In over my head, with no end in sight.

Protocol45

My tale of woe started about 18 months ago. I was originally working full time doing shift work. The money was good and I alone managed to keep the flat afloat. The money was also good enough for me to take out a few “loans” too. I got our new sofa for our flat from DFS and was paying £50 a month for it. I also got a new TV of Littlewoods (bad idea I know) and that was about £35 a month for that. I managed to pay everything on time and with no problem.
Then it happened, I got fired. First time that has happened and hit our family for six. I went in job seekers immediately and tried to claim for every benefit we could (we have 1 son and another on the way in June this year). But it wasn’t enough. Soon, I started to default on all these debts. Eventually my girlfriend got a fulltime job but the money isn’t great. We can pay the rent, council tax, put food on the table and keep the car running, but that is it. It has gotten to the point where we can’t even pay for electric. Here is roughly what I owe:

• Three Mobile - £70. Originally owed them £30 but they have now escalated it up and added a fee of £40 on top.
• DFS - £550
• Littlewoods £333
• Cooperative Energy - £1899 and rising. I have no paid them any money for over 2 months now.
• Gas – £xx unknown, but I would guess at around £350.
• Paypal - £220, owed from a screwed up mobile phone sale, long story there.
• Rent arrears, private rental - £325.
• Council Tax £120 – Need to be up to date before the end of this month or they said they will have to do court proceedings. We will need to Wonga for this, no way out of it, family cannot help. Rather owe Wonga than the council, I think, I dunno.

I did initially contact most of these companies and explain my situation. But, while I understand they are under no obligation to write off debts or lower monthly payments, the offers they have me were not good enough for my situation. DFS for example (or Creation finance to be accurate) demanded the full payment and not a penny less. When I say I can’t afford to pay them a tenner each, I literally mean it.

I was also a heavy smoker and since migrated to Vaping, which has saved me a considerable amount of money, from £250 a month to only £30 a month currently. If that.

I have also sold nearly everything I can in the house to help put food on the table. Xboxes, playstations, DVD’s, games. We have even had to use cheques sent for our sons birthday to buy food, disgraceful. I have now got to the phase of burying my head in the sand. I’ve not spoken to these companies for months, nor paid them. I cannot afford anything anymore and with another baby on the way, I will now have to find a job while my partner “Swaps” and she becomes the stay at home parent.

It is all seriously piling up and the stress is incredible. I am thinking perhaps going down the debt management road, but I don’t know where to start, last time I used a company who charged to do it for me, rip off. Any advice here is appreciate, I don’t know what else to do, or who else to turn to.

Puzzcat

Hi,


If you are considering a dmp head over to stepchange's website and enter your infomation into the debt remedy tool. This will give you an idea of what is available.


Puzz.

thriftylass

Hi and welcome. The first important step is done, asking for advice and trying to change things.

It would help if you could post a SOA (statement of affairs, search these threads there is a template somewhere) listing all your income and outgoings.

Your total debt is not that bad. It totals only 3864 if I added correctly. Have you been out of work now for 18 months? What are the chance of finding sth else. Even evening work etc to get around childcare expenses. What's done is done. I could ask how you managed to rack up 1899 debt with your energy supplier etc but the important thing is you are addressing the issue. At least it is now also getting lighter and warmer and the heating and lighting bill should come down drastically.

Definitely post a SOA and we might be able to give further advice from there.


I'm not entirely sure but I think there are debt management companies or help/advice agencies that are funded by the government and free.
Good luck

asparagus1968

National debtline
Stepchange
Christians Against Poverty
All will help/advise for FREE.


Also, you could fill this statement of affairs out, may help people on here help/advise you as well. http://www.stoozing.com/calculator/soa.php


How is the job hunting going? Will your partner get maternity pay?


can you sell the tv and sofa (get replacements from freecycle/british heart foundation charity shop?)


good luck

Sinhanada

PUzzcat and thriftylass have it right. Post a SOA on here and you will get some good advice

Also I cannot recommend Stepchange highly enough. They are a charity that only help people like you by advising you of your best course of action, and if you decide to use them they will help you every step of the way.

I did use them up until last year and thanks to them I am now debt free and loving life.

It's a hard road, but you've made the most important decision by admitting the issues your facing and trying to deal with them.

Keep coming back here too, because some of the support you get is fantastic!

thriftylass

Protocol45 wrote: »

[*]Council Tax £120 – Need to be up to date before the end of this month or they said they will have to do court proceedings. We will need to Wonga for this, no way out of it, family cannot help. Rather owe Wonga than the council, I think, I dunno.
[/LIST]

Definitely DO NOT go down the Wonga route. This is just making it worse. Maybe rather try a budgeting loan (link in the word) from the governement? I'm sure someone will be along soon with another suggestion.

ampersand

'(we have 1 son and another on the way in June this year).'
then
'Eventually my girlfriend got a fulltime job but the money isn’t great.'
#
So you are not working, but [very] pregnant girlfriend is?
What jobs have you tried for?
You are not in a position to be choosy.

#
Looking at what you have sold and 'given up', shouts your need to think and perhaps understand for the first time, what being adult, a parent and raising a family actually entails.
What examples are you setting for 2 boys?
If this was the example you had, it hasn't worked, has it?
Why not break the chain?
#
DO NOT TOUCH WONGA.
#
I want to believe that you want to change, but looking back to your earliest posts, which refer to debts from 10 years previous, it seems fair to say you have never mastered basic budgeting or cared much about trying to mend your ways.

I'm not sure you are even interested in this Real Life essential skill or mature enough to care. You've limped along in Life so far and it's a feeble excuse.

My signature is probably just one more of those you regard as inevitable in sameold sameold replies. More fool you.

If you actually followed advice and saw something through, you'd soon enough be posting help for others like you, who need to see the light.

What else will prod you into wake-up mode?
####
To all who have just replied - yes, we have all busily tippy-tapped away, hoping to help - please note that protocol45's posting history repeats earlier, similar situations of nil budgeting sense. ccj records, overspending, a life on x-box.

Everyone can change - I simply hope protocol45 will apply rocket to backside this time, for the sake of partner and sons.

asparagus1968

have looked at your SOA from sept 2014:
these were your debts then-Littlewoods....................250.......50....... .0
DFS............................800.......40....... .0
Littlewoods (Partner)..........400.......50........0
Loan ..........................1000......14........0
Credit Card....................1000......25........0
Credit Card....................1500......40........0
Total unsecured debts..........4950......219.......-
plus a HP of £6000 is that the car?


what debts do you have now? you had a £235 a month shortfall to pay everything then, and suggestions to cut groceries of £400 to £200, saving £200 and satellite of £50 ,saving £50, reducing mobile packages, selling car and getting cheaper one ete etc.


please post up to date SOA , soon!

Protocol45

ampersand wrote: »

op - your latest Thread of woe is just a repeat of every other one you have ever started.

Much annoys me in your 'Not Me/Do Nothing/It's Fate' attitude.
This is typical: 'Firstly let me say apologies. For some reason, this site decided not to email me about updates to the thread so I'm only just reading them now.'
When you signed up to mse, you accepted the conditions and mechanics of forum usage.
There is not one that promises to be your hand maiden. What sort of ineffectual are you, beyond a slack work/life attitude and lack of gumption?
#
6 years 10 months of mse has done nothing to motivate or shame or change you.
Why are you bothering to post now?
What is the endgame for you?

Now, in lots of real life stuff I do, I DO work with intractables and I don't give up.
My signature is [another]one for you to Not be Bothered With, making you a hopeless case gift to the 2015 Tory Election campaign...and that I DO resent.

What purpose do you serve on here again? I see none. Yawn, boring drivel, you want to rant? Do a Vlog on youtube.

katy_ann

You need to post up a current SOA, then we can assess what you need to pay from their, rent and council tax are your main priorities at the moment.

KirstyO

As others have said we can help best if you post SOA, and also as others have said PayDay loans from any source will give you a big headache long term.


Regardless of your history, maybe things are now at breaking point and will encourage more than ever to change for good. I hope so. It will be stressful enough being parent of 2 without money worries. Get sorted now and at least you will have adapted to your new lifestyle by the time DS2 arrives.