How worried are you about your debt?

StressedSteph

Great thread.


Back in December 2013 when I had my third and FINAL LBM, I wasn't sleeping, I was hiding 20k debt from my hubby and I was snowed under with minimum repayments of 1k per month and a maxed out overdraft.

Life was very depressing. As soon as hubbys money went into the bank, we were still chest deep in the overdraft, so it never felt like we were getting anywhere.

Overdraft and bank interest charges were taking money that should have been going towards the debt repayments and we were in a vicious circle of debt.

As usual the wonderful people on DFW boards helped me work my way into gaining some control.

I switched banks and started treating my overdraft like a regular debt. You cannot imagine the psychological difference to put the wages in the bank and actually be in CREDIT. It was a very new feeling to me and a nice one.

Since then I have found YNAB (You Need A Budget) which has change my way of budgeting forever.

Instead of just recording my spending in an Excel sheet, which is basically just a copy of my bank statement, YNAB forces you to "Give every dollar a job" when the wage comes in.

So in essence you allocate your wages to your upcoming bills that week and ONLY then do you see if there is any money to live on afterwards. Obviously at the moment any spare money goes towards debt repayments, but eventually YNAB will show me how much we have left over the save or spend how we like.

YNAB teaches you to check the budget to see what you have available to spend rather than the bank balance. Amazing.

Since last December we have paid off very nearly half of the debt. By the end of next year will should hopefully be debt free.

Just got to hope for a smooth uneventful year, but whatever happens, we have sworn off debt for life. We will never again reach for the credit card to solve a problem, because it just creates more problems for the future.

We are currently living half a life at the moment so that we can actually have a life once the debt is gone.

I will never forget the utter despair I felt at my LBM and refuse to ever feel like that again.

moohound

I have been debt free for over a year now, but I still have the fear that I will go off the rails and run up debts again.

I am grateful for my trashed credit rating as it makes it almost impossible.

If i hadn't have run up those debts we could have been mortgage free by now with £25K in the bank, I feel a lot of guilt about this still.


I have a compulsive/impulsive/dependant part of my personality and I can get addicted and obsessed with things easily, this is one reason why I rarely drink and never gamble, I once put my whole wages (a princely £30 this was 25 years ago!) in the pub fruit machine when I was a student working in a bar, leaving myself no money for the week, and I realised it would be a slippery slope for me, and could never have a go on these machines just for fun, it was all or nothing. Likewise I don't play video games because if I did nothing else would get done.

I think different types of obsessive and compulsive behaviour are more similar than you would maybe think, whether it is drinking, gambling or compulsive spending and debting.

Having insight and understanding your problem behaviours helps but it doesn't always stop you from doing it.

Mutual support is the biggest help I think, from things like this site.

xx

chasingfreedom

Great thread!

I have very bad days where I feel very low and depressed about it all and not so bad days but I am constantly worrying about bills and money. We both earn a reasonable salary and between us generally bring in minimum 3k a month but generally each month I get paid on the 24th and by about the 1st I have nothing left. (I make sure I pay all bills as soon as the money arrives and do my 'big' food shop) I then spend 3 weeks of the month with no money to do anything, buy anything and having to transfer money now and then from my husbands weekly wage to keep me going, put petrol in the car etc (that's if he has it, he's struggling as much as me)


There is light at the end of the tunnel though for us. My biggest debt finishes in June 2015 (woo hoo!!) but its been almost 7 years and doesn't seem at the moment like it'll ever end. It will relieve a massive amount of pressure and mean I can actually start trying to clear other bills. Times are hard now but by June next year I will be 318 per month better off from my loan and should have cleared my Next account (which is 90 at the moment) so it'll be like having a huge payrise!! It also means I will have almost 500 more a month to blast all other bills. I did a snowball calculator and most of our smaller bills will be gone within 18 months. Just my husbands loan which will take longer for us to clear but will be another 396 a month once it is gone!!

I try not to worry too much but I hate that I can't take my kids out, go shopping if I feel like it, or have a day out but I know its my/our own doing. We were very silly and living above our means at a time when our income wasn't so good and we had small children. Catalogues are the work of the devil!!!! Now we are paying for it. Lesson learnt!! Once we are clear we will never need credit, other than mortgage and we have no intention of buying anything on credit again!!

clara75

I'm very stressed about debt. Partly it's because I've became single last year and went from a comfortable 2-earner household income to single parent income. Ex does pay child maintenance but of course it's not the same thing. Also, my mortgage is higher than I would like it to be and on the top of that I have about £6000 credit card debt that's only slowly reducing - which is why I joined this forum. I'm trying to be a bit more disciplined about finances and hopefully once I pay the credit card debt I should feel less stressed. It's sitting at 0% for another two years so at least I'm not paying interest. My credit history is spotless and I guess one could argue that I'm doing a decent job at managing finances but I want to feel more secure. And ideally start overpaying the mortgage.

lolls89

I'm very worried about it. I very rarely get a good nights sleep over it.
I feel horrendously guilty and frustrated that I don't have an income to help my partner pay the debt off.
We have so many loans/ CC/ OD and absolutely nothing to show for it apart from debt.
I'm worried as well that when/if we eventually get out of debt we end up back in to it.

This site and especially this part of the forum has helped me a lot. Seeing that people in worse positions than ourselves have managed to get a grip of their finances and the support, advice and encouragement from other members.

catshark88

gabriel1980 wrote: »

At most I would be mildly concerned. I never have a sleepless night over it. I suppose in Scotland I'm a lot more protected from baliffs and other extreme debt collection services. I've been lucky in that I ignore debt collectors enough that they just go away and the debt gets forgotten about. When you borrow money without intending to pay it back, that relieves a lot of the worry.

How admirable....

blisteringblue

Can't say I was ever mega worried about it, was a shock when this ostrich removed his head from the sand and it was over 60K.

However another with a DMP and it will be done in another 48 payments.

That's less time than my last loan, no point worrying about that

Flutterby83

I didn't used to worry about debt until the bank kept my card when I tried to take my child benefit out 9 years ago, my (now ex) husband had taken out loan after loan, cc after cc, an overdraft store cards etc and now we couldn't pay them. 2 years after going into an IVA, we split, I paid my half of the IVA off a year early (I believe they're still chasing him for his half!!) and vowed never to get into debt again......until I was offered a 'credit building' credit card, cue the avalanche and you got it! My lbm came when I had an overdraft, 2 cc's, 2 catalogue accounts and a loan totalling about 8k and I've realised before it got out of hand. My overdraft and both catalogues are now paid off, one cc gets cleared in 2 weeks and I will then snowball until everything is clear.
I pretty much think about, but not worry about, it every day as it does affect everything - how do I reduce the food shopping more? Do I really need to buy this? Can I stretch this out a bit more? But it will always go to the ultimate goal of being debt free so I can then be mortgage free and won't have to think about it

saraih

I worried constantly when I first found out what a mess we were in, it looked insurmountable. It got better when the priority debts were sorted and then much better when the risk of ccj action passed.

The biggest worry was making sure my son wasn't suffering financially due to our mishandling of various situations. Now my biggest worry is saving enough to get through another disaster without borrowing.

It does bother me but everything I do to save money or stretch the budget makes it easier to deal with. Spending money on non-essentials that aren't related to my son can make me feel quite sick though.

Swampy3k

it varies for me, I go from totally in control of it/ plans of action etc. to sleepless nights (usually nearer the end of the month when the funds run low) and debt just seems to stagnate.. for myself I get paid monthly, so while I can make payments at the start of the month, it tends to be one off payments unlike those on here who seem to be able to make changes to it daily! grr...