Cannot afford to pay all our bills, what are the options?

BillJones

Pollycat wrote: »

I don't know if you've read the posts that led to the comment you've quoted but A_Couple_In_Love had advised the OP not to take any loans out if he couldn't afford it.

Yes, very useful advice, especially when someone seems to have taken out a loan for a sofa.

You seem to think that its not worth saying, but please don't try to stop people posting who disagree with you.

BillJones

glasgowsaver2011 wrote: »

I suspect the idea of working has scared the OP away

I hope not, but it does seem to happen a lot.

Some people are willing to do "anything, absolutely anything", except give up their smartphone, stop going out, cancel a holiday, find work...

Pollycat

BillJones wrote: »

Yes, very useful advice, especially when someone seems to have taken out a loan for a sofa.

You seem to think that its not worth saying, but please don't try to stop people posting who disagree with you.

:wall: :wall: :wall:

It would have been very useful advice if the OP had originally posted:
'I've lost my job but am considering taking out a loan to buy a sofa. Is this a good idea?'

However, he didn't ask that.

He took the loan out when he was working, when he could afford the repayments.

I'm sure that if he had a crystal ball, he'd not have taken the loan out in the first place.

I'm sure that he now wishes he hadn't taken out the loan.

So pointing out that he shouldn't take any loans out if he can't afford them is pretty poor advice.
Akin to locking the stable door after the horse has bolted, really.

I'm not disputing that not taking loans out if you can't afford them or if your job future is 'iffy' is useful advice generally, but I'm sure the OP didn't want general advice.

He wanted advice tailored to his specific situation - and A_Couple_in_Love didn't provide that advice.

sourcrates

With regard to everyone saying the OP should get an evening job while the OH looks after the childcare.
Unsure as to where the OP lives, so I can only comment on the job situation in my area, most advertised jobs have between 150-250 applicants, on average, so your chances of actually getting to the interview stage are quiet slim to begin with, I'm sure this doesn't apply to every job, but from what I am told, its quiet commonplace here.
So in theory, yes, good advice, however, in reality, its much more difficult, I must add I live in a rural farming area, not in a large town or city.

mrsd1984

sourcrates wrote: »

With regard to everyone saying the OP should get an evening job while the OH looks after the childcare.
Unsure as to where the OP lives, so I can only comment on the job situation in my area, most advertised jobs have between 150-250 applicants, on average, so your chances of actually getting to the interview stage are quiet slim to begin with, I'm sure this doesn't apply to every job, but from what I am told, its quiet commonplace here.
So in theory, yes, good advice, however, in reality, its much more difficult, I must add I live in a rural farming area, not in a large town or city.

It may be difficult, but not impossible. OP could get some CV's printed out and hand them out in pubs/bars/restaurants/fast food outlets etc. Getting a job can be difficult, but only impossible if the person looking decides that they want a job, but won't do certain jobs, will only work for a certain pay, etc etc. OP has mentioned that working is difficult due to childcare, but when evening work has been mentioned I haven't noticed a response.

ChopinonaBudget

I suspect the idea of looking after a 15 month old from what is probably 8-6.30pm then it being assumed OP has the energy to go out and stack shelves in the evening may have been what scared him away.
I found it difficult enough being a SAHM with a young toddler. By 6pm I was quite literally ready to drop. On the nights I had to work (until 3am sometimes) I was so exhausted the next few days I wasn't even functioning. To this day, have no idea how I got through that first year.
Evening work may just not be an option.

sourcrates

ChopinonaBudget wrote: »

I suspect the idea of looking after a 15 month old from what is probably 8-6.30pm then it being assumed OP has the energy to go out and stack shelves in the evening may have been what scared him away.
I found it difficult enough being a SAHM with a young toddler. By 6pm I was quite literally ready to drop. On the nights I had to work (until 3am sometimes) I was so exhausted the next few days I wasn't even functioning. To this day, have no idea how I got through that first year.
Evening work may just not be an option.

Ha !!! you have hit the nail right on the head.


I have a 12 year old, who, to be fair, pretty much looks after herself, I also have a 5 year old girl, and a 4 year old autistic boy, who I have to watch every single minute, I have them 2 days a week, and after a 10 hr day with them, when not at school, I'm only fit for the armchair !!!!


From washing up, cooking, cleaning up after them, changing nappies, wiping bums, stopping the boy from wrecking the house, changing telly channels, closing doors, opening doors, dad this, dad that, "can I have this ?" "can I have that" 50 times a minute, keeping him out of the fish tank, knocking the telly over, in and out of the garden, climbing the curtains, he can get from one end of the room to the other, without setting foot on the ground !!!!


Then me go out to work ??? phfft !!!

ChopinonaBudget

You have your hands full, Sourcrates!!! I teach a good few kids with ASD so I've got a good idea of what you're talking about!

Am I the only one wondering if OP would be given such a hard time finding a evening job if he were a she? I've not seen SAHMs being told to get evening jobs on this board before... Mostly just to find survey work or eBay stuff etc.

mrsd1984

I agree that it's not easy. I work some evenings, sometimes after being home all day with my ds, other days after working all day, spending time with my son and then working again once he is in bed. It is definitely not easy, but we need to do it so that we can clear debts. DH works full time and is currently looking out for work a couple of evenings a week delivering food for a supermarket or something similar.

If circumstances were different I'm not sure I'd be able to do is, as a previous poster stated, but with one toddler it is do-able. Difficult, I won't dispute, but definitely possible.

sourcrates

ChopinonaBudget wrote: »

You have your hands full, Sourcrates!!! I teach a good few kids with ASD so I've got a good idea of what you're talking about!

Am I the only one wondering if OP would be given such a hard time finding a evening job if he were a she? I've not seen SAHMs being told to get evening jobs on this board before... Mostly just to find survey work or eBay stuff etc.

I think a lot of people give advice, in good faith, but of the "one size fits all variety".
I work shifts 3 days a week, and have the kids the other two days.
My wife and myself are separated, but we still share the childcare, mind you my life will become easier after September as my boy will be at school full time, they are very good at handing him there, very strict with them lol, he doesn't like it !!!!!
Really, we don't know that much about the OP`s home life, and we don't all fit into niche brackets, there are often other factors to consider.