Old Style Community?

Angel_Jenny

I am trying to be old style and frugal especially now as I have changed jobs. I like my job much more (I am now a support worker in a care home for adults with learning difficulties and other issues) but it is a minimum wage role which is a big drop from what I am used to.

It is almost a year since I moved towns to live with my boyfriend and there just doesn't seem to be a community feeling here. Maybe it is me! I chat to the elderly neighbours on one side and there is a single mum in her 40s on the other side and she is nice too. But I hardly see anyone else on the street.

I miss where I used to live as I knew half the street and we used to pop in and see each other or I used to help with gardening or doing little jobs. I just don't know how to go from casual chatting to anything more.

I read about the war years when neighbours banded together and shared skills and think it sounds so lovely and friendly. It feels a bit like everyone is in their own little bubble here. I used to be a WI member (I was the youngest member by decades and loved it!) but there isn't one near here and the nearest one (long journey of 2 buses) sounds really modern. Even the local library couldn't help and that is only open half the week.

As much as I love this forum it would be amazing to be able to learn all those skills from people who have the skills already. I keep looking for local groups but there seems to be nothing around here and between working shifts and not driving I am a bit limited for distance.

How do you get your dose of like minded old styleness?!

Thank you!

Gigervamp

I'm a member on the forums at Downsizer. It's about sustainable living and has a lot of smallholders as members. One of the things I like about Downsizer is that it's not just an online community. I've met a few members from there over the years. They also host community skill share weekends where you can learn all sorts, from foraging to spinning and weaving.

There's a site called Streetlife where you sign up, put in your postcode and can connect to others in your community. You could post on there and see if anyone in your area is interested in Old Style types of things. On my local one recently, people formed a walking group.

What about joining your local WI?

katkin

Could you start your own group Angel_Jenny? Or organise something for your street / local area. Allotments look like great places to meet like minded people and share skills / produce.

We have a communal garden and open space where we've enjoyed meeting neighbours and sharing activities, swapping things and helping each other out. I guess it all depends on the people around you but I've been surprised at how this approach has snowballed here.

thriftwizard

I've been having the same kind of conversation with my neighbour today! Since the last of the older inhabitants, her next-door neighbour, died last year & his house was sold to a fairly obnoxious developer, there's less and less sense of community here; our kids grew up here & used to play out in the street together but the kids who are growing up here now are rushed from door to car in the mornings and car to bed in the evenings. The parents don't talk & just look startled and rather worried if you offer a cheery hallo. We've been here over twenty years, but both of us are starting to feel that something precious & important has gone away from here now. Others our own age, who used to be friends at the school gate, are now working all the hours they can, sometimes at more than one job, to either help their kids pay down student debt or boost their pensions to a level they think they'll be able to afford to live on.

I'm also a member of a Guild that preserves & develops a particular set of textile-related skills, and although it's a big organisation, it's becoming harder & harder to find anyone who has the time to do any of the numerous little tasks that keep it running. The oldies have served their time, and many don't "do" computers, which are a necessity now, but the younger members are lucky to be able to attend a couple of meetings a year, never mind do anything official, as they're all working full-time as well as running households & ferrying kids around. No-one has any free time any more, and if they do, they're too exhausted to do anything but flop in front of the TV.

I think this sense of lack of community is increasingly common... a handful of us tried to set up a Transition Town group here, but it was like flogging a dead horse. We ended up exhausted & really didn't feel we'd got anywhere; either this town isn't ready to think about a future that might not be just like the present only with more upmarket clothing shops & electronic gadgets, or we were the wrong people to try to do this. But everyone wished us well (only they were too busy to actually do anything) and told us how they felt the old sense of community was dwindling away...

Lynplatinum

Where I live some of us talk and invite folk in but my immediate neighbours dont and consider me rather peculiar because I have the courtesy to inform them when I am going away. Once I joked 'Well at least you'll know I haven't fallen down the stairs and broken me neck.' the response was 'Why would that be of concern to me.' I have stopped taking in parcels for that side (and they seem to buy something several times a week but never to be there to receive them!) by contrast the next door but one person is a palliative care nurse and when I broke my leg last year was always popping in, getting shopping for me etc. I went to their wedding and feed their cats when they are on hols!!! Its not all bad but the mood ones are younger folk :-(

maman

I think it's just because of the changes in society that old style has become forum based rather than within communities. Sad maybe but a reflection of modern life.