Childcare payment as maintenance?

tandl165

Hi all,

I have an informal arrangement (no CSA involvement) with my ex whereby I pay £37/week maintenance directly to her based on the 3 nights/week I look after my son, which I calculated using the CSA maintenance calculator. In addition to this I also pay £243/month using childcare vouchers to cover half of his nursery fees.

I'm finding this level of outgoing unsustainable, but want the best for my son still. The childcare is something we both benefit from as we both work full time.

As the childcare cost (£243/month) is above the level of statutory maintenance anyway (4 x £37 = £148/month), would it be reasonable to continue to pay my half of this, but not any extra?

It is obviously a considerable outgoing to pay all of this, and I'm struggling somewhat. I have him 3 nights a week anyway, so she doesn't have a great deal more costs than me for him, and she is also in receipt of child benefit. I would just like to have a fair arrangement.

Thanks.

Caz3121

If the CSA were involved they would not consider what you are proposing as in lieu of maintenance - you could stop the childcare and continue with the maintenance and there is nothing they could do but as you have your son half the week and need the childcare too this may be detrimental to yourself

does your ex claim tax credits and get help with the childcare costs?

how long before your son qualifies for free hours at nursery?

tandl165

It seems a bit of a grey area to me, as surely maintenance is designed to pay for things like childcare?

Ex uses childcare vouchers too, so can't claim tax credits. Also earns quite a bit, so no other help that I know of. he does get 15 hours free a week now, but even so a full-time nursery place is £500/month.

I do need the childcare too, so can't really reasonably justify stopping paying that. Hmm, tricky.

HoneyNutLoop

Yes it is a tricky one, as it's very unlikely if you simply stopped paying the child maintenance that your ex would go "oh OK" and everything would carry on as normal. There will be consequences to your decision. The best advice, as this is a non CSA/CMS case, is to talk to your ex about your current arrangement, to see if you can amicably work out some changes.

Some possible thoughts, to give you a devils advocate point of view.

She may consider it unfair that your only contribution to your son's upbringing outside of the time he spends with you, is to pay for the childcare that you need in order to work and nothing else. The reduced calculation for child maintenance is to reflect the fact that you are incurring costs during the time you are caring your son. If that includes your childcare needs, than so be it. She appears to be paying for the childcare costs she is incurring for the time she has care of your son, so it would seem fair that you should pay for it for the time you are providing care.

You say she doesn't have a great deal more costs than you for your son, due to the 3/4 nights split. Analyse that position more to work out if your £37 a week contribution is fair. How much do you each spend on your son for the following things:
Clothes
Food
Toiletries/personal hygiene related products
Toys
Parties
Social activities
Books
Equipment
Furniture, etc.

Do you go halves on everything he needs, or does one of you incur the lions share? If he's sick, who takes the day off - is this done evenly?

It is difficult if you are struggling financially, so you need to look at the rest of your finances too. It may be that your child maintenance contribution is a fair proportion of your sons costs, in which case you may need help reducing other areas of expenditure. Thankfully, this forum (not this particular sub-board) is great at looking at peoples finances and seeing where savings can be made, so maybe bear that in mind as a thought to consider?

FBaby

I agree with HNL, I wouldn't cut down on the amount your pay as it could go against you, but it would be reasonable to expect you ex to pay for all or at least most of the things your child only needs one off. Shoes, coats, activities, lunches, birthday parties/presents etc.... Would your ex be arrangeable to this?