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New to all this and desperate for help

Shine69
Posts: 6 Forumite
This is the first time I have ever used a forum and ever sought help and advice for anything outside of my family.
in the last year myself my wife and two children have moved home so I could take a higher paid job in a better area (in our opinion) We have a lovely home with potential to extend and make it what we have dreamed about.
However the job was not what it seemed and came to an end at the beginning of January, as I have never been out of work this didn't worry me as much as i expected and i started a new job in February but on less money, and now the reality is biting and I can't seem to catch a break.
On top of this we have learned that my father has a terminal illness and I'm worried i won't be able to afford to travel back and forth to help my Mum.
I need to get a plan together and am looking for the tools to help me i have read some bits and bobs but I can't get my head in the game at present and i can only explain this away by saying that i can not relax my mind its going a million miles an hour and I'm starting to really worry and i'm now worrying about coming across as a bit of a wuss.
i know I'm in debt I know its not good i owe my parents money which they don't want back but I want to at least try to pay it £25K and on top of this i owe around 16K in Credit
I'm on 28k a year with no potential for overtime or extra I'm looking for a second job to boost my income.
my wife is working part time around the children earning around 5.6k
I need to budget and now my debt and am looking for a spreadsheet or finance tool?
and to talk about it!!!!!!! Please.
in the last year myself my wife and two children have moved home so I could take a higher paid job in a better area (in our opinion) We have a lovely home with potential to extend and make it what we have dreamed about.
However the job was not what it seemed and came to an end at the beginning of January, as I have never been out of work this didn't worry me as much as i expected and i started a new job in February but on less money, and now the reality is biting and I can't seem to catch a break.
On top of this we have learned that my father has a terminal illness and I'm worried i won't be able to afford to travel back and forth to help my Mum.
I need to get a plan together and am looking for the tools to help me i have read some bits and bobs but I can't get my head in the game at present and i can only explain this away by saying that i can not relax my mind its going a million miles an hour and I'm starting to really worry and i'm now worrying about coming across as a bit of a wuss.
i know I'm in debt I know its not good i owe my parents money which they don't want back but I want to at least try to pay it £25K and on top of this i owe around 16K in Credit
I'm on 28k a year with no potential for overtime or extra I'm looking for a second job to boost my income.
my wife is working part time around the children earning around 5.6k
I need to budget and now my debt and am looking for a spreadsheet or finance tool?
and to talk about it!!!!!!! Please.
0
Comments
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Hi, welcome to MSE!!
First of all breath!!
2nd is to possibly sit down with your partner and your bank statements from the last couple of months even a years worth and work out where money is going. Either put a film on for the little ones or playing, age dependent! a nice big cuppa and fill in an Statement of affars someone will be along shortly with the link to it.
Post it back on here and the lovely people will be able to help with spending and a budget and where to cut down.
Pop over to the old style board they are a wealth of knowledge on cutting down on household experiences, food, cleaning etc.
Good LuckThanks to money saving tips and debt repayments/becoming debt free I have been able to work and travel for the last 4 years visiting 12 countries and working within 3 of them. Currently living and working in Canada :beer: :dance:0 -
Hi Shine,
fill this in http://www.stoozing.com/calculator/soa.php and post it on here and we can see the full picture.
Chat to your parents, tell them that you fully intend to pay the money back, but that you need to get your finances in order first. That will ease any tension you feel. and you can concentrate on what matters.
Don't worry to much, there is no debt situation that cannot be resolved. You sound hard working and as if you have a positive can do attitude, you will be fine.£1000 Emergency fund No90 £1000/1000
LBM 28/1/15 total debt - [STRIKE]£23,410[/STRIKE] 24/3/16 total debt - £7,298
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Once you have done your SOA & put it up here for people to advise on, I highly recommend you try using You Need a Budget. You can trial it for 30 days and then after your trial you can buy it if you want to.
It has helped me massively and is a great way to keep track of how much money you have available to spend, but not just how much money is in your bank account, but how much of that money is available for the particular category, e.g Groceries, fuel etc.
I went from having a £250 overdraft and constantly using my credit cards, to paying off my overdraft in the first month and not using any credit cards at all. All within the trial period. Since then I have been able to build up savings as well as paying off the remaining credit card debt.
Good luck0 -
Thanks guys I wasn't planning on blurting out like that but i think i needed to get it off my chest.
Saza I am lucky that your reply was the first I got I did breath and I feel a little relieved. Thank you.
Andy thanks for the link I will complete it over the next couple of days and post it back here.
Mission I already have Ynab which i guess does the same thing but I haven't mastered how to use it yet so I'm not sure I wanna spend out on another, but who knows so thank you for the advice.0 -
Thanks guys I wasn't planning on blurting out like that but i think i needed to get it off my chest.
Saza I am lucky that your reply was the first I got I did breath and I feel a little relieved. Thank you. :A
Andy thanks for the link I will complete it over the next couple of days and post it back here.
Mission I already have Ynab which i guess does the same thing but I haven't mastered how to use it yet so I'm not sure I wanna spend out on another, but who knows so thank you for the advice.0 -
Ynab = you need a budget. Its the same thing.
Make sure you find time to learn how it works it can revolutionise your finances. (it did for me).£1000 Emergency fund No90 £1000/1000
LBM 28/1/15 total debt - [STRIKE]£23,410[/STRIKE] 24/3/16 total debt - £7,298
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I told you i hadn't mastered it yet!! lol0
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How are you doing shine? Welcome to MSE. Are you sleeping or are you over stressed about your debts? Have you spoke to the Mrs at all?
Do take the time to do an SOA and post it - then people can try to help and suggest ideas.
Best of luck - thinking of you!Grocery challenge Feb £107/£100-epic fail due to cake and biscuits
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Thanks guys I wasn't planning on blurting out like that but i think i needed to get it off my chest.
Saza I am lucky that your reply was the first I got I did breath and I feel a little relieved. Thank you. :A
Andy thanks for the link I will complete it over the next couple of days and post it back here.
Mission I already have Ynab which i guess does the same thing but I haven't mastered how to use it yet so I'm not sure I wanna spend out on another, but who knows so thank you for the advice.
Hi Shine,
Glad you found somewhere to get all that off your chest.
You might also want to consider looking at the Stepchange online debt remedy, it's free and can be anonymous if you wish but it will make you think about what you spend and what you should be saving for (to stop further debts). If you don't have a budget you will get caught out with those expenses that spring up on us.
On a slightly different note, while I realise your finance are integral at t the moment, don't get so focussed on the financial and practical side of things you forget what's important about spending time with your folks. Remember that one day you won't be able to ask those questions/say those things/share those momentsDebt -it's a fight that I'm winning, dealing with debt one day at a time.
Estimated DFD August 2018 - 2031 - now 2027 :T
Guide dog Tess, missing Scotland 2 years
DMP support no438.0 -
I have done my SOA and here are the results.
[tt]Statement of Affairs and Personal Balance Sheet
Household Information
Number of adults in household........... 2
Number of children in household......... 2
Number of cars owned.................... 2
Monthly Income Details
Monthly income after tax................ 1782
Partners monthly income after tax....... 480
Benefits................................ 134
Other income............................ 0
Total monthly income.................... 2396
Monthly Expense Details
Mortgage................................ 983.7
Secured/HP loan repayments.............. 170
Rent.................................... 0
Management charge (leasehold property).. 0
Council tax............................. 133
Electricity............................. 51
Gas..................................... 0
Oil..................................... 45
Water rates............................. 0
Telephone (land line)................... 41
Mobile phone............................ 40
TV Licence.............................. 12.12
Satellite/Cable TV...................... 30
Internet Services....................... 0
Groceries etc. ......................... 300
Clothing................................ 10
Petrol/diesel........................... 200
Road tax................................ 22.5
Car Insurance........................... 46
Car maintenance (including MOT)......... 25
Car parking............................. 0
Other travel............................ 0
Childcare/nursery....................... 0
Other child related expenses............ 0
Medical (prescriptions, dentist etc).... 10
Pet insurance/vet bills................. 33
Buildings insurance..................... 21
Contents insurance...................... 15.4
Life assurance ......................... 33.9
Other insurance......................... 0
Presents (birthday, christmas etc)...... 66
Haircuts................................ 6
Entertainment........................... 0
Holiday................................. 0
Emergency fund.......................... 0
Total monthly expenses.................. 2294.62
Assets
Cash.................................... 67
House value (Gross)..................... 240000
Shares and bonds........................ 40
Car(s).................................. 3000
Other assets............................ 2000
Total Assets............................ 245107
Secured & HP Debts
Description....................Debt......Monthly...APR
Mortgage...................... 175300...(983.7)....2.95
Hire Purchase (HP) debt ...... 7000.....(170)......0
Total secured & HP debts...... 182300....-.........-
Unsecured Debts
Description....................Debt......Monthly...APR
Sofa...........................940.......40........0
Halifax Credit card............6530......69.75.....0
Nationwide Credit car..........1950.97...44.67.....15.9
Outstanding Gas bill...........293.......10........00
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