feel ashamed by our debt level

midlander81

Hi I posted earlier about my worries regarding debt.


Have been looking through the forum and is strikes me that our joint debt of 40K is so much higher than most others.


I know it's not a competition and that everyone has different circumstances/income etc but I feel really dreadful and ashamed that I have ended up in this situation.


I know that I am fortunate that we now have a decent income (68kish)
and we are able to pay it off but I still feel really shell shocked that we have such a huge amount of debt.


Is this level of debt common? It seems that most people posting on here are worried about debts that are considerably smaller than mine!!

lindens

my advice is don't waste your energy worrying about it - you can't change the level - it is what it is.
Put all your energies into paying it off, keep using the snowball calculator to motivate you. you will soon become a spreadsheet Queen!

midlander81

Hi Lindens,


I know that you are right, I am just having a 'feel sorry for myself' day today!


It just terrifies me to see how much we owe and that our debt level seems so unusually high.

in_need_of_direction

I don't have credit card or personal loan debt. What I do have is a mortgage that I'd like to repay as it includes two batches of personal debt that I added to it over the years. You can't compare yourself to others as you've no idea of what went before for them. It doesn't matter what you owe, it matters that you tackle it from here. Best of luck.

Fridge03

It's about how you deal with that debt, regardless of what size it is.

Plus, if it makes you feel better I have seen a few people with a higher single debt!

Karen777

if it's more than you are comfortable with then it's high enough. We all have different amounts, different wages, different circumstances. What unites us is wanting rid. Try not to beat yourself up, just get on with getting rid of it! You never have to feel this way again.

elsien

A 10k debt on a miniscule income is as worrying and as difficult as a larger debt on a larger income. And this place is incredibly supportive for people trying to manage that. Ok there's a few tell it like it is types who can be a bit blunt, but that's sometimes because of people doing an ostrich impression re their debt levels. And most posters recognise that people need some treats to motivate them and keep them going.
So welcome to the forums, it's a good place for moral support if you decide not to go into more detail with your partner. (And if you do decide to sink a £200 bottle of claret, best to keep that little detail to yourself!)

longtermplanner

Anyone that hasn't made any mistakes in their lives is either lying or self-deluded. It's not going to help you get out of your debt hole by measuring it against other peoples.

In a couple of years you want to get your debt down to 10-15k, that's a big ambition and you need to start looking forward to feeling proud of getting to the milestones along the way. Have you stopped using the cards? Celebrate three months when aall your debt balances have gone down. Cheer when the first of your cards is paid off. tell us all when you get a 0% deal. etc etc

midlander81

Thanks Longtermplanner.


We are currently able to pay £1350 per month towards our debts and still have some money left to have a decent life ( nothing extravangant - just a pizza and bottle of wine on Friday night!!) so I think that we can realistically clear the bulk of the bext in 2 years. Most of the CC debt is on 0% or 6.9% for life so it does come down. We have a loan that we currently pay £364 per month which ends in 12 months so we will be able to throw that money at the CC's too.

FutureDreams

You are doing the right things
1. Recognising that your situation needs to change and doing something about it.
2. Coming here for fantastic support.
3. Having a few treats makes the journey a lot more comfortable.


It is certainly working for me it feels like a weight is slowly being lifted.

subboy2

All that matters is what we do with the time that is given to us...you are tackling your debts, so be proud and keep your head held high.