Advice and Guidance

SOMam

I am currently on a self-managed DMP which to me was terrifying for a few months until I saw that the letters dried up and I wasn't being called constantly anymore. Also, seeing the balances of my debts decreasing each month even if it is only by a few £'s helps remind me that I did the right thing by working with my creditors instead of trying to hide from them. My DMP is expected to run for around 2 and a half years, however I am working towards being debt free a lot sooner if I can by using what I have learned on this forum (an extra payment a month, strict budgeting, being frugal, etc)

As for "am I doing the right thing?" Yes, you definitely are! You are paying towards your debts without accumulating more (regardless of how little you pay towards them).

Well done on the steps you have already taken towards your gambling. Use the fact that you are taking control of your finances to empower yourself against any gambling urges you may get. I am an insanely impulsive shopper and reminding myself that I am in charge of my money helps me to say no to that item that I have no need for whatsoever.

Good luck on your journey to becoming debt free!

Mam x

wannabedebtfree2016

What I think I am going to do is use SC for a while, maybe get a few of the smaller PDL's paid off then when my list of creditors is lower I might then consider self managed DMP.

Spoke to Everyday loans today on the phone as they had the wrong contact number for me .... when I signed up to the agreement they wanted numbers for 3 other people in case they cannot contact me (which I don't want others to be contacted where possible) .... Anyway, I said i got myself into a bit of a pickle and will be commencing DMP, they have advised me to go into their branch as they may have other options....Just to be clear, if they offer me another loan to consolidate that would be a bad idea to do it wouldn't it?!?!

That may sound crazy but what would be tempting for me is that it would have all of my creditors paid off (which must look good with CRA's surely) ..... I don't have any experience with dealing with debt so thoughts would be very much appreciated on this?

Thanks

Sickofthisdebt

It's scary starting a DMP especially when you are doing it alone. I feel sick a lot of the time and wonder if I am doing the right thing but I don't have a choice. I want to be debt free and this is the only way. I can totally understand how you are feeling. I think most people on a DMP can. What I found really helpful was to go back and read a number of the DMP mutual support threads and some of the Debt Free Diaries, you'll see a lot of the people have the same worries and are wondering if they are doing the right thing at the beginning of the process.

I really wouldn't go for a consolidation loan. I did in the past and ended up in a bigger pickle :eek:

DawnW

Please, please don't do /sign up for anything before talking to Stepchange. A PDL company will only help themselves, not you. Nobody can make your debt go away unfortunately, but a properly administered DMP will enable affordable payments and ensure that you have enough money to live on. A consolidation loan at (no doubt) high interest will not, and what is more there is a risk that you might run up more debt. This is not a criticism aimed personally at you - many, many others on this board have made this mistake and had to deal with the consequences. You are dealing with a lot at the moment, given your gambling issues. Let Stepchange help you properly with the debt.

Take care x

wannabedebtfree2016

Thanks, yes it makes sense really. It's just tempting to prevent defaults as looking at going onto the mortgage in 6 years but could be delayed with receiving defaults which is ultimately going to happen on a DMP.

Having said that , I have gotten myself into this mess so I guess I'll have to deal with the consequences. I know it sounded crazy but sometimes just opinions and experiences of others help find clarity.

This is such an amazing site and your all amazing people wish if have found this sooner ��

fatbelly

wannabedebtfree2016 wrote: »

What I think I am going to do is use SC for a while, maybe get a few of the smaller PDL's paid off then when my list of creditors is lower I might then consider self managed DMP.

Stepchange will treat everyone proportionately and will want to deal with all your debts so you won't get smaller debts paid off ahead of larger ones.

If they are recommending a dmp then defaults go with the territory I am afraid. But they do drop off after 6 years.

wannabedebtfree2016

fatbelly wrote: »

Stepchange will treat everyone proportionately and will want to deal with all your debts so you won't get smaller debts paid off ahead of larger ones.

If they are recommending a dmp then defaults go with the territory I am afraid. But they do drop off after 6 years.

Thanks, I know they pay creditors equal amounts. What I meant was a couple of the £120 - £150 PDL debts will be paid after about 6 months or so. Thinking about it though if it works well with SC then maybe I should just leave it all to them until I am DF.

Sometimes it feels like I should deal with my mess myself rather than let someone else deal with it but then I guess that is what SC are there for.

SOMam

wannabedebtfree2016 wrote: »

Sometimes it feels like I should deal with my mess myself rather than let someone else deal with it but then I guess that is what SC are there for.

Sometimes it is not as simple as "dealing with your own mess". Everyone needs help at one time or another and you should never feel bad by asking for help because you are struggling but I do understand where your feelings are coming from.

Try to see it in a different light...Your DMP provider is taking some of the strain to allow you some breathing space and this enables you to focus more on how to handle your finances instead of focusing on making a decision between a debt repayment you possibly can not afford or feeding yourself any any dependents you have.

I chose to self manage my DMP as my debt is very small and with a very small number of creditors otherwise I would have turned to StepChange to manage it on my behalf. I would never have managed dealing with 5+ creditors and £5+ of debt (just an example)...I just don't have that ability while trying to manage my own mental health. (I wouldn't have even managed to deal with the debts I have if it wasn't for these forums for which I couldn't be more thankful)

I can assure you after a few months on a DMP you will feel better. Remember it is only someone paying out YOUR money on YOUR behalf and dealing with the letters demanding payments and making threats. You are still providing the money to be able to do that. You are not passing the buck...You are just accessing a system that millions of other people are using in order to help dig themselves out of debt.

Hope you are well

Mam x

fatbelly

wannabedebtfree2016 wrote: »

Thanks, I know they pay creditors equal amounts. What I meant was a couple of the £120 - £150 PDL debts will be paid after about 6 months or so. Thinking about it though if it works well with SC then maybe I should just leave it all to them until I am DF.

Classically, a debt management plan pays off creditors proportionally. So if you had debts of £100, £200 and £300, and £60 per month available then the creditors would get £10, £20 and £30 respectively so everything clears at the same time in 10 months time.

Now, having said that, Stepchange are a bit different as they look at the contractual payment. But anyway, I think you're right that you should choose a strategy and stick with it while it's working.

wannabedebtfree2016

SOMam wrote: »

Sometimes it is not as simple as "dealing with your own mess". Everyone needs help at one time or another and you should never feel bad by asking for help because you are struggling but I do understand where your feelings are coming from.

Try to see it in a different light...Your DMP provider is taking some of the strain to allow you some breathing space and this enables you to focus more on how to handle your finances instead of focusing on making a decision between a debt repayment you possibly can not afford or feeding yourself any any dependents you have.

I chose to self manage my DMP as my debt is very small and with a very small number of creditors otherwise I would have turned to StepChange to manage it on my behalf. I would never have managed dealing with 5+ creditors and £5+ of debt (just an example)...I just don't have that ability while trying to manage my own mental health. (I wouldn't have even managed to deal with the debts I have if it wasn't for these forums for which I couldn't be more thankful)

I can assure you after a few months on a DMP you will feel better. Remember it is only someone paying out YOUR money on YOUR behalf and dealing with the letters demanding payments and making threats. You are still providing the money to be able to do that. You are not passing the buck...You are just accessing a system that millions of other people are using in order to help dig themselves out of debt.

Hope you are well

Mam x

Thanks Mam!

Yes, it's just all these horrible feelings, hopefully it will all quieten down soon once everything is in place and payments commence.

The other day I was at work, looked at my phone and there was 22 missed calls, 5 voicemail, 10 email and around a dozen text messages (some of which were spam) and I just thought how the hell did I get to this. I work in a bank and tell people on a daily basis what PDL can do to their finances and have helped lots of people over the years become debt free yet I still can't take my own advice.

all of this stemmed from one lie to my partner and family to cover up gambling and because of that lie and the inability to afford things for our new home I got a PDL. We all know how it goes, you pay it back with interest, you then can't afford things next month so you get another one at higher value, and so on. To top things off overtime stopped in the meantime so I lost £500 p/m which after a year you start to get used to (again, another silly attitude)

..."oh what a tangled web we weave...."

On the plus side, the MSE forums and you lot have definitely managed to save what remained of my sanity. Sometimes just someone to listen to you rant rant without judging is enough to get you through :)

Thanks

Wannabe x