Which choice

cragger89

As someone who has previously suffered a breakdown when everything was "adequate" - meaning; everything was JUST about covered and then something big happened and threw us off course, I would say, get in touch with Step Change now.

Paying just the minimum payments each month will take a long, long time to sort out. You could probably contact the creditors yourself before even involving Step Change and explain the situation as being difficult to manage, and see if they will surrender charges/interest for a period of time to allow you to clear it quicker.

Some creditors dig their heels in, but if you stick to the line that you want to pay back your debt, but things just aren't going to plan at the moment, you'd be surprised how comparatively helpful they are if you say you've considered bankruptcy.

My post is possibly a bit to general, you know yourself if you can manage the payments or not - but I am going to presume because you've posted this query, you are getting towards the point of worrying about debt. Focus on yourself and your immediate family, remaining strong mental health is key - I kidded myself for 2 years that I could sort things and hit the ground far harder than I could ever have envisaged by effectively ignoring the outgoings.

James_B.

glentoran99 wrote: »

im not arguing anything of the sort, Im simply saying its not as easy as you make out to keep to what you agreed

How do you know how hard I find it? How do you think that you know enough about me to know what I can manage, or not?

Are you confusing what I d with what others ought? Can you not understand that I am answering a direct question about what "I" choose to do, not about what others ought to do?

You told the opening poster they should carry on making minimum payments while struggling to live

No, I did not. I did nothing of the sort. I said what I do, not what they should do.

Please, do not invent things that I never wrote.

glentoran99

James_B. wrote: »

How do you know how hard I find it? How do you think that you know enough about me to know what I can manage, or not?

Are you confusing what I d with what others ought? Can you not understand that I am answering a direct question about what "I" choose to do, not about what others ought to do?



No, I did not. I did nothing of the sort. I said what I do, not what they should do.

Please, do not invent things that I never wrote.

generic "you" not you in particular

the poster obviously came here asking for advice but simply worded it "what would you do"? given the whole nature of this forum that was my take anyway,


your very first post passed judgement on those that cant meet obligations but still spend a little on themselves, yet you call me judgemental?

anyway lets stop hijacking the thread and let the poster get advice on how to get out of debt

joedenise

glentoran99 wrote: »

generic "you" not you in particular

the poster obviously came here asking for advice but simply worded it "what would you do"? given the whole nature of this forum that was my take anyway,

your very first post passed judgement on those that cant meet obligations but still spend a little on themselves, yet you call me judgemental?

anyway lets stop hijacking the thread and let the poster get advice on how to get out of debt

Exactly what I was going to come back and say.

I do hope the OP hasn't been put off posting again after reading the "argument" in the interim posts.

Denise

abby1234519

James_B. wrote: »

Yes, without question. If I owed money, I'd go cold, hungry, and unentertained to ensure that I meet my obligations.

I've known people who'll still smoke, still have a drink, and still go out while claiming that they can't pay back what they are supposed to, and genuinely can't understand how someone can think that that is acceptable.

I think you've slightly misunderstood me, I wasn't saying a reason to default would be so you could afford to go to the cinema. I don't do that anyway, I don't buy music or books, I don't drink I don't go out for meals. I get asked out for meals and I say no every single time.

I don't smoke, I don't drink. However I can't afford new clothes for my son. Is that acceptable?

glentoran99

abby1234519 wrote: »

I think you've slightly misunderstood me, I wasn't saying a reason to default would be so you could afford to go to the cinema. I don't do that anyway, I don't buy music or books, I don't drink I don't go out for meals. I get asked out for meals and I say no every single time.

I don't smoke, I don't drink. However I can't afford new clothes for my son. Is that acceptable?

Its quite simply not practical to continue to struggle to meet minimums,

You need to do a proper income and expenditure report, figure out what you need for everything, clothes, food, some entertainment or youll go mad, and then divvy up the rest between your creditors pro-rata

Do not go without basic essentials its simply isnt sustainable

abby1234519

in_need_of_direction wrote: »

Given that things look set to improve in the next year, I'd keep doing what you're doing. Some of those interest rates are ridiculous though. Is there anything you could sell to help tackle simply be! Maybe outgrown children's toys, clothes or equipment. If you could shift that one, I'd give a bit more wriggle room.

Oh I know they are. They hurt me deep inside! I swear I get a a tremor when I look at the interest rate on a statement.

I am currently decluttering the boy's bedroom, we have all of his outgrown clothes vacuum packed in the loft. I will at some point go through them all and try to sell on stuff that perhaps he didn't wear, or where we have multiples of ie coats but as I do intend to have another in the future, I don't really want to get rid of it all because I can clothe another baby without buying anything.

The payments for Simply Be are quite small however, I think £15 a month so I really do not know whether I should focus on that or not. I know its the highest interest though.

in_need_of_direction wrote: »

Also, close vanquis so you aren't tempted to spend on it.

I am closing it once the next statement is generated, its currently in the positive, ie I accidentally put too much on it (£26 extra) so need to see whether there is any residual interest. Not sure what I do if there is still an excess on it. Apart from spend it obviously

bargainbetty wrote: »

Just a thought, but could your OH defer his university hopes for a year and work to get you both back on your feet? Choosing to not work, even when you are studying for a better life is an expensive luxury if your family are having to rob Peter to pay Paul. If he deferred for one year and worked full time in a decent job, you may be able to clear a lot of the high interest debts and refinance the remainder onto low interest cards etc.

To answer your question - I wouldn't drop onto a DMP or struggle by when there was a third option - rearrange my priorities for 12 months to get things sorted.

I know that might seem harsh, I'm sorry, but it really is an option that your and your husband should consider at the end of the current course. One year won't make much difference to the career path at this stage, but it could put you both on a much stronger and more stable footing.

Good luck

He has deferred for a year ie start in 2016. He is currently at college till June (whilst working 24 hours). When he has finished he will try to increase his hours at work if available. If he is unable to then we will have to consider whether he is to go full time or not, I haven't worked it all out yet but basically not going full time in summer would save childcare till September, and then save wraparoundcare fees from September onwards. So it depends on which option is most beneficial. He would definitely work no less than 24 hours

James_B. wrote: »

For as long as it took. I simply cannot conceive of spending money on myself if it means reneging on an agreement that I've made.

I don't spend money on myself. My partner is given money by his mother for haircuts and she buys his shoes. I don't buy new clothes at all. I literally wear my leggings through until they are indecent! And then I just ask for vouchers for Christmas and Birthday

abby1234519

getmore4less wrote: »

Close the vanquis.

Could ask for a deal first no idea if they would be interested.

I think you could put some normal spends on the Tesco card(17.9%) to bring it back up to the max and use the money to tackle the Simply Be(39.99%)

That will save 20% interest and that should be clear fairly quickly.

If you are budgeting for bills in a savings account it might be worth a cash flow analysis to see if you can use the cards as the savings accounts.
This will reduce the interest charges short term till the bill is due.

Even something simple like overpaying the Tesco card with spends money each month and using the card for those spends should save interest.

Going forward without defaulting, focus will need to be on getting debts onto lower rates.

Once a couple of cards are closed it may even be worth trying to get an increase on the limit on one of the lower rates or look for one of the lifetime low rate cards rather than a 0%.

This was something I had been looking at, but its good that someone else has a more developed idea.

I don't think Vanquis do deals so they will be getting closed.

I think you could put some normal spends on the Tesco card(17.9%) to bring it back up to the max and use the money to tackle the Simply Be(39.99%) I thought about this, putting the petrol money on the Lloyds Card and then the Food money on the Tesco Card. And then enough to cover the interest earned that month? It would then still free up £50+ (I have no idea by the way just making it up) to chow down Simply Be. The only issue I have is that I think we would be a lot happier if we could clear debts by order of balance not interest. I know that isn't conducive to snowballing etc however I think it would be a lot less stressful to deal with.

I don't budget for bills in a savings account, I just make sure there is enough money in bills account to cover bills, then when tax credits go in to wages account I move them to groceries and petrol weekly etc.

Bills are on direct debit so I don't think we could use the cards in that way?


I also don't think we can increase the limit on the lower rates, if anything they've already gone up a few times and then remained static. One of them has been coming down (Halifax)


No eligible for good credits cards due to the amount we already have

abby1234519

joedenise wrote: »

Exactly what I was going to come back and say.

I do hope the OP hasn't been put off posting again after reading the "argument" in the interim posts.

Denise

Nah,

To be honest, I wasn't really asking the question to justify if I decided to default. More to justify the struggling on with staying afloat. The circumstances of accumulating the debt are not something I'm going to harp on about, needless to say a lot of it was out of desperation and then a large amount was the usual ignorant spending that we can all be guilty of. Definitely spiraled! I don't take offence to people being outraged at the fact that I have debt and am considering all options. sh*t happens, its how we deal with it. I'll never be put off...

abby1234519

James_B. wrote: »

Are you confusing what I d with what others ought? Can you not understand that I am answering a direct question about what "I" choose to do, not about what others ought to do?

I have to say I do completely get your point of view and I did know what you meant. I personally believe that if you can make it work somehow then slog and pay it off. We aren't quite at the place where we need to consider bankruptcy, I do think we can pull it back by being clever about how we use the existing credit and repayments to clear the higher interest debts as someones mentioned above.

I personally do NOT want to default because I will be back to where I was in 2009 and those are just about to start dropping off my file. I want to break that cycle!

However I also don't want to metaphorically kill myself doing it, I can suffer from anxiety quite badly so its making sure the path I take is one I can commit to.