Wife Destroying Credit Rating

Thrugelmir

duracellfrankie wrote: »

solicitor has mentioned mediation which i've agreed to, she won't want to pay for it so it will probably be a non runner.

Hopefully her solicitor will suggest the route also. Other wise the legal bills will mount.

solicitor did mention about downsizing but then in the current state of affairs neither of us will be credit worthy to start another mortgage.

Separation isn't easy. If finances are tight then may tip over the edge anyway.

Voyager2002

duracellfrankie wrote: »

solicitor has mentioned mediation which i've agreed to, she won't want to pay for it so it will probably be a non runner.

solicitor did mention about downsizing but then in the current state of affairs neither of us will be credit worthy to start another mortgage.

my daughter is 14 and my son 9 so I look like I've got 9 years of this unless she hopefully meets someone else and she buys me out/moves in and we can sell

If mediation works it can save the enormous legal costs of fighting it out in court... so even if you were to pay the entire cost of mediation, that might end up saving you a good deal.

As for the house and downsizing... the reality is that if the present situation continues the house will get repossessed, costing you both a lot of money and leaving you both with ruined credit ratings. So to avoid that it makes sense to downsize, even if that means moving into rented accommodation.

In the short term, it makes sense for you to pay child maintenance directly to the mortgage lender: this will reduce that amount that she has to pay for a place to live and ensure that the children have a roof while some more permanent arrangement is made.

kazwookie

Can you move back into the house?

Pixie5740

Downsizing doesn't necessarily mean buying a smaller/cheaper property. One or both of you could rent.

Unless there's a repayment vehicle in place to repay the capital at the end of the mortgage term it will need to be sold anyway as you've already said.

*~Zephyr~*

kazwookie wrote: »

Can you move back into the house?

Took the words out of my mouth.

Move back in. Even if you have to share a room with your son, it's a better option than risking having the house repossessed at some point OR having an adverse affect on your business.

I'm sure your girlfriend won't be keen, but its short term pain for long term gain. And it makes more sense than throwing everything away.

amnblog

*~Zephyr~* wrote: »

I'm sure your girlfriend won't be keen

I know it is only 8:20am - but this must win today's award for understatement!

kellaree

duracellfrankie wrote: »

I pay my child maintenance direct to wife, I am unable to pay any more towards mortgage as I have my own rent and monthly outgoings

I'm extremely surprised it's taken you this long to realise that if your wife couldn't afford the mortgage that it wasn't going to get paid if you moved out........

At the end of the day, you are BOTH responsible for the mortgage and if you've moved out and taken on a rental on top that's your issue.

Helping pay towards YOUR mortgage isn't 'doing her a favour', it's ensuring you don't throw your equity away. Separations are difficult and I can understand that you are upset but you need to look at this from a non-emotional place otherwise you won't get anywhere. Sort this out ASAP with a solicitor and do what's best for yourself and your children. Even if that means helping your ex at the same time.

coco_lew

This happened to me, my partner and I broke up after 14 months of living together in 2008. I advised the mortgage company id vacated the property and my ex was starting proceedings of taking me off the mortgage.

After failing 4 times to do this, he deicded to vacate the property himself (2012) and rent it out (without me or the mortgage company knowing). The lady renting the house off him decided to not pay after 3 months of being in there. The mortgage company didnt advise me of any mispayments until 4 were missing in a row.

Once i found out, i offered to pay the debt and continue to pay the mortgage until the house was sold. The lady decided to claim squatters rights and took her a year to get her out. My ex (abusive controlling) refused to help with payments and said he just wanted i repossessed even though he knew it would both financially ruin us.

Id advise you speak to your lawyer, take out mediation and get aggreements set up. I wish i had of done, its 2020 until ill be able to get a mortgage.

Awful situation. Good luck.