stuck in the land of lost

lilpunkkitty

so I was diagnosed with depression since I was in my teens, I have the habit of spending makes me feel better thing going on and ended up in a lot of debt. I have a payment plan set up with stepchange, when I first moved into my house I only had a part time job and fell behind with my water so I am on a payment plan with them, i have council tax over payment so my council tax is higher than it would normally be and now I have had a letter saying i was paid too much housing benefit, which has equivalent to alot.
I am so confused and stuck i literally don't know what to do, I already scrimp and save as it is- i have no social life due to not being able to afford it so it is not like i throw money on luxury things.
I have applied to the council but they are no help at all- apparently i don't qualify for help with housing.
My family lives miles away and they have no room for me- i have no friends here. I am literally to the point i have no idea what i am doing what i can do. I already struggle and that is without my housing overpayment.
I can't stop crying, I have no motivation for my job, i just don't know what to do

rockm87

Hi and welcome. You've found the right place!

start with this:
http://www.stoozing.com/calculator/soa.php

so we can really see your situation. If you are already on a dmp, maybe you need to speak to them again and see if they can give you some support over the phone?

Sometimes it can feel like your scrimping and that money will make you happy, but it wont...you need to look beyond your situation at the good in your life.

Do you work? Is there someone at work you can socialise with, just to give you a break?

andyfromotley

hi lil,

Sorry to hear that things are hard for you at the moment. It is perfectly possible to have a social life that costs almost nothing, you need to look for activities that are free. The library is a good place to start. You should checkout meetup online which has loads of free things. Volunteering. running clubs tend to be super cheap or free, evening classes. Just be imaginative and willing to give anything a go.

twiggy86

Didn't want to read and run. I would do as rockm87 suggested and speak to stepchange to see if they can offer you any help, whether financially in changing your payment plan or just a supportive ear. And I would look into free things to do as Andy suggested. I've just started doing ParkRun which is a free 5km event and they're held all over so maybe look to see if there's one near you - mine are a very friendly supportive bunch. And if you don't fancy running it, the volunteers are much appreciated and just as much a part of the event. Hope things get better for you soon.

AspiringButAnxious

First of all, go to your doctor. You need medical help ASAP. You may need to take depressants/change your dose if you already take them and hopefully your GP will be able to offer you some talking therapy too. In the meantime, you can contact a charity like the Samaritans and get some support. You can phone or email and they will listen to your problems and provide reassurance and support.

Your priority is your health: everything else depends on your mental health being as good as it can be, so do whatever you can to improve it. I have a lot of experience of depression (and debt, for that matter) so feel free to PM me if you want to chat.

The next priority, as others have said, is to contact Stepchange. Debt can be scary and overwhelming, but it is possible to get out of it. Please talk to a close friend or relative if you can, because sharing your problems is a relief in itself. You may also be surprised at the practical help they can offer — and they can support you without living nearby.

The important thing to remember is that this too shall pass. You will not always feel like this and you will not always be in debt. It doesn't feel like it at the moment, but you can regain control of your life.

dancingfairy

Well to be honest they'll have to fight over any 'spare' money you have. Your first priority is to try and stay on top of the regular installmments of things and to eat, clothe yourself and have things like electricity. If paying off council tax debts means you can't pay water debts or paying water debts means you can pay housing benefit debts then that's tough. Stepchange should be able to help and tell you whether you should split your 'spare money between all of them or whether one should be prioritised. If you are struggling then go back to Stepchange and ask them to relook at things, perhaps your budget is too tight and you are scrimping too much to repay your creditors?
Another thing to consider is whether a dmp is right for you now. You may find that a DRO to give you a clean break might be better (although you'd need to check whether you qualify and what debts are included).
df