Outdoors? Plus, budget ><

Petlamb

Hi folks... very newly engaged and while I know there's plenty of time to do everything - we haven't set a date yet - I'm trying to do some initial scoping out of basics.

A biggie, of course, is venue. Perfect world, we'd love something like some woodland as we're both quite spiritual and love nature, but I understand that's not possible in England - though I've noticed some suggestions it is in certain circumstances in Scotland?

Failing that, I know it's an option to do the legal bit in a registry office and the ceremonial stuff outdoors, but I guess I'm just worried that might feel a bit disconnected?

The other big worry I have is money. We haven't worked out a budget yet - like I say, it's very early days and my parents are going to be discussing the matter (NOT something I asked for I feel I should state) - but I want to do it as affordably as possible. We're not planning to go the whole white wedding princess malarky, but I'd like the occasion to feel special, you know? With that in mind, does anyone have any resources or suggestions I should look at?

Sorry for the rambling post and thanks in advance! :money:

daivid

The legal ceremony must take place in a registered permenant structure, some are more substantial than others - many hotels now seem to have a summerhouse in the gardens registered so there may be woodland venues with a similar arrangement.
Alternatively you may choose to marry in the registry office a day or two prior, then have a blessing on the day of your gathering which can be wherever you want and presided over by anyone though has no legal basis. This option does seem to be gaining in popularity though is not for all.

fannyadams

"Pippilongstocking" got married in "sctochland" in a forest. IIRC she had a humanist ceremony and it was beautiful.
"wik" went and took pictures I think, looked amazing.
shame I can't 'tag' them in this post.

74jax

We did the formal part in a hotel by the beach, then did everything else and had the party on the beach.

gayleygoo

Friends of ours recently got married in a campsite - under an arch they'd put up, outside! The registrar actually came out to do the ceremony once the couple had got the place registered, and it all went fine. Once the registrar had left, they had a handfasting ceremony the way they wanted it was really lovely!

Another wedding I went to a few years ago had the reception in a local forest. I don't think it was cheap to get the marquees, caterers, dance floor, loos and everything else all set up there, but again it was an amazing setting and you could probably do something similar on a budget if you've got people to help out etc. Legally you'd probably have to do a registry office ceremony first, but I know quite a few people who do this just in their jeans and t-shirts and see it as just the legal part and do the "wedding" the way they want to later on.

Petlamb

Thanks for the info and stories guys, all really helpful. We're still pondering which way to go though I am thinking that chances are we'll end up going the "legal bit indoors" way.

xx

heartbreak_star

Two friends of mine recently tied the knot, did legal bit the day before (which they described as "signing the papers") and their own vow exchange ceremony and reception at a campsite (which they described as "the wedding").

I wondered if it might feel disconnected, but they said that thinking of the legalities as just signing the papers to make way for the real wedding really helped.

Congratulations on your engagement

HBS x

Petlamb

I like that logic, and it's reassuring me somewhat about the idea of separate legalities and ceremony. Lots to think about!

Faith177

We got married in Scotland outside at Urquhart Castle in a humanist ceremony as neither of us are the remotest bit religious and I'm so glad we did as it was amazing and extremley personal to us.

As it was in Scotland we only had to have the one ceremony as Humanist marriages are legal over the border :T

A few of our friends have since had humanist weddings down here. One went to the registry office a few days before to do the legal stuff. One had the legal stuff followed by the humanist ceremony. This made the ceremony very long IMOH also the legal part felt very just thrown in and standard compared to the second part but each to their own

Congratulations on your engagement x

When_the_going_gets_tough

Remember the rain!! Beautiful outdoor settings lose their shine when everything is dripping and sodden!

Evil_Olive

Congratulations! :T

We had a pagan handfasting outdoors with the reception etc afterwards on a Saturday, followed by the legal bit in our local registry office a few days later. We thought of the handfasting as the 'wedding' right from the start. The legal bit, for us, was just the equivalent of popping into the vestry afterwards to sign the register which is why we did it after the wedding, not before - also, I didn't want to be 'legally' married before I was 'actually' married as it were.

All the guests were invited to the wedding and reception on the Saturday. At the registry office on the following Tuesday it was just us and both sets of parents so there was no 'disjointedness' at all. I've lost count of the number of people who've got in touch to say it was one of the best weddings they'd ever been to, so it seems the guests didn't think so either

We saved a heck of a lot of money doing it this way as we didn't have to pay over the odds to get a 'registered' venue - we just used a local village hall with an attached meadow which cost us £150 for the whole day (Pagan priests don't usually charge unless they have to travel far, though we did give him £50 for expenses/tip ) The basic registry office bit only cost £45.

We had an arch, and a gazebo decorated with leaves and flowers, plus there was a beautiful mature willow tree and other trees around the edge of the meadow which provided a nice backdrop for photos.

Having the village hall as well as the meadow also gave us a contingency space for the ceremony in case of rain and access to toilets, parking and kitchen/bar facilities at no extra cost or effort.

Hope this helps