The Elite:The Good, The Bad and the Glitchy

Sunshinemummy

I am rather proud of myself. This weekend I have wrote 3 large reports... about 10 days in the office... my bum is sore.... but is has (sadly or sensibly) been an ideal excuse to isolate myself from the goings on in OH's family!.... why do people always argue. Please do not answer that last question.

Right I am off to bed as I have to be in the car for 5.30 am!

Mildred1970

Sunshinemummy wrote: »

I did once get reported for inappropriate language.. I got a warning. I just cannot understand this one;)

I was also PPR'd once... someone was stirring! The annoying bit was that they did not give an explanation!

Hey ho x

You are very naughty :):D:cool:

purpledonkey

Sunshinemummy wrote: »

If they were sensitive, I think myself, PD, EmP, QOC, Cheery and many more would be reported all the time!

Very true, I am on that list although not recently :think:

purpledonkey

Absolutely gutted tonight. My recent baking job fell through before I could actually do some proper baking. After today I have no booked work until October

Savvybuyer

davemorton wrote: »

lol @ latest HE advert, where it says " Please dont shampoo your eyes". :eek:

Content warning: Contains discussions related to stress.

Hello everyone - I'm just coming into the thread and noticing this and my thought, which also happens to relate to what I am posting, is that obviously they need to warn about a lot of other things; anyway...

I'm sorry folks (this isn't a genuine apology btw but merely an expression of regret) but, quite apart from the fact that I'm just waking up in the middle of the night, I very much doubt that I will be going to M today. And I doubt that I'll be going on Wednesday either as, yet again, I have something arranged for Wednesday evening which cuts down the time left elsewhere on that day and makes it more difficult. That said, I've managed it before - as it doesn't take more than a couple of hours in M (not as much changes in M on Wednesdays, generally).

This is quite apart from the fact that there are now traffic closures that make it much more difficult to get to one of my Ms. Forgive me if I go into an obsessive mode of posting - I'll try not to - but I have been having a bad time in the past 24 hours or so as I've had a number of PTSD (post-traumatic stress disorder) triggers in the last couple of weeks or so, one of them about five days ago and a number in the last couple of days, and been suffering a number of PTSD episodes in last 48 hours, initially not so severe and short-lived but now quite persistent.

I've not been formally diagnosed with PTSD - it would be the complex form of PTSD - that is to say PTSD that arises from a series of 'small' events in your life rather than from one major shock in perhaps a combat situation (although I do not rule out the possibility that soldiers in war zones could experience a series of separate traumatic events and develop the complex form of the disorder) - but complex PTSD can occur in any situation in which a person has experienced repeated causes of stress or distress and is not confined to major traumatic events of life-threatening nature. Indeed, for me, seemingly 'minor' events have caused me significant upset whilst I've been able to deal with major shocks far more well. Major shocks go far beyond and push you way over the edge that you just get weary and think 'things can't get any worse' and then, bizarrely, see the funny side, whilst minor shocks, especially ones repeated over a period of months and years, are more irritating and far more persistent. I could have been physically assaulted, had a bruise for a number of weeks and then it would have healed, but, instead, a series of things supposedly much less severe has left me with emotional disorder and had a life-changing effect on my life.

Although I haven't been diagnosed, it's clear to me it is PTSD and, as a person separately who has Asperger's syndrome, I look at and study these sorts of things in depth and therefore I'm undoubtedly correct to know it is PTSD. (I rarely 'know' anything in my life, because usually I'm unsure - on studying something I see different people have different opinions and I am therefore objectively unable to accept or reject any of them and end up 'not knowing' - "the more I find out, the less I know" - at one time I thought I knew, now, after looking at all the different opinions, maybe I don't - so, for me to know something is extremely rare. I was commenting on my use of the word "know":rotfl:, that is in "know it is PTSD".)

I know it's PTSD. I have suffered all the symptoms mentioned on a PTSD website (even though I also acknowledge that making diagnoses from what you see on the internet isn't always the way). I am re-experiencing and revisiting emotional feelings - such as heart racing and quivvering - that I had following the final in a long series of "traumatic" events that happened five years ago.

(I put "traumatic" in quotes not because it is a personal opinion of mine that the events were traumatic or that they should have been, but that they obviously were in terms of their emotional impact on me and what they have made me feel - i.e. the heart-racing etc.)

I've not been diagnosed although I am considering that, for one or two reasons, an official diagnosis might be useful and I am not seeking anyone's opinion on whether I should seek one or not - I do not need you to tell me and I do not want you to do so, although I will not be offended if you do. Sorry to go on but perhaps I just need to get this off my chest (and not literally - my chest actually, literally, feels awful at the moment as I am suffering a stress event).

It was a number of separate things on broadcasting, that they never see the need to warn about whilst warning me about all sorts of things that "some people may find distressing" that never manage to cause me distress (perhaps wrongly, perhaps not) and which would, I suspect, not cause me any distress at all even if they did not forewarn about them (although then they may distress others, but then again...). The latest was a video that came on, again, in a news report - it had been on two or three days before (about three times, one of which I saw, without warning, but fortunately didn't concentrate on too much so the PTSD event was fairly shortlived, the second of which I saw and did concentrate on to try and work it out - the PTSD event a little more but again not that severe - a bit of heart-racing for under a minute - fortunately the Guardian newspaper has published an uncensored version and I've actually gone and watched it and, as expected, it turned out to be far less severe than what I imagined, which I suspected at the time of the 'broadcast' one it would be - but then again I never had problems with uncensored material so that does not cause any PTSD trigger (it seems that that is the case, judging by the emotional causings of what has been caused to me - the Guardian video, no PTSD event thereafter - it did not contain any trigger material - the broadcast one did - PTSD episodes experienced).)

Anyway, the latest airing, yet again the video just came on, was late last night (what day are we on? - it was on Saturday night) - I wasn't paying much attention to the TV at all, then my attention was drawn as I noticed the video start - I managed to switch it off within five seconds of its start - and none of the 'trigger' material had at that point been broadcast - but then I experienced a PTSD event that lasted for a full hour (heart-racing), not helped by a loss of internet connection that then happened to happen on my computer and frustration over that - I quit and went to bed - I spent the entire of yesterday in bed - I woke up on a couple of occasions and heart was racing. Now it's been racing and also now quivvering occasionally - at one stage I nearly started shaking but not quite - and it's quite bad and anxiety now in my chest. Okay, I will now go to the doctor, even though there's not much that can be done - they can prescribe pills but I don't feel that's of much use - they may be able to give the official diagnosis - which might be of help (namely if I wish to sue the backside off any company that has been playing out any of this material that has caused me distress - I note I'd better get my stakes on, so to speak, as it's nearly six years and there is a six-year limitation period - it would be a groundbreaking case, but, possibly not, but anyway...) but, as regards the latest (and most serious, as regards more recent) PTSD episode, I'm going to just have to get over it. Take deep breathes and calm.

Thanks for listening - if anyone does want to contact me and discuss it (by PM) then please do - when I get to clearing my inbox and possibly I'm going off now and only catch up when/if I come back. Please don't use any trigger material in your email (i.e. asterisked, dashed words - sorry for any offence), unless you do so to utter excess (as you're clearly having a joke) and thus end up making me fall over laughing:rotfl::rotfl:. But no, probably best to avoid it entirely - and even avoid excess in case it does trigger me (I can't always predict when it will or won't). Probably best to avoid exclamation marks in a row now, given that they have also, thanks to this site, been associated with my trigger and hence potentially triggering themselves. Just like the word "trigger" is a trigger as that itself contains a reminder - this is not joke but actually does happen to some other people who have PTSD since anything that reminds them of their experiences - wish I could snap my fingers and turn that quivvering of my heart off - can lead to them reliving the event.

Hey ho. I guess I was given this so as to be able to understand what living with PTSD is like, and thus helping me to understand what other people who have it, from various causes, which I think rationally ought to be more severe than mine, might experience. The stress events five years ago led to a referral to a psychologist and also ended up leading to my Asperger's diagnosis, so that positive came from it and in fact the very day of my diagnosis was from which time the entire stress from before stopped and I got better and better and better. My depression went, although it is still underlying, in the background, dormant but still there, but now I have this PTSD. As a matter of fact, I like my Asperger's and it gives me certain beneficial things - perhaps I ought to think about that more and it will made me feel really good and be a distraction - it's distraction technique that has to be used to take you away from the PTSD events. The thought - I'm not actually visualising the situations, although maybe I am now (that's how it works - tell yourself not to think about something and you are thinking that very thing) - it's the mere thought that then seems to cause this physical symptoms that I can now feel. I'll go to bed and try and get some rest.

Yeah I do - I have been having an obsessional train of thought for possibly about ten hours and then later again ten hours - though I've not kept track of time - and that obsession caused by my Asperger's and me having a specialist interest, from time to time, in the very thing that is the subject of my PTSD(:rotfl:, you have to laugh sometimes and see the funny side - certainly although not funny to experience the bad heart feelings that I am) and (in the sense of the 'reliving' thing) the obsession is also part of the PTSD.

Ooh - feeling a bit better now, though there is an ache there. It's just - random and unpredictable emotional effects. Anyway, best not get too bogged down into the specialist topic of the study of human emotional impacts and effects:rotfl:. Thanks folks - not feeling totally okay but will get better and back to normal (i.e. neutral state) - for anyone that's had depression, sometimes the depression becomes the "normal" state, but you know what I mean - back to feeling before I had depression - and for anyone else that has had it or has it - I feel for you (fortunately not literally:rotfl:) and I do know what depression is like, or what my depression is like at any rate.

Assuring you, I will stay alive!
Thanks:wave:.

[EDIT: Oops, came in to here 2.15am, now 3.49am, still here...] Anyway, back to bed (for now)! [EDIT 2: Some people reading this may think I've been taking things beyond literal and getting too touchy/me being too sensitive etc., and you may be thinking "You don't need to let this affect you the way it is", "Calm down - why do you let this get to you?" etc. etc., but, for anyone who has PTSD, or indeed depression, will know that it's not a case that you can just snap out and that the point is not that I am touchy or sensitive (I assure you that I can deal with 'severe material' in some circumstances, indeed a lot of circumstances) but that there is a trigger, or different triggering things, they cause me to think certain patterns of thinking, and things like my heart going just seem to happen - and only when, or immediately after, I've thought about that thing that's, once again, been triggered. In a sense, it's 'ridiculous', because a car engine could go off and remind someone that got run over in a series car accident, where the car revved off afterwards, obviously one where they survived, of that event and cause the trigger if they suffered PTSD as a result, so are you going to warn people about car engines? Or if they happen to be walking along the street and a car revves past, at a certain frequency, etc.... Triggers are a part of life - I think I have to accept that and manage it. Besides, warning of something that's going to trigger would itself remind me of the trigger and thus be a trigger itself - I didn't even need to see/hear the trigger material on that video on its last broadcast and it's that last broadcast that has now set off the most extensive period of PTSD and had such an effect. (The 'avoidance', the switching it off, is also a symptom. Right... I should be explaining this to the doctor, although for me face-to-face communication is not as easy - I have to remember the entire of what I want to say which is not easy and that problem is because of my Asperger's. Then they'll ask some question in between and I'll lose the thread of my prepared lecture(:laugh:). Perhaps surgeries should make reasonable adjustments like allowing patients to communicate with the doctor in writing?:think: As that would allow me to express things properly, while I fumble and not explain myself face-to-face and then the doctor won't get to know what I should have told them (perhaps I should print this off?) - although that's if I could request a reasonable adjustment in face-to-face at reception itself, without being misunderstood - not always easy for the person who has Asperger's! (:rotfl:It's very interesting, it does give rise to these interesting situations and conundra does Asperger's. I think I just invented a new word again:rotfl:. Laughing in text but -- oh, come on, heart get better! Folks, I will be well, don't worry.)]

Savvybuyer

Sunshinemummy wrote: »

I did once get reported for inappropriate language.. I got a warning. I just cannot understand this one;)

I was also PPR'd once... someone was stirring! The annoying bit was that they did not give an explanation!

Hey ho x

Oops, I'd better not notice this - good job I've not seen any earlier page on the thread. For me, the word "inappropriate" is one of the most vague words (although, yeah, I might 'know' what it might mean but like I said, I more I find out...). But, anyway...

My view is that, if someone is annoyed, seriously, then the person (or organisation) causing the annoyance should apologise and cease causing it. That, to me, is inappropriate (the failure to apologise for causing anyone annoyance (that's if it, seriously, is annoyance)) - as it's not right to upset anyone and therefore, "inappropriate" = "not right or proper", it is not right, therefore squarely within the meaning: anyway, I'd best not go there before I start getting annoyed by it myself and then having that trigger me. Maybe this post (mine now here) is "inappropriate" for being possible to be perceived by someone as being underlying challenging what's inappropriate. I suppose people don't have to give explanations as to why they object or wish to PPR. But, then again, should people ever be allowed to cause anyone undue annoyance? What's that? - Is that ever right in a society that claims to entitle us to respect? They always have these rules, they've never completely defined, it's always the people with them that most break them! And, that, potentially, is annoying - although fortunately I'm not getting annoyed by it at this time!

(Best ones are "non-exhaustive lists" of what might constitute unacceptable behaviour. But they are non-exhaustive and therefore not completely defined! So they haven't expressly defined what they mean and aren't clear yet again! But, anyway, leaving that as may be. In theory, I don't know. In practice, I think I have a rough idea. But then begs the question as to why the 'definition' (which is incomplete and therefore useless) needed to be given in the first place. Why do people need to be informed that they should not behave unacceptably? They ought to know that already. Common sense:rotfl:*.)

Goodnight folks:rotfl:.

*A matter sometimes lacking in the Asperger. The "problem" I have, again in theory, is the old one of the judge sending the jury out for a murder case - foreperson comes back, asks a question and the judge tells them to "use [their] common sense" - they go away and then eventually return - and they can't reach a verdict as they can't agree amongst themselves on what "common sense" is. So, it's not common sense after all! Different people have different ideas as to what is "common sense", or, more to the point, about what to do in a certain situation. Most times it does not matter - most people make a decision there and then and whatever happens happens. A person has their idea of common sense and simply does what they feel. It doesn't matter - there were a range of options and any could have worked. They picked their option and it was acceptable. The Asperger's person, at the outset of all this, considers all the possible options and can't reach a decision as they can't decide which person's "common sense" is any more valid than the other:rotfl:. We see all possible options and interpretations and can't decide. You see just one and go for it. So, it's not (always+) as easy for persons who have Asperger's (+in other words, implies that, sometimes, it is as easy). I see lots of alternative options etc. But, in practice, I "know" what to do. Possibly:rotfl:.

In theory, I've no idea what "common sense" is. In practice, I probably have a fairly good idea. (I can't be doing much wrong as I've got through life without getting into much trouble so far.)

But, ask me to use my common sense. Asperger's person's reply: "What's that?:p":rotfl::rotfl::rotfl: (And then the story of the judge and jury told again infinitum, and to the point of boredom:rotfl:...)

Asperger's can be "fun" sometimes. (Note the important quotation marks, but, no, sometimes it can be fun.) And to imagine that I'm a real person:rotfl:.

I'd better say goodnight again, as I did that halfway through this post lol:rotfl:.
Goodnight:D:):wave:.

elainemn

Good morning everyone. Extremely wet here today. Hope you all have a lovely Monday.

zappo_2

elainemn wrote: »

Good morning everyone. Extremely wet here today. Hope you all have a lovely Monday.

Hope relief and satisfaction are not too far away

streetlights

Good morning everybody, I hope you are well and have a fabulous Monday.

Happy shopping or jumping in puddles. Both could be be fun.

TrulyMadly

purpledonkey wrote: »

Absolutely gutted tonight. My recent baking job fell through before I could actually do some proper baking. After today I have no booked work until October

Oh .....:o

Sorry to hear this PD.......is there a plan B?