Is being poor a matter of perspective??

midlander81

This is a great thread!


I agree that it's relative. We are currently on a DFW mission with over 40k of unsecured debt at the start of our journey. Despite this I can't say that we are 'poor' due to the following -

• We have equity in our home that exceeds our debt
• We take home well over £4k per month
• After paying our essential bills and debt payment (currently paying £1300 per month on debts) we have over £1000 left over

We eat well and enjoy life


I guess that a different person would look at my circumstances and think that I am poor but I don't think I am

DigForVictory

A matter of perspective?
[Insert name of whatever Deity/ies you choose to believe in], yes!
I have a job, a house, a car, family in health & education, and it's been a while since I lived on what were considered subsistence benefits.
I've not forgotten worrying about getting to the end of every fortnight, bills, The Unexpected - that latter bogeyman still lives under my financial bed but I've a creditcard with a how-on-Earth level of credit so most shocks & horrors that can be solved by cash to fend it off with. Plus a stuffed larder, fridge & freezer. Those savings may or may not earn me 4% interest but the tranquility of mind? Priceless!

We're not hugely asset rich, but I wouldn't want a massive Lottery win. I'd rather my lads do well at school & grow into nice folks who are pleasant & useful to have around.

Poor is in the eye of the beholder & when they can't see or value culture, health, humour, friendship? Pity them - they know not what they miss.

quantic

I think past a certain point wealth is definitely relative, once a person exceeds the point in which their means can pay for life's essentials the rest of it often comes down to how the person views life and also how they prioritise.

I suppose there are a couple ways to look at it, but the main ways I think about it are - trying not to think about what others have and avoid bench marking myself against them as there will always be someone more wealthy than yourself unless you are Bill Gates. Additionally, trying to think of wealth a little differently helps, I try to think of any wealth I have as security and not as a definition of MY worth.

It has a lot to do with what a person focuses on in life - most of the materially focused people I know feel the least wealthy (even if they give off a different impression), when you see someone who has all the flashy things but can't afford to go for lunch with their friends you know the balance is not quite right.

I remember reading something about stock brokers who earn £1m a year but felt poor because their managers earned £10m a year so they lived month to month. I try to remind myself this when getting off track.

I also strongly believe that once you pass the point of paying for essentials easily, the gains in terms of happiness are very minimal. E.g. Going from having no car to having ANY car will have a far bigger difference than going from having a car to a flash car will.

twiggy86

I came on here in October feeling very poor and down about money having just had my LBM and realised I had nearly £10k in debt. I earn quite a bit less than my friends and my OH is a self employed builder so nothing is guaranteed. However since then I've read numerous diaries and threads and realised how fortunate I am in that since concentrating on what I'm spending I've managed to pay off a good chunk of debt and not really make any major sacrifices (just being careful), whilst others are literally scrapping around for the minimum payments.

One of my friends recently asked me if I wanted to do something (cant remember what) but I said I couldn't afford to. Another friend also said she was so ridiculously poor at the moment - she then later went to Mr T and spent £50-£60 on making equipment! (Her latest fad, she likes fads!)

Being poor and feeling poor are very different things - feeling poor is having to make sacrifices, having to plan/save for purchases etc or maybe just having less money than you're used to - so that's subjective to the person. Being poor is not having money for day to day essentials like food and rent.

FireWyrm

Back through the years I go wonderin' once again
Back to the seasons of my youth
I recall a box of rags that someone gave us
And how my momma put the rags to use
There were rags of many colors and every piece was small
And I didn't have a coat and it was way down in the fall
Momma sewed the rags together sewin' every piece with love
She made my coat of many colors that I was so proud of
As she sewed, she told a story from the Bible, she had read
About a coat of many colors Joseph wore and then she said
"Perhaps this coat will brang you good luck and happiness"
And I just couldn't wait to wear it and momma blessed it with a kiss
My coat of many colors that my momma made for me
Made only from rags but I wore it so proudly
Although we had no money oh I was rich as I could be
In my coat of many colors my momma made for me
So with patches on my britches, holes in both my shoes
In my coat of many colors I hurried off to school
Just to find the others laughing and making fun of me
and my coat of many colors my momma made for me
And oh I couldn't understand that for I thought I was rich
And then I told them of the love my momma sewed in every stitch
And I told 'em all the story momma told me while she sewed
And why my coat of many colors was worth more than all their clothes
They didn't understand it and I tried to make them see
One is only poor only if you choose to be
It is true we had no money but I was rich as I could be
In my coat of many colors momma made for me
Made just for me

Dolly Parton. One of my favourite songs and sums the question up nicely dont you think.

One is only poor, only if they choose to be....

Out,_Vile_Jelly

Many of my friends earn more than me, but just seem to spend more; massive mortgages, run two cars, full Sky package, designer clothes and branded everything etc. And yet when we organise weekend breaks together it's me who pays the cottage deposit as I'm the only one who has access to four figures in savings.

I've done some rubbish, low paid jobs in my time and I think I stopped feeling poor when I had a certain amount of savings in the bank- that would cover deposit and advance rent if I had to move, and would feed me for a month or to if I lost my job. Without that security I can't really relax, but others seem able to live without it. Once I had five figures in saving I felt really quite rich.

Teacher2

Actual relative wealth is easy enough to discern. Just Google the figures.

However, the feelings of wealth or poverty are certainly subjective. Many a person on a lower wage in this country feels poor but has riches compared to the poor in, say, village India.

The concept of wealth is tied to needs and wants. Here in a country with a national health service free at the point of use. with free education, with a state funded welfare system and with a generally fair legal system creating a stable society our needs are catered for more or less.

However, we are materialistic and derive our sense of worth by comparing ourselves with others so we can sometimes feel 'poor' when in fact in an objective sense we are perfectly secure financially.

I live in a very rich area and I know people who, if they cannot change their cars to the latest, most expensive model frequently, or live in a huge house or afford school fees or go on several holidays a year would feel they were living modestly.

Personally, I have a tiny income now as I had to retire early from teaching, but I do not feel poor as I live within my means and take pleasure in free and inexpensive things:- my family & frinds, reading, walking and so on.

I guess whether you feel poor or not depends on what sort of personality you are and your outlook on the world. If you are an ungrateful 'glass half empty' sort of person you will always feel 'your nose being rubbed in it' and if you are intelligent, well informed and given to being thankful for your blessings, as long as you have enough to live debt free, you are going to feel fortunate.

A recent wealth survey found that anyone with assets over £500,000 was in the world's top 1%, £50,000 put you in the top 10% and £10,000 put you in the top 50%. That certainly made me feel 'rich'.

Bambywamby

I was on another forum the other day and a youngish female from the USA was in tears whilst on her works computer as she had the most painful UTI that she couldn't afford to get treated. She had no insurance and couldn't afford to see a doctor and pay for a prescription. She was hoping to garner natural cheap or free remedies that could relieve her from the intense pain.
If you have ever had a urine infection, you will appreciate how desperate you can feel with the acute pain and how you would sell your soul to get relief.


For all our complaints about living in the UK today and the NHS being a mess - I for one am incredibly thankful for it. Whether your Richard Branson or Joe Bloggs on benefits you're entitled to use it and be made well by it.


My point being: If you have your health you are very rich as this gives you the ability to work, live, love and experience the world to its full. I am very rich in many ways, I just forget to be grateful about it sometimes.

forzaitalia

If you have a roof over your head, food in the cupboard and a car, then you are not poor. As has been said before most of us in the UK are not poor compared to many millions of people throughout the world.