Disciplinary procedures...Stitch Up!!

Reggie_Rebel

DaveTheMus wrote: »

What's wrong with 3 adults swearing?

One's the Vicar, one's the Verger and the other is the Choir Master

martinthebandit

The correct answer at the start of this sort of disciplinary hearing is to say

'Before we start I would like to unreservedly apologise for any offense I may have inadvertently caused'

You would be surprised how much better they go after that.

bazzyb

DaveTheMus wrote: »

What's wrong with 3 adults swearing?

DaveTheMus wrote: »

I get that if it's a customer facing role, then IMO it's a sackable offence.

we need some context OP

Swearing is generally not seen as acceptable behaviour in many workplaces, regardless of whether customer facing or not.

martinthebandit

bazzyb wrote: »

Swearing is generally not seen as acceptable behaviour anywhere.

Corrected for you, no need to thank me ;-)

wiogs

martinthebandit wrote: »

Corrected for you, no need to thank me ;-)

You appear to have corrected the earlier post in error.

Swearing is acceptable in many workplaces.

Snakey

We used to swear all over the place at work, and that was a firm of accountants. However, if you swore at somebody in any situation other than a bunch of you messing around and having a laugh, you'd have been hauled in no question. And probably the same would have applied if somebody of the "delicate flower" variety had happened to walk past at the wrong time and complained - although in that situation you'd probably all have been on the reciving end of a "quiet word" as a group and told to tone it down.

The trouble with "no I never, and anyone who says I did is a liar, it was them doing it not me" is that everyone has heard it so many times in their life from people who are trying to lie their way out of trouble that it's hard to be believed when it's true.

I wonder if it might be better to just apologise for anything that was said in the heat of the moment and for your part in the argument and the bad feeling that's resulted, and say that you're keen to make peace so that you can all put it behind you (you're not admitting to having sworn, but you're accepting that your behaviour clearly crossed a line), rather than stick to your guns and risk making the boss think that your colleagues are right about you being a difficult person and wonder whether the best solution might be to get rid of you. If these people have all got together and agreed to falsely accuse you, the chances of them admitting they're lying just because someone from HR says "are you sure?" are zero.

One other thing about apologies is that a non-apology makes you look even worse. Don't go with the snarky "I'm sorry if anyone somehow managed to think that I was swearing when I wasn't and got offended for no reason" type stuff. From the boss's perspective (remembering that he is unlikely to believe that everyone's lying to get you into trouble) something must have happened if all these people are making complaints about you.

Hope it gets resolved so that you can at least stay there until you've found another job.

sew109

bazzyb wrote: »

Swearing is generally not seen as acceptable behaviour in many workplaces, regardless of whether customer facing or not.

I have lost count of the number of meetings I have been in where people have sworn seems the norm I'm my industry c word not used but everything else seems fair game

DalePie

otley wrote: »

I have been accused of swearing to one of my colleagues at work.

I did not of course but allegations with the harassed (who has it in for me) has stated I did swear, also 2 witnesses states I swore at him also.

Do what you can to stay in your job now, even if it means apologising.

Once you've ironed everything out, you'll need to put a plan into place to get that person sacked. Could take 3 months, could take 12 months but you'll need to figure an ironclad way of doing it.

The main issue here is that your employment is at risk. Even if you get through this it's still at risk because that guy is always going to be around. I'll probably get flamed for taking this attitude to it but let's face facts, he did it once, he'll most likely take another punt at it.

Btw OP you never mentioned any background to this. Could the guy be jealous? Recent promotion, marriage, children? Is your life looking up at a time when the guys is looking terrible?

Either way if you want to keep this job, you'll need to sort out the underlying reason for this. You either get the guy sacked and well away from being able to harm your employment prospects or you figure out why he's doing it and sort things out that way.
:beer:

suicidebob

DalePie wrote: »

Do what you can to stay in your job now, even if it means apologising.

Once you've ironed everything out, you'll need to put a plan into place to get that person sacked. Could take 3 months, could take 12 months but you'll need to figure an ironclad way of doing it.

The main issue here is that your employment is at risk. Even if you get through this it's still at risk because that guy is always going to be around. I'll probably get flamed for taking this attitude to it but let's face facts, he did it once, he'll most likely take another punt at it.

Btw OP you never mentioned any background to this. Could the guy be jealous? Recent promotion, marriage, children? Is your life looking up at a time when the guys is looking terrible?

Either way if you want to keep this job, you'll need to sort out the underlying reason for this. You either get the guy sacked and well away from being able to harm your employment prospects or you figure out why he's doing it and sort things out that way.
:beer:

Get that person sacked? You're a first class moron.

Southend1

DalePie wrote: »

Do what you can to stay in your job now, even if it means apologising.

Once you've ironed everything out, you'll need to put a plan into place to get that person sacked. Could take 3 months, could take 12 months but you'll need to figure an ironclad way of doing it.

The main issue here is that your employment is at risk. Even if you get through this it's still at risk because that guy is always going to be around. I'll probably get flamed for taking this attitude to it but let's face facts, he did it once, he'll most likely take another punt at it.

Btw OP you never mentioned any background to this. Could the guy be jealous? Recent promotion, marriage, children? Is your life looking up at a time when the guys is looking terrible?

Either way if you want to keep this job, you'll need to sort out the underlying reason for this. You either get the guy sacked and well away from being able to harm your employment prospects or you figure out why he's doing it and sort things out that way.
:beer:

OP please don't follow this advice. It won't end well.