anxiety post BR...please advise

georgiasmum

Hello all,

I had hoped that post BR I would feel less anxious but it is worse! Instead of fearing threatening creditor letters I am now afraid of letters from the OR.

I am 5 weeks into it, she told me I would have the 'tax' IPA, I returned the forms promptly, sent the car insurance settlement payment and explained that I am due to have surgery again on my hand (post RTA) so will be in hospital and may not be able to deal with correspondence as promptly. She was fine with all that.

I am not sure why I am so anxious but am scared of a BRO or something else. I have no gambling debts or anything untoward as far as I can see. My biggest problem linked to my BR was domestic violence. My daughter and I lost everything running from him, coupled with tenants who did not pay their HB to me.. (don't get me started on the council, they told me it was against their rights or something...)

I told the OR all this and it was very painful to rehash it. Any advice to feel better? Is it normal to feel so emotional?

luvchocolate

emotional anxious..oh yes I was the same, like you I had been through hell at the hands of someone who took all my life savings, I will always remember at the meeting with my trustee her saying this is not the start of the next part..this is the end!!!
Did not really relax until I was discharged last year, unfortunately my saga continues as he is still living in a property mortgaged by me...very complicated.
you will feel better give it time , I hope you O.R is understanding mine was brilliant, keep your chin up there is a light at the end..xx

Jessiesgirl

Hey georgiasmum,

I had to do the same yesterday, bringing up the past is so hard and its bringing back memories, all this on top of worries of the bankruptcy process is really affecting my sleep, thinking etc.
Domestic violence is something i went through and how my debts started.
Just think at the end of all this you can put the past behind you and start a fresh! Much love to you all going through similar x

Contracts_Engineer

You have informed the relevant parties with all the relevant info. I would just put it in writing that your in hospital imminently. Also put the duration of your stay and a copy of any correspondence from the hospital as proof.
Then when you get home, if anything is marked as urgent you can, should there be any argument, show the original letter or email informing them.

Building up to BR is stressful, going BR is stressful, the next year while payments, if any, are sorted is stress full.

When you are discharged I felt great relief and with no debts have enough money to live a life.

Stick with it

National_Debtline

Hi GM

Sounds like you have been very thorough so far. In my experience, the folk who worry the most about BR are those with the least cause for concern... however it's easy to understand your anxiety, after all it is something of a leap into the unknown for you.

Just remember that the OR knows how to get in touch with you. Going into hospital is not the same as disappearing off the face of the earth and it's not as if you can help it (good luck with the surgery by the way).

Kind regards

Dennis
Twitter: @natdebtline

dancingfairy

It can be a time of stress and it sounds like you have other things going on in your life as well. A lot of people will feel better when they have gone bankrupt but for some it will take a while to sink in, for some it's when they have been discharged.
Hopefully when you've heard from the OR and had your operation things will start to look brighter and you will be able to look forward.
df
Edit: if you're struggling with the domestic violence issues and well just life in general your GP might be able to arrange some counselling or you may find help from a domestic violence charity useful.

georgiasmum

thanks for the replies. my OR contact seems to have finished for the moment. I have heard a few cases where months later they have been notified of bro's etc. I am having counselling but feel a bit low because of my injuries from my rtas. I had 2 accidents in 5 days and things are not healing well.
The OR is aware and has been fine about it all. I just feel a bit crappy