Depending on what type of debt is is you could be making a bad case worse. Is the debt unsecured credit cards? If so you would be turning htem in to secured debt what could make her homeless if she can not make the payment.

I am not sure what she has set up with the CAB as I didnt realise that they did debt management plans but I think it would be a good idea to contact the CCCS with the view of setting up a official DMP with them.

£25k may seem like a lot to here but I have double that amount of debt and have seen people with 6 times that amount on here and let me tell you that life is worth so much more just money. I currently pay around £1 a month to each of my creditors so there isa way out and although there not happy about it I know I am not getting any further into debt.

Is it possible you could get your friend to come online or with your help put together a statement of affairs as detailed in the first timers post by southern scouser?

Once we have further details we may be able to offer some more advice

Butterfliesarepretty

Hi she is at the doctors today and I have asked her to tell him everything she has said to me. What are the contact numbers for CCCS and DPM.
she will need to know what the letters stand for. Yes I understand not to put on her mortgage. she has thought about selling her house and paying off the debt if she has enough left and just renting a house rather than having a mortgage.

any more advice for her?

tealady

CCCS are the Consumer credit Counselling Svce, the number should be somewhere on this site (haven't looked myself, just wanted to get you a quick reply). A DMP is a debt management plan and its exactly what it says, CCCS will sort that. Your friend could also ask her local council if they have any debt advisors (they have them here in Brum) and like the CCCS they are free.

debt_doctor

Hi how much equity has your friend got in the property ?

I/E statement is essential for us to understand the full picture, please advise and we'll do what we can

Best wishes

tigerfeet2006

[FONT=arial,helvetica,sans-serif]Consumer Credit Counselling Service - Website: [/FONT][FONT=arial,helvetica,sans-serif]CCCS[/FONT][FONT=arial,helvetica,sans-serif] Telephone: 0800 138 1111[/FONT]
[FONT=arial,helvetica,sans-serif]National Debtline - Website: [FONT=arial,helvetica,sans-serif]National Debtline[/FONT][FONT=arial,helvetica,sans-serif] Telephone: 0808 808 4000
Citizens Advice Bureau - Website: [/FONT][/FONT][FONT=arial,helvetica,sans-serif]Citizens Advice or visit your local CAB centre (find nearest)[/FONT]

Butterfliesarepretty

Hi thanks for the numbers. Well I have no statements for my friend but she has a laptop and tonight I am going to ask her to go on this site. Her mortgage is £60,000 approx and I think the houses in her area are around £70-£85,000 at the moment. Its a two bed terraced.

Crown

Hi again,

Hope your friend and yourself are ok. Just wondering if you had a chance to speak to her about putting together a statement of affiars so you/she can see where you stand. With a few changes to spending/lifestyle habits she may be able save some cash to throw at the debt.

Hope to here from you soon

Dumb_Blonde_3

Yes please provide some more details so we can all look at them and help.

Its great that she has a friend like you to turn to.

Butterfliesarepretty

hi yes spoke to my friend last night. She has written down the thread web address so she can see what I have put down. She said she will come on the site and start putting forward her problems to get some answers. I have told her lots of people are in a worse situation than her own and that she will get more than enough help on here. Thanks everyone:beer: :T