Best way to use this money

lizzy23

getmeouttahere wrote: »

because even when the interest free period ends, it's very low interest compared to any card I'm likely to ever get in the future (15.9%) plus they are the bank I bank with so don't really want to upset them.

they won't be quiet as loyal to you,,, see my edit above,, i really don't think you have accepted how deep in the do do you are,, you asked all these questions at the beginning of July and got the same answers, you can't sustain these payments,, you're credit rating is probably trashed already, and will definitely be trashed once you send your token payments,,, But you really have no option,

Tixy

To have the best chance of your creditors agreeing to freeze interest you need to demonstrate that you are treating all creditors fairly.

Keeping up with payments on one card and defaulting on all the others could mean creditors are less likely to agree to freeze interest.

Once you have spoken to a debt advice charity they will talk through your options and implications.

National_Debtline

getmeouttahere wrote: »

Thanks lizzy. I'm just so upset with myself for letting this happen. I got into debt before when I was 18 and I swore I would never let it happen again. This time I have dragged my wife down with me and all so we could do work to the house that we couldn't really afford. I just wish we hadn't bothered.

Maybe I should just give up.

Hi again

There is nothing you've said here that in my time as a debt adviser I haven't already come across and been able to work through. Please do get in touch with one of the free advice agencies, whether it be Stepchange, National Debtline or another. It will be time well spent.

As cliched as it sounds, a problem shared = a problem halved.

Regards

Dennis
Twitter: @natdebtline

getmeouttahere

Thanks for all the posts and thoughts. They have given me a lot to think about.

lizzy23 wrote: »

they won't be quiet as loyal to you,,, see my edit above,, i really don't think you have accepted how deep in the do do you are,, you asked all these questions at the beginning of July and got the same answers, you can't sustain these payments,, you're credit rating is probably trashed already, and will definitely be trashed once you send your token payments,,, But you really have no option,

Believe me lizzy, I have accepted how deep we are in, but it doesn't stop me wanting to try and climb my way out of it. Our credit ratings to date are good. I only have one missed payment for Woolworths (which was paid 4 days late) but other than that we have so far maintained payments, but I have accepted this can't continue and that's why I am here.

Tixy wrote: »

To have the best chance of your creditors agreeing to freeze interest you need to demonstrate that you are treating all creditors fairly.

Keeping up with payments on one card and defaulting on all the others could mean creditors are less likely to agree to freeze interest.

Once you have spoken to a debt advice charity they will talk through your options and implications.

Thanks. I will try and get a callback from StepChange to discuss my options. One thing I could do is pay off the Nationwide card in full but as I said, I will talk to StepChange.

National_Debtline wrote: »

Hi again

There is nothing you've said here that in my time as a debt adviser I haven't already come across and been able to work through. Please do get in touch with one of the free advice agencies, whether it be Stepchange, National Debtline or another. It will be time well spent.

As cliched as it sounds, a problem shared = a problem halved.

Regards

Dennis
Twitter: @natdebtline

Thanks, will do.

LeaLea89

getmeouttahere, please remember you are not alone in this, the debt charities will help and everyone on this forum is here to give advice from experience etc. Personally i would either speak with one of the debt charities or give the Citizens Advice Bureau a call for some advice. Sorry for not having any further help for you but sometimes just to know someone is there in these situations can be a big lift.

ratrace

Hi

Dont give up hope we all make mistakes, thats what makes us human

Talk to step change and see what sort of help is out there

GettingOrganised

Would your mother be happy if you used the money she is giving you for a different purpose? If you do use it towards your debts, I would seriously consider discussing this with her first - it isn't worth jeopardising your relationship with her.

The situation you have found yourself in has happened recently and will take some time to come to terms with. However, you need to take action as soon as possible. The longer you take trying to do the right thing (in your opinion) and hoping it will solve itself, you're just delaying the inevitable.

Honestly, the sooner you do something to address this, the better - you will have more money to actually live on now and you will sleep better at night (speaking from experience here). Hopefully, your situation will improve in the near future and you can resume the payments you were making.

Good luck on your debt free journey, remember we're all in very similar situations and were here to support each other.

theoretica

Using this money for your debts would leave you in a financial situation which is still very hard, so you would have used £5k of your mother's money and not made any real change for the better. And as said, she gave it to you for a purpose and I think morally any other use should be discussed with her, and it might be of greater benefit later.

Could you take in a lodger to up your income?

Where is the money now? If it is in one of your accounts make sure it is safe before you default on debts.

harveybobbles

Use the £5000 to buy lottery tickets?

On a serious note, StepChange is the way to go.

After you have cancelled all DD's

catriona79

getmeouttahere wrote: »

Thanks for all the posts and thoughts. They have given me a lot to think about.



Believe me lizzy, I have accepted how deep we are in, but it doesn't stop me wanting to try and climb my way out of it. Our credit ratings to date are good. I only have one missed payment for Woolworths (which was paid 4 days late) but other than that we have so far maintained payments, but I have accepted this can't continue and that's why I am here.




Thanks. I will try and get a callback from StepChange to discuss my options. One thing I could do is pay off the Nationwide card in full but as I said, I will talk to StepChange.


Thanks, will do.

Hello,

I read all your threads this morning and wanted to offer some support. I understand that you wanted to make your house comfortable and got into debt. I did a similar thing, only solo.

Firstly, if you and your wife can both do web design, and you can go out there and bring business in, then in theory your wife's disability will not matter as far as work is concerned, which is really good news.

Secondly though, I really don't think that you've absorbed the essence of what people are saying to you.
There is no "slightest chance of you getting out of this hole". I think you are still hoping there is, and this will make you take the wrong decisions, which will only prolong the time you're going to spend in DMP. If you use the £5k to pay a debt now, you'll deny yourself a chance to get a settlement at a later date, possibly at 50% of the total value of the debt too.

The longer you delay admitting to yourself how bad the situation is, the more years of your life you will spend paying off your debt.

In real terms this is going to mean more years of living on minimum and being in the red, more years of denying yourself life's little joys and possibly putting off decision,such as family planning (if that's what you want to do). You get my gist. You need to act now, not to make it even worse in the future.

Quotes like this makes me think you have not understood that your options are limited:

getmeouttahere wrote: »

because even when the interest free period ends, it's very low interest compared to any card I'm likely to ever get in the future (15.9%) plus they are the bank I bank with so don't really want to upset them.

Plus, you are still trying to maintain a good credit record - I just do not understand what this is for? Are you intending to borrow more? Realistically, you can't afford it...
Unfortunately psychologically it's not nice not to have access to credit, especially as our society works that way... but the premise of credit is that you pay it back, and you just are not able to do it at the moment and there is nothing in place that says you will be able to, in a v short space of time.

I would advise that you stop thinking about your credit rating. Give your mum her money back, ask for it later in the day. If you're in DMP and when your car finance ends, you may need a cheap runaround car, which you may want to use £1k of the money for, in order for you to be able to bring business in. Unless you live in a big city with decent transport links.

At the end of the day, you need to remember that for every month you refuse to admit that you have no options but to default, you will spend many more months paying it all back. Please think about it and do not make it harder for yourself and your wife in the future.