Advice about my manager

Markb06

Looking for advice on my situation. Wondering if I am being OTT or if it is justified.

I am a assistant manager working 40 hours a week and currently been there for 7 years.


I went away on holiday from work from 1/8 until 20/8. During this time I had made plans with my Dad and brother to have a "man" day. Watch some football and just a general get together. We picked this weekend due to the midlands derby. My partner and kids are also going as they are having a get together with my step mum while we watch the football.

The only time I checked my rota was to make sure I wasn't in on the Sunday I had arranged to see my dad and I wasn't. When I returned to work I logged into the rota to see my shifts ahead and noticed I was put in for the Sunday I had arranged with my dad as a staff meeting. The meeting is today (13/09/15 just in case anyone is reading this on another day) No communication was given to me about the meeting and I only found out because I found it myself.

Fast forward to the 1st September I needed the day off. I will spare the details but will say I needed to go to the social services as a previously closed case with my son involved and my ex needed to be opened and I needed to go up to the social as I had grave concerns for me son. I rang up my manager on the Friday as soon as I found out about these concerns to say I need to go to the social. I took a day in lieu and got cover for my shift so the business was not short.

I returned on the Wednesday to find out my manager had also give himself a lieu day on the Wednesday without mentioning it to me but had arranged no cover so it left me short on the day. When I questioned him about it he said it had been on the rota for a week. It hadn't. I checked the rota before calling him on the Friday to make sure I could take the day off to go to Social Services. He was in. When I questioned this he got quite aggressive and started to raise his voice to make me back down.

Now back to the meeting. He asked me on Friday if I could go and I said I am not sure as I made plans. He said it was on the rota for 6 weeks. I know it wasn't as I got told by other staff. And he said I should of been checking the rota when I was on my holidays.

I said I will speak to my dad as obviously it was more then just me going. Was my family to and he said "Don't forget when I helped you out on that Tuesday" now this is where I need advice really.

To me this seems like guilt tripping me into cancelling my plans to go to a 2 hour meeting on my day off.

Am I being OTT?

There are other instances where he raises his voice or will argue to get me to back off but this is the main one which has got on my wick.

Sorry for the long post and hopefully someone will have some advice.

Many thanks.

theoretica

Markb06 wrote: »

Now back to the meeting. He asked me on Friday if I could go and I said I am not sure as I made plans.

In hindsight 'I'm not sure' was an opening for negotiation, or guilt tripping. Sorry I made plans before it was on the rota wouldn't have given him the opening. Or to have been the one to bring it up when you noticed the clash.

Shouting is unprofessional, but trying to get a staff member in who has said 'I'm not sure' or working on a give and take system both seem reasonable to me.

HappyMJ

Markb06 wrote: »

Looking for advice on my situation. Wondering if I am being OTT or if it is justified.

I am a assistant manager working 40 hours a week and currently been there for 7 years.


I went away on holiday from work from 1/8 until 20/8. During this time I had made plans with my Dad and brother to have a "man" day. Watch some football and just a general get together. We picked this weekend due to the midlands derby. My partner and kids are also going as they are having a get together with my step mum while we watch the football.

The only time I checked my rota was to make sure I wasn't in on the Sunday I had arranged to see my dad and I wasn't. When I returned to work I logged into the rota to see my shifts ahead and noticed I was put in for the Sunday I had arranged with my dad as a staff meeting. The meeting is today (13/09/15 just in case anyone is reading this on another day) No communication was given to me about the meeting and I only found out because I found it myself.

Fast forward to the 1st September I needed the day off. I will spare the details but will say I needed to go to the social services as a previously closed case with my son involved and my ex needed to be opened and I needed to go up to the social as I had grave concerns for me son. I rang up my manager on the Friday as soon as I found out about these concerns to say I need to go to the social. I took a day in lieu and got cover for my shift so the business was not short.

I returned on the Wednesday to find out my manager had also give himself a lieu day on the Wednesday without mentioning it to me but had arranged no cover so it left me short on the day. When I questioned him about it he said it had been on the rota for a week. It hadn't. I checked the rota before calling him on the Friday to make sure I could take the day off to go to Social Services. He was in. When I questioned this he got quite aggressive and started to raise his voice to make me back down.

Now back to the meeting. He asked me on Friday if I could go and I said I am not sure as I made plans. He said it was on the rota for 6 weeks. I know it wasn't as I got told by other staff. And he said I should of been checking the rota when I was on my holidays.

I said I will speak to my dad as obviously it was more then just me going. Was my family to and he said "Don't forget when I helped you out on that Tuesday" now this is where I need advice really.

To me this seems like guilt tripping me into cancelling my plans to go to a 2 hour meeting on my day off.

Am I being OTT?

There are other instances where he raises his voice or will argue to get me to back off but this is the main one which has got on my wick.

Sorry for the long post and hopefully someone will have some advice.

Many thanks.

Whether it's currently on the rota or not if you want to ensure a day off then you need to be applying for a day off in advance so they cannot rota you in on that day. Not exactly sure how your workplace works but rota's are usually subject to change right up to a few days before the actual day of work.